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Should I give him my # or accept the fact that he wants nothing to do with me?

Wonderingwonder

By Wonderingwonder
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Wonderingwonder Member

Wonderingwonder

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I think you are over romanticizing this whole thing. How can you feel a connection if you never really had a true conversation with him or know anything personal about him? The only connection you think you have is your attraction to him...and your imagination. We desire most what we can't have and with him being aloof increases that desire. So now you have this image of what you think he is in your head....it's just a fantasy. Every move he makes you plant it in your head as you both having this hot interaction of two ships passing in the night.

 

The reality is you make him feel awkward, he's not comfortable around you, this illusion you have of him will disappear the min you do find out what he's like, this won't work.

 

Yeah, not true. I did nothing to make him uncomfortable or awkward. Did you not read the thread? Someone who is uncomfortable doesn't come around me frequently and make eye contact and smile at me. And he doesn't purposely run into me multiple times when I am alone either. And it's obvious that he did it. I was there. You were not. He only avoided me after I avoided him.

 

So you can think what you want. It isn't accurate or relevant to the situation that I described at all.

 

Have a good one.

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Wonderingwonder Member

Wonderingwonder

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How does he interact with other people at work?

 

He seems to keep to himself and is really quiet. He seems to avoid his supervisor, and he roams around quietly. He doesnt look nervous when talking to others and he isnt talkative. People approach him.

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Wonderingwonder Member

Wonderingwonder

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Strongly agree with this.

 

or the awkwardness is due to his insecurity and strong attraction to you.

 

gosh, I also involuntary got nervous whenever I ran into the guy I am attracted to. You can feel the nervousness, probably the guy in my workplace can feel my nervousness too. We are peers, but he is just too good looking and that makes me feel insecure.

 

Thank you. Someone just told me I make him uncomfortable and it's all in my head. It's like they didn't at all read the thread.

smackie9 Established Member

smackie9

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Yeah, not true. I did nothing to make him uncomfortable or awkward. Did you not read the thread? Someone who is uncomfortable doesn't come around me frequently and make eye contact and smile at me. And he doesn't purposely run into me multiple times when I am alone either. And it's obvious that he did it. I was there. You were not. He only avoided me after I avoided him.

 

So you can think what you want. It isn't accurate or relevant to the situation that I described at all.

 

Have a good one.

I only have what you put into the opening post to go on. It's good you came forward and "clarified" the circumstances. You did make him uncomfortable when you ignored him....is that not obvious? I'm not denying he has an interest in you. But I think you are blowing his image you have of him out of proportion. you don't even know this guy...nothing about him at all....only that he smiles at you and pushes a broom.

preraph Established Member

preraph

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I'm just having a hard time with why anyone would pursue someone who acted like him. He sounds barely functioning. And you're imagining all these things about him when you've never even been able to have any talk with him. It's all in your head.

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Wonderingwonder Member

Wonderingwonder

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I'm just having a hard time with why anyone would pursue someone who acted like him. He sounds barely functioning. And you're imagining all these things about him when you've never even been able to have any talk with him. It's all in your head.

 

I haven't "imagined" a thing. There is absolutely no indication whatsoever in my thread that I've "imagined" anything. If you dont have anything relevant or helpful to say then keep on scrolling.

preraph Established Member

preraph

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Hey, you came for opinions. You don't get to limit what the opinions are.

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Wonderingwonder Member

Wonderingwonder

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Hey, you came for opinions. You don't get to limit what the opinions are.

 

You don't get to tell me what I "don't get to do". You told me I "imagined things" and you are wrong. Period. It's as simple as that. There was no indication that I imagined things from the thread. So I will "tell you" what I want. And you don't get to tell me to do otherwise.

Johnjohnson2017 Established Member

Johnjohnson2017

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Have you talked to your coworkers about him? What do they think of him?

 

Does he talk to anyone? How does he interact with other people?

 

He might be shy around you because he likes you. If you see him interacting normally with some people, but shy around you, then he might have feelings for you. It's hard to tell.

 

You can leave him a note. I'm not sure he will respond to it but give it try anyway. You have nothing to lose by doing so as you are leaving anyway.

d0nnivain Established Member

d0nnivain

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Do not leave a note. Speak directly to the guy or he will think he's being teased.

d0nnivain Established Member

d0nnivain

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Wonderingwonder --

 

I just fear that the note will be poorly received. I suspect the guy is a bit socially awkward & he has some kind of hang up about your various stations in life with him being worried that as a janitor he's not good enough for you. If you only give a note he may think he's being set up to be humiliated. In his shoes that is what I would think; heck that is what I did think when the Captain of the Football team gave nerdy little me a note in high school. I tore it up in front of him to show him that he couldn't make a fool of me, like all those cheesy 80s movies where the nerd gets picked on. Years later I learned the guy had been sincere but shy & he was so hurt by my actions.

 

[]

 

Do actually speak to your crush & make all future assessments from there.

Edited by a LoveShack.org Moderator
PRW Established Member

PRW

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Yeah, not true. I did nothing to make him uncomfortable or awkward. Did you not read the thread?
I think she read the thread and I agree with her. All you have to do is stand there, be breathing, and look at him,...and he would be uncomfortable.

 

Someone who is uncomfortable doesn't come around me frequently and make eye contact and smile at me.
That means he is exactly uncomfortable. A normal person would just walk up to you, relaxed, and have a normal conversation. He does not do that,...he may feel attraction,...but is certainly not comfortable.

 

He only avoided me after I avoided him.
Because he interpreted that as rejection, and he "fled" from the interpreted rejection. A guy like this expects to be rejected,...is waiting to be rejected, and is ready to interpret anything as rejection. The potentially dangerous thing is how someone like that will respond to the rejection. Some just go away, while some refuse to go away, become stalkers, or worse.

 

It isn't accurate or relevant to the situation that I described at all.
I think it was accurate and dove-tails with what I was trying to tell you.
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Wonderingwonder Member

Wonderingwonder

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I think it was accurate and dove-tails with what I was trying to tell you.

 

I never "imagined" a thing. So no, it was not accurate at all.

Edited by a LoveShack.org Moderator
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