Thedubman Posted August 4, 2019 Posted August 4, 2019 Friday night I had a very great first date and set up a second date for the following weekend, Saturday. Before our first date we did text everyday but it was nothing crazy, maybe 5 to 10 exchanges a day. I can tell by the way she text that she is not a big texter. Most reply’s are 4-6 words. And a lot of the time it takes her a little while to reply. At first I thought she was not interested but she definitely is. Loves sending me flirty messages and sexy pictures. I personally love she’s not a huge texter. My question is if I should continue to text her everyday or do you think I can tone it down to maybe a few times leading up to Saturday? I really don’t want to come off needy but at the same time I don’t want to turn her off by changing my texting habits. Any advice on how I should play this? It seems things can be very fragile between the 1st and 2nd date. Thanks
Versacehottie Posted August 4, 2019 Posted August 4, 2019 Not 100% sure it will be the answer because like you said this is a fragile period, but if I were in your shoes, make reference to the fact that you have a super busy work/social week ahead, that way her mind will be able to explain away the lower level of contact. I think even if she is not a big texter, she would probably wonder why if your texting drops off. And probably be a little disappointed & confused. Good luck
bckseat Posted August 5, 2019 Posted August 5, 2019 Friday night I had a very great first date and set up a second date for the following weekend, Saturday. Wrong!! move. As a matter of fact it is a needy move on your part. It's need in that you telling her you want a relationship with her.. Proper thing to do is to not setup any plans during your first date. Women's plans are written in pencil anyway. It's her job to screen you from half a dozen or so other guys, she does it by testing you, that includes your neediness. Next time (and there is going to be next time) try this. Do not setup plans for your next date on the first date, that's needy. You test her as well, see if she shows up on date on time, wait only certain amount of time (for example you can be late 20 minutes and wait for her 10 minutes, that's 30 minutes already).. The way you pass her test of not showing up on time, is you move on, and don't wait for her. Anything above 30 minutes late is straight out disrespect. Test her interest by kissing her. Interested girl should be willing to kiss you. You can move past kissing if you slick, that way you will know if this girl is relationship material or more of a one night stand -- it is totally fine, some women are not looking for relationship. And above all, do not set plans for your next date after that initial date. You do whatever, and you don't even call her that day, or the next day. It was a Sunday date? Call her up Wednesday, or if she calls you earlier that's even better. Then on Wednesday you setup your plans. You keep her wondering this way, did you like her, or not. The way you did, she already knows she has you, so you might not even get that 2nd date you want so much. I really don’t want to come off needy Now about texting between dates.. Forget good morning, and good night texts. That's horrible. 1 text per day is called high interest. If you text her at least 1 text per day it is high interest. Ideal is when she send you texts, showing you she has high interest in you. Do this, texting is only for logistics, even then it's better to pick up the phone and give her a call. Do not text her between dates, unless she texts you, then you wait 5 to 10 minutes and reply. You are a man. Let me write it in bald, you're a man. And what does a man do? Man makes money. You don't have time to text her, you're on your purpose making money my man. With texts what are you trying to prove her? That you care? Believe me, show don't care that you care. She has other options, always. You're not alone. Other men do blow up her phone daily, do say good morning, and good night. Do you think they have a chance?? NO. Be different.. Let her wonder why he is not like those other men I'm dating. 1
PRW Posted August 5, 2019 Posted August 5, 2019 Friday night I had a very great first date and set up a second date for the following weekend, Never plan the next date while you are in the middle of the current one. Saturday. Before our first date we did text everyday but it was nothing crazy, maybe 5 to 10 exchanges a day.Not crazy,...insane. You should text once a day or so after the date to set up the next date. The phone is for setting dates, not "visiting" or "getting to know someone" (that is what the date is for). I can tell by the way she text that she is not a big texter. Most reply’s are 4-6 words.Because she is ready to throw the phone across the room. Yes, when you change text habits now it will set off alerts in her mind. You kind of screwed the pouch by starting a bad habit right from the first date. You need to back off the texting,...but now you are going to have to actually tell her you are going to and why you are doing it so that she doesn't get the wrong idea,...and how you tell her can also blow up in your face, so you created a touchy situation. Tell her that you don't think it is a good thing to text so much between dates and that you want to "save the conversations" for the dates so you have more to talk about and look more forward to the dates. Cross your fingers and hope she doesn't take that in a bad way. The right way is to not text between the dates except to set the next date and make any adjustments to plans. If she initiates a text to you then respond in a normal friendly way,...but don't drag it out. Avoid humor and sarcasm that can easily be taken the wrong way in a text.
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