MATTYD Posted July 24, 2019 Posted July 24, 2019 Had a pretty crap breakup with an alcoholic ex. ****ed me about in all manor of ways. Contacts me after like 8-10 weeks of nothing. Wants to meet up so we do. She kisses me, moans about her new life with new guy. We then spend the next five days together. And it was like it was in the beginning. We were intimate but not full sex. Told me she still misses and loves me and crap we can't be together as we don't work. Oh and she gave me sti genital warts. I didn't know about the warts when we went away. We smoothed things over which was great. Admittedly I came back confused. Do I tell her she has the hpv wart virus. She's probably passed it on to new guy. Very weirdly she doesn't regard going away and be quite intimate with me as cheating! Now tells me not to contact her. I know from her family she isn't having a great time and gone to or going to a yoga treat for alone time. She sounds like still drinking and things not as she'd hoped with other guy. Told me she gets bored easily and I wasn't enough for her. I wonder why she hung around so long then. Can't be that much of a boring arse for her to do so. Anyway I don't blame or hate her. She's mentally ill and probably has a long road ahead. Should she be in a relationship right now. Probably not. Of course I'm gonna say that but I'd like to see her well and happy. She had a bad childhood. Lots of boyfriends and we're all arseholes! Anyway after my terrible ordeal I'm going travelling soon. Of course for me but also it'll show her I don't want her back and not wrapped around her finger. Many mates say she's the type of girl to contact again. Anyway, I'd like to send her one final text. Which shows no blame or a grudge. That I have strength and feelings for her without looking weak. That it would be nice to see her before I go travelling. Offer support cause she might need just a loyal friend at the moment. You all get the idea. Just something to show actually I do have balls and can be alpha. But at the same time not being a robot and still care. And if anything she said to me on our trip four weeks ago was slightly genuine then when ready come join me in Europe and I'll show I'm now the guy to make her feel content, safe and loved. She has said she doesn't love herself. Does what I want to say to her make me sound a total pussy!!?? Matt
preraph Posted August 24, 2019 Posted August 24, 2019 To me, this poor woman has so many problems that I just don't know why you'd want to stay involved. She's not treating you right, she's not treating herself right, she's an alcoholic or addict, and she seems to have no remorse and doesn't take any responsibility for her actions. Also, jeez, wear a condom! You'll be lucky if you EVER get rid of this woman because she has no conscience and feels free to come round and jack you up anytime she wants. I wouldn't worry about the alpha/beta thing. I'd worry about getting myself to where I had some ethics and boundaries and expected more in a relationship and behaved better in one yourself as well.
BlueV12 Posted August 24, 2019 Posted August 24, 2019 (edited) Also good luck with the warts. I had them too, it took ten, YES TEN, doctor visits and treatment to get rid of them. And hundreds of dollars. And they may come back in the future despite treatment. It was a nightmare. Sorry bro. Edited August 24, 2019 by BlueV12
Author MATTYD Posted September 8, 2019 Author Posted September 8, 2019 Thanks for the replies. Well since writing this post she's been in touch through email. Why on earth will she let weeks and weeks go by and then get in touch? Acusing me of stealing her stuff. Blackmailing me and threatening police. But not if I 'play nice' as she says. She doesn't believe me about the warts. She thinks I'm just constantly lying. Saying I owe her money. Says how happy she is with her new bloke. Find that bull**** to be honest. If she was I'd be out the picture. Clearly stalking me online.
ExpatInItaly Posted September 8, 2019 Posted September 8, 2019 You're not dealing with a stable person, so you won't really ever understand her motivations. You're not wired the same way she is. You already know this, though. I hope you blocked the address she was emailing you from.
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