Prettyinblack Posted September 28, 2005 Posted September 28, 2005 The b/f and I have been split up for 2 months over him losing his temper with me because I was entertaining the idea of working with another male musician and I won't play with him. I haven't played professionally for about 3 1/2 years due to getting really sick with Chron's disease 4 years ago and losing my mother to cancer. Then, I lost my motivation and drive to play music.....took my mom's death really hard. My b/f is a great blues player and has always wanted me to jam with him but I can't! He is soooooo good and I feel so out of shape musically so I thought I would start out with a guy musician around town to sort of get my 'chops' in order while continually working on my self-confidence so that one day, Marty and I could play together. So, that is the history. He flipped when I told him I was considering playing with this other guitar player and walked out saying he couldn't deal with it anymore. I spoke to him for the first time last week and we talked about it. He said he can't deal with it (my playing with other men but not with him) and I said he didn't have to, because it never happened. We talked for about a 1/2 hour and then I said I had to go and we hung up. None of, "I'll talk to you later" or anything but just "K, I gotta go, Bye." His birthday was on Friday and I dropped a card off at his house. An "I miss you" card with a pic I had taken from last Christmas of him and his elderly parents. He called as soon as he got in and was soooo thrilled about the card. The conversation went great. He said that he was trying out for a country band that night and the sound of his voice was kind of like " ohhhhhhh.....this is what i'm doing tonight......" like he was sorry he was getting together with this band and then the conversation ended with "OK, I'll talk to you really soon..." Well, that was on Friday. By the tone of his voice, I could tell that he was 'still there' if you know what I mean but I haven't heard from him. We had been together for 3 years or so but had been rocky for about the last 8 months due to taking the relationship to the next leve. (I wantedt o move in together but he dragged his feet). So what do you guys think?????? Is there any hope, do you think or was he just being friendly or should I move on or just wait it out?
Jayhawks Posted September 28, 2005 Posted September 28, 2005 So what do you guys think?????? Is there any hope, do you think or was he just being friendly or should I move on or just wait it out? I think you have two choices; wait on him to change is mind for a long term relationship or not. You know him so you know your prospects of him changing his mind better than we do. The real question is, what do you want and what are you willing to do to get it? Are you willing to wait for him and see where it leads? Do you think that by waiting he will see his life as incomplete and want you back? Do you really want someone who is not totally committed to you? Tough question for you to answer. I think the ball is in your court and your decision, not his. P.S. I would go ahead and jam for the guy you wanted to play with.
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