Author MindYourBusiness Posted September 14, 2019 Author Posted September 14, 2019 I will keep you guys posted. For now I will sit back and see what he wants to do for the third date bc that should tell me a lot too 1
alphamale Posted September 14, 2019 Posted September 14, 2019 I will keep you guys posted. OK Lenila1992
Author MindYourBusiness Posted September 14, 2019 Author Posted September 14, 2019 Just realized that I forgot to share an moortant piece of information.. he wanted to take me to a restaurant and bar the second date but I was so tired after working 14h that I suggested staying in
Allupinnit Posted September 14, 2019 Posted September 14, 2019 If you take a moment, and be honest with yourself, what about this guy is making you anxious?
Author MindYourBusiness Posted September 14, 2019 Author Posted September 14, 2019 (edited) My past experiences. If you go back and read my posts from January 2018 you’ll understand. I posted a lot so the short version is basically that I got completely blind sided to the point where I questioned my own sanity. Also, we have a age difference now of 8 years so I guess our texting habits are different just as many other things that I’m Learning right now. When he is with me I have his undivided attention and he doesn’t even check his phone unless he wants to show me a pic or something. Edited September 14, 2019 by Lenila1992
Watercolors Posted September 14, 2019 Posted September 14, 2019 I am confused. What do you want from this guy? You are concerned about him not texting you, yet you pursued him after your first date together because he didn't ask you out for a second date. You had to ask him to meet up with you. Then, you told him you didn't want a fling, yet you slept with him on your second date. I think you are sending him mixed messages and should be very careful moving forward. You slept with him on the second date that you actually, technically, set up b/c he was "too busy" (see: not committed to see you again or he would have asked you out immediately after the second date). He didn't text you every day while he was out of town for work, which is only what a boyfriend in a long-term relationship does; not with a woman he had one date with. Now you are waiting for him to initiate a 3rd date, yet you were the one who pursued him to meetup with you at his place, where you two had sex on the second date. Do you just want a fling with this guy while you casually date other guys? This is exactly what I don't miss about online dating; all the game playing. I think you need to decide what you want, have better boundaries, not sleep with every guy on the 1st, 2nd, or 3rd dates, and let them pursue you. Chasing men who online date to date you, is essentially you telling them, that you don't really value yourself and are ok settling with whatever crap they throw at you. Men do not respect women who chase them. They just don't. If that's what you want out of online dating, ok. But if you want to get a serious relationship, this is not the way to go about it. 2
Allupinnit Posted September 14, 2019 Posted September 14, 2019 I agree with Watercolors - also because he's already made a point to tell you he's not looking for anything serious.
Author MindYourBusiness Posted September 14, 2019 Author Posted September 14, 2019 He didn’t say that! He says he’s in a neutral space and open.
Watercolors Posted September 14, 2019 Posted September 14, 2019 (edited) I agree with Allupinit. He told you he was only looking for a casual fling -- and that's exactly what you gave him, by sleeping with him on the second date. Look, if you don't want to have casual flings, and you tell guys that you don't want to have casual flings, then don't have casual flings by sleeping with guys so early on. There should be no confusion in your mind now, that he is not interested in pursuing anything serious with you. You've gone and taken all the work away for him now anyway, having slept with him; having' initiated the second date he was not interested enough to make himself with you. Edited September 15, 2019 by a LoveShack.org Moderator 1
winny Posted September 15, 2019 Posted September 15, 2019 Yes we did. Oh crap!!! Why would you have a second date at his home??????????
alphamale Posted September 15, 2019 Posted September 15, 2019 Why would you have a second date at his home?????????? to have sex winny, most likely 2
stillafool Posted September 15, 2019 Posted September 15, 2019 Still OP, you didn't answer the question. "What Do You Want"?
stillafool Posted September 15, 2019 Posted September 15, 2019 Just realized that I forgot to share an moortant piece of information.. he wanted to take me to a restaurant and bar the second date but I was so tired after working 14h that I suggested staying in Then you should have cancelled and waited until you felt better to go on a proper date. Your suggesting to stay in pretty much said all you wanted was sex, he delivered so be it. You are already a FWB. 2
winny Posted September 16, 2019 Posted September 16, 2019 to have sex winny, most likely :lmao: yeah I know... thats why... its just dumb to sleep with someone so fast and then ask around why it did not work out!
DrNo1962 Posted September 16, 2019 Posted September 16, 2019 If he "couldn't stop thinking about you", why did he wait 2 days to continue to think about you as opposed to communicating with you? Sounds like lip service. Genuine compliments are backed up by action. Words alone are what snake-oil salesmen rely on. Buyer beware. 1
winny Posted September 16, 2019 Posted September 16, 2019 If he "couldn't stop thinking about you", why did he wait 2 days to continue to think about you as opposed to communicating with you? Sounds like lip service. Genuine compliments are backed up by action. Words alone are what snake-oil salesmen rely on. Buyer beware. i had the same thought... it takes less than 30 seconds to send a text.
Author MindYourBusiness Posted September 17, 2019 Author Posted September 17, 2019 So he tried to take me out tonight but I can’t because of another commitment. Then I suggested Friday but he has these get togethers with his co workers once a month but said he would be free after that. Would you guys give it a go or reschedule?
alphamale Posted September 17, 2019 Posted September 17, 2019 So he tried to take me out tonight but I can’t because of another commitment. Then I suggested Friday but he has these get togethers with his co workers once a month but said he would be free after that. Would you guys give it a go or reschedule? did he call you first? if so, I would suggest brunch on this Sunday 1
The Outlaw Posted September 17, 2019 Posted September 17, 2019 He may have not wanted to appear clingy hence the two day wait. There's always that chance that he isn't interested, but should you not hear back from him about a second date, try to make plans with him instead. Initiate.
stillafool Posted September 17, 2019 Posted September 17, 2019 So he tried to take me out tonight but I can’t because of another commitment. Then I suggested Friday but he has these get togethers with his co workers once a month but said he would be free after that. Would you guys give it a go or reschedule? Did you contact him or did he contact you for a date? If he's getting together with his co-workers Friday that would mean you wouldn't see him until later that night around the booty call hour. If you are looking for more sex go with it if not; you should wait for him to contact you and ask you out on a date. 1
alphamale Posted September 17, 2019 Posted September 17, 2019 that's why I suggested Sunday brunch stillafool 1
The Outlaw Posted September 17, 2019 Posted September 17, 2019 Didn't see your update. Reschedule and go from there.
Author MindYourBusiness Posted September 17, 2019 Author Posted September 17, 2019 He contacted me for the date! But he asked initially for a day where I’m busy. I like the brunch idea! Our first date wasn’t til 9pm either and we were out bowling etc til pretty late so if he’s free at around 9 and has something planned I’ll give it a go and if not I’m gonna reschedule 1
justwhoiam Posted September 17, 2019 Posted September 17, 2019 if he’s free at around 9 and has something planned I’ll give it a go I'd turn down Friday night, and brunch on Sunday would be perfect. But I have a feeling he doesn't want to meet you during the day. 1
stillafool Posted September 17, 2019 Posted September 17, 2019 To be honest, I do not regret the sex part or think that there’s something too early. I wanted it too or I wouldn’t have slept with it. I guess I have a different opinion about that than most people in this forum. Since you are also dating other guys this one might think you have sex on the first date with them too. What made this guy different?
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