Springsummer Posted October 30, 2019 Posted October 30, 2019 I didn't response to this hot dude for 1 day and he unmatched me:eek: why? I have a few that I haven't responded for months and they are still there. why? Swiping through tons of people to find one that's interesting is a hard job:(
Author Springsummer Posted October 30, 2019 Author Posted October 30, 2019 He said 'Thanks for the match' I said: "I like your quotes' he said: "not the shirtless pics? lol" or something like that. I don't remember the exact words I didn't know what to say for a bit more than a day... and then he deleted... he has some nice writing too, such as life is short, alpha male in every aspects, etc...
Author Springsummer Posted October 30, 2019 Author Posted October 30, 2019 anyway, is there a general rule for the timing?
rainbow12 Posted October 30, 2019 Posted October 30, 2019 He just wants a leg over don't worry about it. ;) 1
Author Springsummer Posted October 30, 2019 Author Posted October 30, 2019 One of his quotes says :"to have someone understand your mind is a different kind of intimacy". so I thought he wants a soul mate too
rainbow12 Posted October 30, 2019 Posted October 30, 2019 That quote means nothing, it's all about prowling like the other person said. The quotes he using are all just to trap girls. Do you want someone like that?
Legatus Posted October 31, 2019 Posted October 31, 2019 I never used Tinder but somehow trying to rationalise behaviour of people using it might not be the best idea?
Author Springsummer Posted October 31, 2019 Author Posted October 31, 2019 That quote means nothing, it's all about prowling like the other person said. The quotes he using are all just to trap girls. Do you want someone like that? I have never been trapped, so I think I am fine...so far.
Flame Aura Posted October 31, 2019 Posted October 31, 2019 I have never been trapped, so I think I am fine...so far. Most guys, if not all, use Tinder to find a woman to get into bed with. He didn't wait around because he found someone else who I guess was willing to give him what he wants. If you are looking for a serious relationship then stay away from OLD, and if you do match with someone then be prepared to take some time first to get to know them. If they don't want to wait then you don't want them anyway. 2
basil67 Posted October 31, 2019 Posted October 31, 2019 (edited) If you can't figure out what to say for a whole day, there should also be alarm bells ringing about incompatible communication styles. What would you have done if he said this to you when you were on a date? Would you have sat there like a stunned mullet or said something witty in reply? Whether he was looking for casual or a girlfriend, such a slow response to a direct flirt indicates lack of interest on your part. Edited October 31, 2019 by basil67 2
Author Springsummer Posted October 31, 2019 Author Posted October 31, 2019 If you can't figure out what to say for a whole day, there should also be alarm bells ringing about incompatible communication styles. What would you have done if he said this to you when you were on a date? Would you have sat there like a stunned mullet or said something witty in reply? Whether he was looking for casual or a girlfriend, such a slow response to a direct flirt indicates lack of interest on your part. I was actually busy the whole day at work. 1
TheFinalWord Posted October 31, 2019 Posted October 31, 2019 From my post in the General Relationship Forum. These were results from a study conducted using Tinder. Women tend to have a longer interval between matching and messaging than male users.63% of messages sent by men occur within 5 minutes of the match taking place. This is only 18% for women.But, if a female does match with you, eventually she is more likely to initiate communication if the male does not initiate first contact. "21% of female matches send a message, whereas only 7% of male matches send a message. Thus, women who match with us are 3 times more engaged than men"
BaileyB Posted October 31, 2019 Posted October 31, 2019 Whether he was looking for casual or a girlfriend, such a slow response to a direct flirt indicates lack of interest on your part. And such a direct flirt indicates exactly what he is looking to find... This would be no great loss for me. He threw out a line and the line came back empty. Next. 2
basil67 Posted October 31, 2019 Posted October 31, 2019 I guess I'm an instinctive flirt, so it wouldn't be odd to me even if the guy was looking for more than sex. 1
basil67 Posted October 31, 2019 Posted October 31, 2019 I was actually busy the whole day at work. No, you said "I didn't know what to say for a bit more than a day". In real life, if you're going to change your story to make yourself look better (hey, we've all done it) at least make sure that there's nothing around which will bring you undone It may well be that he was just after sex, but the same courtesy of not leaving a person hanging and ability to banter still applies when talking with a guy who is relationship minded. The best relationships have two people who can bounce conversation off each other. 2
Ruby Slippers Posted October 31, 2019 Posted October 31, 2019 As my mom said about my online date the other day, "Sounds like he was after one thing."
chillii Posted October 31, 2019 Posted October 31, 2019 Any fkhead asking if you liked the shirtless pic, even putting one in there actually, and calling himself an alpha male, spells moron to me all over it. And forget the quotes , just taken from his last coaching lesson. 1
basil67 Posted October 31, 2019 Posted October 31, 2019 True that. Any guy who says he's Alpha, isn't. Which is probably just as well because from what I'm reading here recently, Alphas sound like massive douches. But it's also douchey to say you're an Alpha when you're not. 2
notthatintome Posted October 31, 2019 Posted October 31, 2019 One of his quotes says :"to have someone understand your mind is a different kind of intimacy". so I thought he wants a soul mate too He sounds insecure who has had mental health problems in the past. The unmatching after a short time signifies this. A secure person would not worry so much, if at all. He would be high maintenance, you're better off without him.
rainbow12 Posted October 31, 2019 Posted October 31, 2019 OP what does it matter that he unmatched you anyway? You didn't care enough to respond to him in zero mins of your time to do that, so he can't be important can he? You should hang on to your hat for something new. 1
SumGuy Posted October 31, 2019 Posted October 31, 2019 I guess I'm an instinctive flirt, so it wouldn't be odd to me even if the guy was looking for more than sex. Same, but I think this guy has attention issues...or no life. 1 day really is too much for him? He can't understand that? Especially if he is looking for more than sex? Says to me he is looking just for quick sex and/or is very impatient and/or self absorbed.
SumGuy Posted October 31, 2019 Posted October 31, 2019 True that. Any guy who says he's Alpha, isn't. Which is probably just as well because from what I'm reading here recently, Alphas sound like massive douches. But it's also douchey to say you're an Alpha when you're not. You have my agreement. In my experience douches like to call all their douchery "alpha traits" and voila they are no longer douches but gods gift to women. It's an amazing magic trick. It's funny that they describe men who are successful with women who are not douches as "naturals," as an attempt to avoid cultivating non-douchy traits I wonder? That or start importing other letters of the Greek alphabet. 1
basil67 Posted October 31, 2019 Posted October 31, 2019 Same, but I think this guy has attention issues...or no life. 1 day really is too much for him? He can't understand that? Especially if he is looking for more than sex? Says to me he is looking just for quick sex and/or is very impatient and/or self absorbed. I don't agree. Most people seem to take a scatter approach to OLD. If you're only half interested in them to start with....I can't imagine it would take much persuasion to unmatch them.
SumGuy Posted October 31, 2019 Posted October 31, 2019 I don't agree. Most people seem to take a scatter approach to OLD. If you're only half interested in them to start with....I can't imagine it would take much persuasion to unmatch them. Maybe it’s my misunderstanding of Tinder. I’m not a throw it all at the wall and see what sticks person in OLD. At most may have sent out 6 likes or what have you outstanding, try to keep messaging numbers to even less.
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