Frazzle Posted July 20, 2019 Posted July 20, 2019 I met this girl at a meetup and asked for her number saying that we should go eat sometime. She gave me her number and we texted for a bit. I thought it was going well and she was interested. We talked about her dogs and I asked her to send me pictures of her dogs and she happily obliged. However, the conversation slowed down and when I asked her to go eat, she asked if she could bring her friends. I knew at this point that she was not interested but still went anyway. I wanted to get a definitive answer from her so I asked her out on a date and she said she was already dating someone else. I guess my question is whether she knew I was interested in her when I asked for her number. Otherwise, why would she give me her number if she was already dating someone. She could have said no right there and then. If she was lying about dating someone else, was she ever interested? I felt like we had some good text conversations before it fizzled out.
d0nnivain Posted July 20, 2019 Posted July 20, 2019 You don't know she lied. She may have met the guy she was dating between giving you her # & when you asked her out. She could be lying. Whether she lied or not about the existence of a BF, she was telling the truth about not wanting to date you. In the end, that is the only truth that matters. Sorry.
devilish innocent Posted July 20, 2019 Posted July 20, 2019 I think she just saw you as a potential new friend. She didn't think giving out her phone number was inappropriate as long as the conversation stayed innocent. 2
kendahke Posted July 20, 2019 Posted July 20, 2019 I met this girl at a meetup and asked for her number saying that we should go eat sometime. She gave me her number and we texted for a bit. I thought it was going well and she was interested. We talked about her dogs and I asked her to send me pictures of her dogs and she happily obliged. However, the conversation slowed down and when I asked her to go eat, she asked if she could bring her friends. I knew at this point that she was not interested but still went anyway. I wanted to get a definitive answer from her so I asked her out on a date and she said she was already dating someone else. I guess my question is whether she knew I was interested in her when I asked for her number. Otherwise, why would she give me her number if she was already dating someone. She could have said no right there and then. If she was lying about dating someone else, was she ever interested? I felt like we had some good text conversations before it fizzled out. She may have told you she was dating someone else because she's not at that meet up to find any boyfriends--hence wanting her girls to come along to corral the conversation away from you trying to get her to date you--which may not be why she's even in the meetup group. She didn't owe you what you wanted just because you have interest.
Versacehottie Posted July 20, 2019 Posted July 20, 2019 I met this girl at a meetup and asked for her number saying that we should go eat sometime. She gave me her number and we texted for a bit. I thought it was going well and she was interested. We talked about her dogs and I asked her to send me pictures of her dogs and she happily obliged. However, the conversation slowed down and when I asked her to go eat, she asked if she could bring her friends. I knew at this point that she was not interested but still went anyway. I wanted to get a definitive answer from her so I asked her out on a date and she said she was already dating someone else. I guess my question is whether she knew I was interested in her when I asked for her number. Otherwise, why would she give me her number if she was already dating someone. She could have said no right there and then. If she was lying about dating someone else, was she ever interested? I felt like we had some good text conversations before it fizzled out. Was it a dating meet up? If so, then yes I think she is lying. If she was at a dating meet up then presumably she is open and ready to date and not that shy. Obviously she brought the friends as a buffer which you could tell. I think if the meet up was NOT a dating meet up then she could be: *Attracted to you be either actually dating someone else, that came to fruition in the time you've been talking, or her heart is with someone else. *She likes you but isn't ready, due to shyness, immaturity or getting over someone else. *She didn't feel there was enough there between you guys but likes you as a friend or possibly putting you in her back pocket for later or because she is undecided. Some girls take longer to warm up and aren't so straightforward. *She thought you might be good for one of her friends. And/or just wants to expand her friend group, including you.
preraph Posted July 20, 2019 Posted July 20, 2019 I hope you didn't end up paying for her and her friends. That just sounds like a free lunch to me.
The Outlaw Posted July 20, 2019 Posted July 20, 2019 Her intentions may have been pure originally, but at least she was upfront when you asked her out. But I'd just leave it at that. All you can do is try with someone else. 1
Kelliousme Posted July 20, 2019 Posted July 20, 2019 I don't see it as she lied. I see it as poor handling on her part. She might've seen you as a potential friend like someone else had said. Personally I wouldn't assume a guy is interested in me just because he's asking for my number. I mean.. I feel like it would be weird if I just say "I have a boyfriend" straight off the bat. The guy could get all defensive and say "woah woah hold on, don't assume so much.. just trying to make friends here". Ya know? HOWEVER, she could've said no to going out to eat. Instead of bringing her friends along.. that's RUDE. Or she could've said something that would let you know she has a BF. Unless she's just that oblivious and you have to say it to her face for her to know you're interested. Who knows. :/ Sorry to hear though, but NEXT! Don't give up, this is just a little bump
beentheredonethat77 Posted July 20, 2019 Posted July 20, 2019 Ok so my take is that she WAS interested then you said something in the conversation that turned her off (around the time you were texting about dogs -- maybe you dropped something in there that was a deal breaker for her.. sometimes it can be small things) -- she didnt want to be rude and say "oh i dont like that you said that and it turns me off" --- so she threw every thing she could ie can i bring friends / i have a boyfriend. Shes not interested. i dont think she lied, i think through the filtering process of pre-dating/ dating.. you hit a filter. 1
Versacehottie Posted July 20, 2019 Posted July 20, 2019 totally agree with beentheredonethat77!!! And kelli has a great point about it feels rude to blurt out that you have a bf when you are not sure why the person wants to get your number. That happens all the time.
Larry56 Posted July 21, 2019 Posted July 21, 2019 Yes, she led you on. LOL @ these comments covering for women's covert attention seeking operation. "She might have been between two guys". GTFO out of here with that nonsense. Look dude, you're going to find this with every woman that doesn't find you attractive/or as attractive as the guy she's dealing with. They will use you for attention. It's just their nature. Don't feel bad for it. But this is what they do. Also, don't take advice from women because they will always redirect the conversation to cover other women's bad behavior.
Larry56 Posted July 21, 2019 Posted July 21, 2019 totally agree with beentheredonethat77!!! And kelli has a great point about it feels rude to blurt out that you have a bf when you are not sure why the person wants to get your number. That happens all the time. Oh that's just hilarious. You know 99% of the time men want the pussy. Stop pretending women don't like attention because it fuels the EGO.
PRW Posted July 21, 2019 Posted July 21, 2019 I met this girl at a meetup and asked for her number saying that we should go eat sometime.You didn't ask her out, you only asked her what she "thought" about the "concept" of going on a date "sometime". It is a very weak approach and gives all your power away. Either offer a specific date at a specific day/time/place, or just don't bring it up until you can. She gave me her number and we texted for a bit. I thought it was going well and she was interested.She was trying to be "nice". To refuse to give you her number would have been an obvious and clear rejection that would have made her feel bad for doing it and would have created awkwardness. We talked about her dogs and I asked her to send me pictures of her dogs and she happily obliged. However, the conversation slowed down andShe was being friendly. when I asked her to go eat, she asked if she could bring her friends. I knew at this point that she was not interestedCorrect I wanted to get a definitive answer from her so I asked her out on a date and she said she was already dating someone else.Never worry about a "definitive" answer, it is unimportant and makes you look weak for asking. She gave you the most respectful rejection that she could give you. Take it. It doesn't matter if she really has a BF,...she is telling you that you have enough value that you could potentially be competition to her alleged BF (whether she actually has one or not). It doesn't matter how much is really true, in a situation like this it really is "the thought that counts",...so just take it gracefully. I felt like we had some good text conversations before it fizzled out.There is no such thing as a good text conversation. It fizzled out because that is the inevitable end of all text conversations trying to be used in place of in-person conversations.
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