hannahl9811 Posted October 27, 2019 Posted October 27, 2019 Went on the greatest date, but confused on how to approach communication from now on I went on a date with the greatest guy this past Friday and I don’t really know where to take it from here. It went extremely well, but he lives a few hours away as he is away at school. We met on a dating app this past August, but weren’t able to meet up because he moved back to school. We were talking here and there since then, but he told me he’d be home from college this weekend and meeting me was a high priority to him. We have so much in common and there were no awkward moments during the 5 or so hours we were together. He treated me very nicely, which is something I’m not really used to. We kissed a few times and I definitely felt a lot of romantic chemistry. Before he dropped me off he told me he definitely wants to see me when he’s back for Thanksgiving next month. He even mentioned me potentially visiting him at school, which I’d definitely be down to do. We definitely like each other, to say the least. We’ve talked a little bit since then, but I honestly don’t want to passively communicate with him till the next time I can see him. I don’t want to annoy him (as I typically feel like I bother people when I reach out), but I don’t want to fall into the habit I usually do where I express so little interest (out of fear of being seen as annoying), that he just forgets about me. I probably shouldn’t be so invested in this, but after such a rough pattern of relationships, it felt so nice to be around someone who was actually kind to me and who I had a lot in common with. Any advice on what approach I should take?
basil67 Posted October 27, 2019 Posted October 27, 2019 It all sounds very casual. Are your and his expectations of this aligned?
Author hannahl9811 Posted October 27, 2019 Author Posted October 27, 2019 It all sounds very casual. Are your and his expectations of this aligned? Honestly, we haven’t really discussed that. Only expectations that exist right now are that we will be seeing each other again.
basil67 Posted October 27, 2019 Posted October 27, 2019 I get the feeling that you're thinking this could be something serious, but his actions indicate it's a casual thing. Be careful. 1
kendahke Posted October 27, 2019 Posted October 27, 2019 Any advice on what approach I should take? Take this day by day and live in the present. 1
d0nnivain Posted October 27, 2019 Posted October 27, 2019 You are the girl back home & he's away at college. You were something fun to do while he was home. It was 1 date, not a commitment. His life is at school. Assume he's dating other girls on campus. Reach out through social media or text & thank him again for the date. See how he responds. If you hear from him great. If not, stop trying. At most the week before Thanksgiving . .. & I'm talking maybe that Sunday, you can send him 1 more text asking he's still coming home & suggesting that you get together. At most I see this turning into a hot summer romance when he's back full time but understand if you go up to school to visit him he's going to expect sex because the only place for you to sleep is the twin bed in his room. 1
alphamale Posted October 27, 2019 Posted October 27, 2019 woahhh! don't start naming the children yet. chill out and relax, what will be will be. if there is mutual attraction like you say then things will fall in place...just be cool, calm, and collected 1
preraph Posted October 27, 2019 Posted October 27, 2019 Too soon to know what this will be. But I think your instincts are right not to do a lot of texting between now and then. It just destroys the spark when you see each other, plus leaves nothing to talk about face to face. As long as you've told him you had a nice time, see when he contacts you again. Keep it short and upbeat and then like everyone says, closer to TG, hopefully he will bring that up again. For sure, he is seeing any other women he wants to at school. He's surrounded by them, so it's just a matter of how many he finds attractive and that are also interested. But never ever assume a guy away at college is going to be exclusive when you are not even in the same town. 1
smackie9 Posted October 28, 2019 Posted October 28, 2019 He's keeping you in mind and that's it. He won't commit to anything because of his situation. If you are looking for a fairy-tale romance, that ain't happening. 1
Michelle ma Belle Posted October 28, 2019 Posted October 28, 2019 This is often a problem - women who have a history of bad relationships suddenly encounter a "nice guy" who treats them well and BOOM they're already thinking long term. No one really knows his intentions at this point but given that he's back at school, he's likely not looking for anything too serious right now. I would keep it cool and continue dating other people. Don't wait around for him. If he reaches out and sets the date for your next meeting, wonderful but do yourself a huge favor and don't read into anything too soon. Chill. 1
alphamale Posted October 28, 2019 Posted October 28, 2019 This is often a problem - women who have a history of bad relationships suddenly encounter a "nice guy" who treats them well and BOOM they're already thinking long term. they're most likely thinking long term with one of their exes
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