DrNo1962 Posted November 3, 2019 Posted November 3, 2019 Been dating a girl for almost 2 months now. We've been on 11 dates, but we haven't had "the talk" or any mention regarding exclusivity. At present, our schedules only allow us to see each other once per week (she works out of town during the week and only comes home on weekends.) However I am wondering in most instances, when do you move from once per week to more frequent catch-ups? I'm starting to get that feeling where you want to see you someone you like more than once per week and wandering if it's natural to feel that now or am I getting too ahead of myself.
alphamale Posted November 3, 2019 Posted November 3, 2019 hey Dr. No....I would wait for another month and then start spending the weekends together if you both agree. Try to put off the "talk" for as long as possible. I assume you two are having sex.
Author DrNo1962 Posted November 3, 2019 Author Posted November 3, 2019 hey Dr. No....I would wait for another month and then start spending the weekends together if you both agree. Try to put off the "talk" for as long as possible. I assume you two are having sex. Yes we are sleeping with each other and we do tend to spend the Saturday afternoon/evening together which rolls into Sunday.
alphamale Posted November 3, 2019 Posted November 3, 2019 Yes we are sleeping with each other and we do tend to spend the Saturday afternoon/evening together which rolls into Sunday. well, you're all set then. maybe you two can plan a weekend getaway
d0nnivain Posted November 3, 2019 Posted November 3, 2019 You move to more when it fits but if she's out of town, it may be logistically impossible. How far out of town? Can you conveniently travel to her for dinner on a weeknight?
carhill Posted November 3, 2019 Posted November 3, 2019 However I am wondering in most instances, when do you move from once per week to more frequent catch-ups? Depends on logistics. If schedules/distance is involved, then longer get-togethers if spaced further apart due to schedule/distance. Forex, the lady I married and I would usually get together once a week, due to a 60 mile distance between us, then progressed to alternating weekends by about the mark that you're at now, then planned some vacation time together as the relationship progressed. We still lived separately until getting married some 18 months after starting to date. At the two month mark though, ILY's were exchanged, we were exclusive and sexually active. That's one example. I have others where distance was more extreme, generally those involved large chunks of together time, like a number of weeks together, interspersed with months apart. Also, more local interactions where we'd see each other a couple times a week. IMO, if a couple wants to be together, they make it work out and the specifics aren't really an issue. Today, with mobile communications, video-chatting practically anywhere, etc, people can 'date' virtually when not in person. For most, in-person is the most satisfying but people will find a way.
Author DrNo1962 Posted November 4, 2019 Author Posted November 4, 2019 You move to more when it fits but if she's out of town, it may be logistically impossible. How far out of town? Can you conveniently travel to her for dinner on a weeknight? At the moment it's impracticle to make that happen as she is living 2hrs drive (one-way) and only comes home on weekends. My query is more around is it normal to feel like you want to see someone more than once a week at the 2-month mark?
carhill Posted November 4, 2019 Posted November 4, 2019 In your circumstances, yes, it should be normal to desire frequent contact. How's her contact in between in-person interactions? That's usually telling.
Ruby Slippers Posted November 4, 2019 Posted November 4, 2019 At the moment it's impracticle to make that happen as she is living 2hrs drive (one-way) and only comes home on weekends. My query is more around is it normal to feel like you want to see someone more than once a week at the 2-month mark? I was in a similar situation once, when he had to move 4 hours away for work after we'd just started dating. I let him take the lead in how we'd handle that. He let me know he saw real potential and asked if we could spend weekends together in either city and progress if that went well. I felt the same, so agreed to try it. We were together every Friday through Sunday and holidays and it worked fine. Eventually I spent more and more days with him, as I was location-independent with work at the time. Ultimately we went our separate ways, but the distance wasn't the slightest barrier.
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