Mayaiana Posted July 7, 2019 Posted July 7, 2019 So he's a young doctor I work with. We've had our spats or when he's told me something he's realized i have a leader personalitY(also applying to medical school). I was in his office and he said yeah even working in this company he isn't his own bossy might as well work for uber I said yes. Then he said well atleast I'm your boss. I was uncomfortable and looked to my side. He said you did'nt like that did you? I said no. He said I know smiling. I said how do you know? He said because no one can tell you anything..not even your man. I found this strange I said yes because i'm powerful and it has to be equal and he has to respect me. He said yes but you have to put down your walls a bit. I said yes becasue I don't let people in, no one's on my level. He said I know no one's on MY level. I said really? he said yeahi Have my walls up too. I said then why are you telling me to put my walls down when yours are up? He said because I'm working on mine too. Why did he have this conversation with me? He also always smiles when talking to me, makes jokes etc.
JEG88 Posted July 7, 2019 Posted July 7, 2019 Is this the same guy you posted about before? Wondering about his "mixed signals"? Or someone else?
alphamale Posted July 7, 2019 Posted July 7, 2019 most doctors treat women like sh*t and have trouble keeping their dicks in their pants, stay away 2
Author Mayaiana Posted July 7, 2019 Author Posted July 7, 2019 most doctors treat women like sh*t and have trouble keeping their dicks in their pants, stay away ....not my q's
Author Mayaiana Posted July 7, 2019 Author Posted July 7, 2019 no, he answered your question. I DIDN'T AWSK YOU IF HE ANSWERED MY QS...and that's really nto your place to say since I"m the asker so thank you but no thank you
mortensorchid Posted July 7, 2019 Posted July 7, 2019 When someone tells you to take down your walls, you put more enforcement up on them. Personally, I think there are a lot of people out there (this guy included, as you said he's a doctor and he's probably a real a***** to know as a person) who like to pry secrets out of others and take them down with them. Avoid these people.
Author Mayaiana Posted July 7, 2019 Author Posted July 7, 2019 When someone tells you to take down your walls, you put more enforcement up on them. Personally, I think there are a lot of people out there (this guy included, as you said he's a doctor and he's probably a real a***** to know as a person) who like to pry secrets out of others and take them down with them. Avoid these people. what?! lol I honeswtly cant figure out what you people are thinking when answering...I'm simply asking why he says I have my walls up and you all are putting him down?! okay...
JEG88 Posted July 7, 2019 Posted July 7, 2019 My goodness, this is just like your other threads. If you want a certain answer and are just going to berate people for giving different opinions, then why even post anything? 3
Noproblem Posted July 7, 2019 Posted July 7, 2019 He is just a doctor, not a god. I don't understand the sheer excitement of a doctor flirting with a much younger nurse or a pre-med; it is definitely not the first time and definitely not the last time. Nothing special about it lol. If anything this guy will flirt with you, get in a relationship with you, distract you from your goals and then leave you or worst case scenario he won't leave you, but you will end up a stay home mom and he is the boss which is fine if that is your goal! So now don't be so defensive about it, he is not even your bf yet.
I'veseenbetterlol Posted July 7, 2019 Posted July 7, 2019 When someone tells you to take down your walls, you put more enforcement up on them. Personally, I think there are a lot of people out there (this guy included, as you said he's a doctor and he's probably a real a***** to know as a person) who like to pry secrets out of others and take them down with them. Avoid these people. I agree! Maybe not knowing the secrets, but def letting your guard down. When a man you just met tells you to trust him, don't. More then likely he is trying to get your walls down to get in your pants. 1
ExpatInItaly Posted July 7, 2019 Posted July 7, 2019 He sounds like self-important tool. He's just trying to mess with you head and make you think you are too shy or stuck-up. Ignore it. 2
basil67 Posted July 7, 2019 Posted July 7, 2019 The other posters are doing better than me - I can't even understand your question or even who said what. 3
Author Mayaiana Posted July 7, 2019 Author Posted July 7, 2019 I agree! Maybe not knowing the secrets' date=' but def letting your guard down. When a man you just met tells you to trust him, don't. More then likely he is trying to get your walls down to get in your pants.[/quote'] Right lol and we didn't just meet it's been 4 months....anyways....
Author Mayaiana Posted July 7, 2019 Author Posted July 7, 2019 He sounds like self-important tool. He's just trying to mess with you head and make you think you are too shy or stuck-up. Ignore it. Not true the least bit and what he's saying is true which is why I agreed, I'm always disagreeing with him or telling him he did something wrong...
JuneL Posted July 7, 2019 Posted July 7, 2019 He is just a doctor, not a god. I don't understand the sheer excitement of a doctor flirting with a much younger nurse or a pre-med; it is definitely not the first time and definitely not the last time. Nothing special about it lol. Sorry I didn’t see any flirting here. But it’s obvious the OP is attracted to the guy.
BaileyB Posted July 7, 2019 Posted July 7, 2019 it’s obvious the OP is attracted to the guy. Clearly. Although, I’m not sure why. OP, this guy does sound like a self-important tool. He’s baiting you and you are playing right along - much to his enjoyment, I’m sure...
stillafool Posted July 7, 2019 Posted July 7, 2019 It sounds like he likes submissive women and you aren't one.
PRW Posted July 7, 2019 Posted July 7, 2019 My take is going to be different than the others. I apologize in advance if it seems a little blunt, it is not my intention but it is the clearest way I can explain my point. I am trying to actually answer what you really asked along with some observations of what else I see in respect to your comments and what I have seen with other women on Corp environments. I found this strange I said yes because i'm powerful and it has to be equal and he has to respect me.With that attitude you are going to spend the rest of your life alone,...or end up settling for a weak whimpy "yes ma'am" Beta Male type. As soon as someone "thinks" they are "powerful" they no longer are, and respect has to be earned. You are headed for a life of disappointment and the people you don't think are not "up to your level" will be the ones in turn rejecting you. I met those women in the Corp world who are in positions of power over others who think everyone is their friend and that everyone loves them or at least likes them,...but when they leave the room everyone is secretly glad they left,...so don't be one of those. One of my female friends (that I consider a good one) is both a Doctor and also a Med School Prof at the same time. She is very accomplish. She has met a guy and they are doing very well. He is self employed and does well for himself but is by no means a PHD. I watch them together. They never seem to talk much about his work or hers when they are out with the rest of us. They always live in the moment and enjoy it. He seems to gently lead them as a couple, while she is gracious, shows humility, and has a great sense of humor. When you are around them you would never have a clue what they do for a living unless you ask them,...it just isn't a "thing" with them and they are a lot of fun to be around. They make you feel like there is yet hope for the world. he said yeahi Have my walls up too. I said then why are you telling me to put my walls down when yours are up? He said because I'm working on mine too. Why did he have this conversation with me? He also always smiles when talking to me, makes jokes etc.It is because he is a little further along in the process of getting it all together and having a more healthy view of reality and life. How he treats or doesn't treat women on dates or in a relationship isn't relevant to what you asked. Just because most doctors are alleged to be a certain way with women doesn't mean he is that way, but doesn't mean he isn't either. It is just a separate issue. 2
basil67 Posted July 7, 2019 Posted July 7, 2019 I'm going to work with PRW's interpretation. I can only underscore that humility is a desirable trait in both genders. Also, if one has to state that they are powerful, they probably aren't. A person who is truly powerful will exude that aura and everyone will know instinctively. 4
Foxhall Posted July 7, 2019 Posted July 7, 2019 well hes just expressing his frustration that you are not opening up to him as easily as he would like, I have found myself, girls who are very guarded or unwilling to open up,talk in codes rather than saying what is really on their mind, well it can be hard work to keep momentum going, if the other person is guarded i.e putting walls up- it becomes more difficult to get to know them - which makes it harder to build proper connection, In your case, I suspect it is definitely not shyness that is causing you to be guarded- it is more of a case of your own opinion of yourself- that you are an achiever yourself and that you are not going to open up to just any Joe Bloggs, perhaps let go of the power struggle a bit - the need to be in control- certainly if you want to gel with this guy -try to show your lighthearted side a bit more- find the fun as it were, maybe you would be better meeting someone who you do not work with, but again the advice would be the same, fair enough have a high opinion of yourself, but be willing to not take yourself as seriously, let your fun side out- do you need to win every argument- just go out to enjoy the company and have a few laughs, and if you want to really connect show some vulnerability. 1
DrNo1962 Posted July 8, 2019 Posted July 8, 2019 My take is going to be different than the others. I apologize in advance if it seems a little blunt, it is not my intention but it is the clearest way I can explain my point. I am trying to actually answer what you really asked along with some observations of what else I see in respect to your comments and what I have seen with other women on Corp environments. With that attitude you are going to spend the rest of your life alone,...or end up settling for a weak whimpy "yes ma'am" Beta Male type. As soon as someone "thinks" they are "powerful" they no longer are, and respect has to be earned. You are headed for a life of disappointment and the people you don't think are not "up to your level" will be the ones in turn rejecting you. I met those women in the Corp world who are in positions of power over others who think everyone is their friend and that everyone loves them or at least likes them,...but when they leave the room everyone is secretly glad they left,...so don't be one of those. One of my female friends (that I consider a good one) is both a Doctor and also a Med School Prof at the same time. She is very accomplish. She has met a guy and they are doing very well. He is self employed and does well for himself but is by no means a PHD. I watch them together. They never seem to talk much about his work or hers when they are out with the rest of us. They always live in the moment and enjoy it. He seems to gently lead them as a couple, while she is gracious, shows humility, and has a great sense of humor. When you are around them you would never have a clue what they do for a living unless you ask them,...it just isn't a "thing" with them and they are a lot of fun to be around. They make you feel like there is yet hope for the world. It is because he is a little further along in the process of getting it all together and having a more healthy view of reality and life. How he treats or doesn't treat women on dates or in a relationship isn't relevant to what you asked. Just because most doctors are alleged to be a certain way with women doesn't mean he is that way, but doesn't mean he isn't either. It is just a separate issue. I have to second this. Healthy men, in general, are looking for a girl who is flexible and generally has an easy going attitude. Feminine energy is about opening up, receiving love, relationship labels and the like. If he's telling OP to bring her walls down, he's essentially saying she's too much in her masculine. It might also be the case that the man is too much in his feminine and therefore causing OP to put her walls up. 1
basil67 Posted July 8, 2019 Posted July 8, 2019 For the record, lots of guys who are very masculine are also very open and receive love easily. It's not a 'feminine' thing.
DrNo1962 Posted July 8, 2019 Posted July 8, 2019 For the record, lots of guys who are very masculine are also very open and receive love easily. It's not a 'feminine' thing. You have to separate the aesthetic from the mindset. Masculine 'looking' men don't necessarily equate to a masculine mindset and vice versa with women.
basil67 Posted July 8, 2019 Posted July 8, 2019 Why do you think I'm confusing the aesthetic with the mindset? When I say "masculine", I'm thinking of guys who are 'men's men'. Abandons the women at a BBQ to hand out with the guys, popular with other men, would rather play football than watch a chick flick, not particularly stylish. Still quite capable of enjoying love and openness all that comes with it though.
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