Val2020 Posted July 2, 2019 Posted July 2, 2019 (edited) Hello all. I'm really needing some advice about some relationship problems I am having. I am in a long term, on and off relationship with my High School Sweetheart and in my early twenties. Like young couple often do, we have had a lot of turbulence in our relationship. About a year ago we went through a rough patch which ended up in my then fiance ending the relationship to be with another woman. Though I was devastated at the time, it did seem to be for the best because our lives seem to be headed into two different directions with me focusing on school and a career and him partying as a young soldier way too much but simultaneously rushing me into a marriage that neither one of us really were or are ready for. A few months later he apparently made a mistake and felt that he regretted leaving me for someone else and their short relationship ultimately ended. He begged and pleaded for me to give him another chance and though I was already seeing someone else, I decided to try again with him probably because we had so much history. Things were mostly good for a few months besides me seeing missed calls from the women he left me for which didn't sit well with me. Things have been rocky over the past few months but nothing super drastic or out of the usual since giving the relationship another chance. My only problem now is he is pushing for marriage and not only do I not truly feel ready, but I also harbor so much resentment, anger, and insecurity from being betrayed by him in the past. I feel disgusted when I see someone who looks like her, even though we slightly look alike and overall I just feel extremely self-conscious now for every reason. Though he has put in a lot of effort to mend things, I can't truly say that I have gotten over the whole situation which I have explained. There are certain parts that I can't get over such as him posting pictures online of them together a week after we broke up and money mysteriously missing from my bank account at the time of our separation. Its been a while but I feel more lost than ever and don't want to be blinded by love and memories into a life long mistake. Edited July 2, 2019 by a LoveShack.org Moderator Clarify title; add paragraphs
d0nnivain Posted July 2, 2019 Posted July 2, 2019 get some pre-marital counseling before you get re-engaged. If he's a soldier, the military offers this service. He's probably scared about leaving you home without a ring on your finger. In the military it is much easier for you to get services if you are married; they won't do anything for a GF.
Kelliousme Posted July 3, 2019 Posted July 3, 2019 You should NEVER have taken him back after he cheated on you. You guys were engaged and he left you for another woman. He does not love you. And look what you're facing now. Trust will always be an issue. I'm one of those who believes "once a cheater always a cheater" because if he is able to cheat on you once then he'll be able to cheat on you again. Yeah I know it's hard to get rid of him with all the memories/experiences with him esp if he's your High School sweetheart. But do you really want to waste your life with this guy? You want to waste MORE time on this guy? Who cheated on you? When you guys were engaged? Knowing it hurts you but still posted pics of him and his new gf on social media? And possibly stole your money? AND seems like he's still in contact with this ex. Do yourself a favor and dump this guy. If you don't venture out there and let go of this guy you don't know what you're missing out on. Especially when this high school sweet heart of yours is not that sweet at all. 1
Recommended Posts