DrNo1962 Posted July 15, 2019 Posted July 15, 2019 A girl I’ve yet to meet has flaked on me twice (we matched online and I’ve set dates on two seperate occasions). On the second time she flaked she was extremely apologetic and even offered to cook for me (on a first date??). When I asked her what day she’s free to go out, she said “maybe Monday, but I’ll need to confirm with you on Sunday because I don’t want to cancel on you again”. I said that she should shoot me a text when she knows she’s definitely free and we’ll make a plan then. To which she replied, perfect but can you leave Monday open for me? I let her know that even though I’d love to see her, I only commit to definite plans and that if she makes herself available to me, I’ll commit to the day she nominates. Is that too harsh or was I reasonable enough?
elaine567 Posted July 15, 2019 Posted July 15, 2019 Why can't she commit? Is it work or some other valid reason? If not, then how can you date if her social calendar is so full she cannot even give you a Monday night...
OatsAndHall Posted July 15, 2019 Posted July 15, 2019 You weren't harsh at all; you were quite reasonable. But, you might want to reconsider whether you want to keep seeing her, depending on the circumstances surrounding her cancelling the dates. Also, I would consider her asking you to leave Monday "open" for you a red-flag; she needs to commit to a day and stick with it.
Curiousroxy86 Posted July 15, 2019 Posted July 15, 2019 I would have ignored her or at the least stopped asking her out after she flaked the second time and if she wanted to make plans with me she would know how to get in contact with me and if the plans were not concrete I wouldn’t have taken it seriously. I would make my own plans. If she made concrete plans and I don’t gave any other plans then she can get one more chance to follow through and if she flake again ignore for good You can show her better than you can tell her But how you feel is very very reasonable. I do not recommend men entertain flaky women at all 1
smackie9 Posted July 15, 2019 Posted July 15, 2019 Flaked twice? I'd be done with it.....makes you wonder why they bother being on a dating site and be that busy. I agree it's not a harsh thing to want to set your expectations firmly. If they have an issue with that then they are not the right person to date.
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