LeojDon Posted September 3, 2019 Posted September 3, 2019 So long story short - we met in Thailand (both 23 y/o) I was backpacking and she worked in a hostel so we knew each other for a month. She's from Italy i'm from England. We got really close and travelled together for 3 weeks. Stayed in contact after returning home and then met in Italy for a week, then Germany and then recently Croatia. They were all magical, after 5 months we've both fallen for each other deeply and are officially together. Now she's moving to my city for 6-12 months as part of her University course. The main issue: recently she told me that at the beginning (when I was chasing her) she felt I was really turned on and found her exotic and sexy. She said due to just how I was around her, my eye contact etc. Now she says she feels I find her body "familiar" and that she's felt more adored (sexually wise) by previous guys which kinda hurt me, as I'm really affectionate around her and feel as though I make her feel special. I don't feel like I behave differently to her, only difference being at the start we were in a group scenario then after it was just us two each time. She says it's not a big issue but I can see it becoming one down the line when she feels she needs this. I noticed in our last meet up she was a little less flirty but the chemistry and connection was intense and incredible. She then went on to say that sometimes she feels I take her for granted and now that I've 'got her' I've relaxed. I feel i'm the exact same to when we first met but she blames it on culture difference? it just hurt me as I'm literally obsessed with her, always notice what she wears, her hair, dresses everything. I just feel like I can't do the right thing and that she may seek it elsewhere from someone else further down the line. She also said that she feels like I give her the same feeling a guy would give to a girl he'd been with for 10 years and it really hurt me. It seems these issues always arise through just texting, but then when we meet in person the issues are non-existent and we connect unbelievably. How can I address this?
scooby-philly Posted September 3, 2019 Posted September 3, 2019 Dear OP, It sounds like she's used to heavy attention and having someone wrapped around her finger. IF what you shared about the dynamic and how you've been acting is true - run away! Either she's playing games to wrap you around her finger more than you already are, or she's got issues that you don't need to be a part of no matter how you feel about her. No one should ever compare you to their ex(es). That's not fair. Either she likes/wants you and likes what you have or she doesn't. There's absolutely no reason to feel bad. Real relationships eventually become about a deeper, less superficial feeling after a while. No matter why she feels afraid of that it's not your job or concern to address it for her. Confront her about it. If she overreacts then you have your answer. If you decide to not respond if she talks like that and she over reactsthen you have another answer.
Recommended Posts