metalbabble Posted July 10, 2019 Posted July 10, 2019 There's an understood trade off between online dating, and dating within your social sphere. With online dating, the stakes are lower, but so is overall quality. People are far less likely to take a chance on someone who doesn't immediately tick all boxes, and also many, many high quality people avoid online dating sites, so you miss that entire demographic. On the other side, you have social dating. Speaking for myself, I'm far more likely to land a higher quality date with someone I've met in person, where I am already socially proofed and can exude qualities that aren't apparent in a dating profile. So understanding that trade off brings me to a phenomenon that I'm not quite understanding.. and that is ghosting (or attempting to ghost) someone who you're most likely going to see again. While ghosting someone you met online is rude, it's just a reality we've all come to expect from online dating. It happens, it sucks, you move on. TWICE now, I've experienced a phenomenon where a person I've been intimate with, has failed to close the loop after I expressed continued interest in dating. I also inadvertently did this after a 1st date with someone who I didn't realize had mutual friends. This is a bad idea, folks. Why? Because, male or female, you're going to get burned. Guys: You're going to come off looking like a huge flake. A jilted girl will pull no punches. You will get trashed and trashed hard until you're out of her system. Just man up and pull the plug. Ladies: A man you ghost will often go out of his way to prove he's not intimidated by you ignoring him. Expect him to inject himself into your mutual social sphere with added gusto. Does this make you uncomfortable? That's entirely the point. People... DO NOT GHOST IF YOU WILL SEE THEM AGAIN. /thread
chillii Posted July 11, 2019 Posted July 11, 2019 Just because you go through certain stuff and weird shyt happens to you, doesn't entitle assuming everyone else has and gets and does all that same stuff. Who knows what you do how you come across what cause and effects set off what but somethings wrong with it that's for sure . Sounds like you need to tidy up your own back yard and look inward first to me before lecturing over the internet .
DrNo1962 Posted July 11, 2019 Posted July 11, 2019 Just out of curiosity, did you reach out to him after your date and he never responded until several days later (or never at all) or... Are you sitting by the phone waiting for him to initiate contact?
kendahke Posted July 11, 2019 Posted July 11, 2019 People are going to ghost if they don't feel any sort of a connection with you--doesn't matter what you feel for them or what you're constructing in your imagination with them... heck, some people have been ghosted after months of dating and supposedly growing closer to one another. Ghosting is an option that some people are going to take. Just because it's primarily an online occurrence doesn't mean that that person can't take online behavior and apply it to real life involvements. There is no guarantee in life that the person you're interested in is capable of or cares to maintain the interest or even reciprocating it--moreover wanting to reciprocate it. Sucks, but there it is.
Trail Blazer Posted July 11, 2019 Posted July 11, 2019 What a weirdly specific thread. As the poster above stated, just don't ghost people, period!
Recommended Posts