Jexur Posted June 18, 2019 Posted June 18, 2019 (edited) Hello, Ok, so here is my story. I have always been a loner. I always avoided people and parties and bars. I thought I liked it that way (and I did -- I felt extremely happy all alone by myself in front of a computer with internet). Back between 2012 to 2014, I bought bitcoins (and few other cryptos) for a few thousand dollars -- about $10K to $20K total. When the prices went crazy in late 2017, I started selling some of them. Just in a few months, my bank account was up by several million dollars. So I can say I am a millionaire. It's been two years. One thing that didn't change however is loneliness. it's not hard to find strippers, porn, and hookers but usually most days I am all alone driving my fancy car to a restaurant or theater. I used to like it that way, but I am not that sure anymore. I don't know what changed. Is it money? More free time? Or is it this one woman I am infatuated with at work. If I ask her if she wants to go skydiving or Disney world, or something, she always says yes that would be fun, but then I make no plans as I am not sure. Does she see me just a friend? I don't know. I want to bang her Obviously, I lack confidence and fear rejection. I have to say money is way overrated. I often feel depressed and anxious which I rarely felt before when I was working full-time for a paycheck (not work as a hobby as I do now). I loved to work overtime, long hours, and I loved to make money so that I could buy things. Now I can buy things without having to work for it, but I feel like I don't need anything. I buy all kinds of clothes and shoes and end up donating them a few weeks later. It's like life has no purpose. Even things like I used to enjoy like playing chess, I don't anymore. Weird. I must say money is overrated. Do women prefer rich guys? How would they even know if someone is really rich anyway? You can lease cars and fake it easy. Only close friends and coworkers know I made a ****load of money. Most people won't even know Edited June 18, 2019 by Jexur 1
MaleIntuition Posted June 18, 2019 Posted June 18, 2019 The good old classic: “Money can’t buy you happiness” huh? When your basic needs are taken care off and you no longer have to worry about money, the correlation between money and happiness more or less stops. I don’t think your current loneliness has much or anything to do with having money though, it’s probably more a consequence of growing up. Your friends are starting families and your old hobbies aren’t as engaging as they used to be. Normal stuffs. Sounds like you need to practice your dating game. Rejection is always a possibility and if you want to date - you will always risk rejection. Ask that coworker out for a couple of drinks! In a way, the fear of being rejected is worse than the actual rejection. So - do women like money? Hm... Perhaps you should ask yourself if you really want a women whom like your money more than she likes you? 1
Amy1992 Posted June 18, 2019 Posted June 18, 2019 Do women prefer rich guys? How would they even know if someone is really rich anyway? You can lease cars and fake it easy. Only close friends and coworkers know I made a ****load of money. Most people won't even know Before you made that money didn't you have dreams about what you would do if you were rich? Some people only dream about how they will spend their money. What car they'll buy, what clothes, what house. Then maybe once they have all those things it wakes them up to their own general lack of vision and imagination that they weren't aware of when they didn't have money and therefore had clear goals (make money, get out of debt). Is there some sort of business you could start that you would vow to only invest a certain amount of money in (so that if the business started to fail you wouldn't bail it out)? Maybe you would feel more fulfilled if you created or built something yourself which was profitable rather than hoping to find happiness by spending money that came to you as a result of other people's visions and hard work. To your question about women, It's inevitable that some women, if they find out you have millions, will cosy up because they want you to spend some of it on them. Some men too. And scammers, salespeople and so on. There are lots of people out there who will really like you a lot on account of your bank balance. Just so long as they think there's a chance of you sharing some of it with them. That's just inevitable. You don't even need to be rich for it to happen. You just need to have cash in the bank that people think you'll be easily separated from. Besides the "I might get something out of this person" motive, women are often attracted to wealthy men for the same reason that men want to be their friend. Because of power. Not the power that comes from money, but the power within them that made it in the first place. And other qualities like discipline, motivation, having a vision and so on. Traits people admire. You made a good investment and got lucky. That's not the same thing as having a vision, making it become a reality and becoming rich as a result. I'm not knocking your good fortune. You were smart to make that investment and potentially you could have a very good life. But I can understand why you feel a bit empty about it. 1
Marty7787 Posted June 18, 2019 Posted June 18, 2019 Money does not matter to decent women. I wouldn't be too flash while you're trying to date, you will only attract the wrong sort and it can't put of some of the decent women too. Just try random things, just see what is on in the area and go, I tried this and met loads of cool new people that now I hang out with, it boosts your confidence (people know it's hard to start something new, so they will be really welcoming). Something like a salsa dance class, majority of people go by themselves, you interact one on one with plenty of women through the night. always loads of new people that come for a few weeks to try. I would just try and meet new people, make some friends, boost your confidence. Plenty of people will be in the same situation. 1
Logo Posted June 18, 2019 Posted June 18, 2019 I wouldn't jump into dating to boost your confidence. You would be doing the exact opposite if you did that and there is a high chance someone will suck it out of you in a matter of weeks. Cunning people come in all shapes and forms and a person is most vulnerable when emotions and intimacy are on the line. You first need to socialize with people. Hide your money and wealth as best you can. The more you socialize, the more confident you will become. Then women won't seem to be so intimidating. They will be just another person you're speaking with. Then dating will come naturally. 4
d0nnivain Posted June 18, 2019 Posted June 18, 2019 Before you had money you had no skills with women, or people. You deluded yourself into thinking you were OK by yourself. It was a protective lie designed to make you not feel bad about being alone. You told yourself it was a choice. But while you were making that choice, you failed to develop skills to make a friend or a GF. Now you think the sheer size of your bank account & your fancy sports car will compensate for your social shortcomings. While the flashy car may get you a 2nd glance, beyond that look, if there is no substance you will not succeed in overcoming your loneliness. Forget your money for a minute. Work on interpersonal development. To get a friend, you have to be a friend. Join some organization & volunteer somewhere to help others. It is in giving that we receive. I'm not talking about writing a check. I'm talking about you showing up, rolling up your sleeves & pitching in. What you do doesn't matter as long as you care about the subject: work on a political campaign, rescue animals, support the arts, raise $$ to cure disease, serve at a soup kitchen. Stop trying to impress women by offering to take them skydiving or to Disney on a 1st date. That is way over the top & off putting. Instead, since you have the dough, do something like take the Dale Carnegie class How to Win Friends & Influence People or something like that so you can get a better foundation on how to interact with other people & develop relationships. 3
alphamale Posted June 18, 2019 Posted June 18, 2019 Do women prefer rich guys? yes, the attractive ones do...
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted June 18, 2019 Posted June 18, 2019 Volunteer! You may meet some nice ladies, and it will give your life more "purpose" that you seek. 2
alphamale Posted June 18, 2019 Posted June 18, 2019 Volunteer! You may meet some nice ladies, and it will give your life more "purpose" that you seek. better yet start a charity that helps sick children, you'll have broads all over you like white on rice 1
Author Jexur Posted June 18, 2019 Author Posted June 18, 2019 better yet start a charity that helps sick children, you'll have broads all over you like white on rice Don't people say the same thing about being rich? In the end, the guy has to initiate and ask and actually go out. Women won't ask first. No matter how rich you are or how many charities you do to help children. Even when a woman asks first (which is rare -- usually women would just look and smile to show interest) I usually back off. So I bought this chick (another co-worker), a gift for her upcoming birthday, and she asks me to let's go and get tattoos on her birthday, emphasizing, "just you and me." My response was hell no, I don't want tattoos on my body. So there. I always back off. So really charities and money really won't do anything if the guy isn't initiating. And if someone is initiating a lot and going out, I think they get "broads all over" regardless of their status/wealth/job. That's my experience.
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted June 18, 2019 Posted June 18, 2019 Why are you so opposed to initiating? I'm cracking up about the tattoos.....yeah, that was a pretty odd request! 1
Author Jexur Posted June 18, 2019 Author Posted June 18, 2019 Why are you so opposed to initiating? I think I already answered that in the first post. Probably because I fear rejection. I am used to be a loner, and as I said, I used to love it. I used to love working --60+ hours -- because I loved making money, and spending free time online on a computer. Only other friends I had were chess players from chess club. Now I don't work that much, and I have money and time, but nothing much to do. Yeah, I could travel (which I do sometimes) and go places, but it's usually by myself.
elaine567 Posted June 18, 2019 Posted June 18, 2019 May be an odd request but it was something he could have built upon instead of "Hell no" "I don't want a tattoo but I'll come with you for support" Or "No tattoo for me but how about I meet you for a drink/ coffee/[insert activity of choice]" 3
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted June 18, 2019 Posted June 18, 2019 I think I already answered that in the first post. Probably because I fear rejection. So you're like everyone else . 2
alphamale Posted June 18, 2019 Posted June 18, 2019 why don't you spend some of that money on a socialization coach to help you. a good psychiatrist could also help you with anxiety medication? 5
Marty7787 Posted June 18, 2019 Posted June 18, 2019 Yeah, I could travel (which I do sometimes) and go places, but it's usually by myself. Travel, It'll give you something to talk about when you go on dates, as far as I can tell, you have actually missed out on an awful lot. I'd take 6 months out and just travel, go through Europe, South America, Asia, etc. Stay in hostels. just meet as many people as possible and share experiences with someone else. It'll change your perspective on life, give you social skills, confidence. etc I always go to places on my own, It's fantastic, do what you want, when you want. You're in a position financially most of us would only dream off. Use it to your advantage while you have the chance. You will not regret it. 2
Gretchen12 Posted June 18, 2019 Posted June 18, 2019 Ok so you won money in the lottery or by gambling. What are you saying in this thread? Why do you associate women with money? Are you saying you thought with money you could buy women like buying fancy cars? You even mentioned hookers. Your post is extremely insulting to women. 2
chillii Posted June 18, 2019 Posted June 18, 2019 yeah l can't work it out either and if you liked that one enough to get her a present you should've gone along , be with her while she gets her tattoo who cares. Anyway so what were you saying you don't like asking women out or ? As for the loot , you don't want a woman that's only interested because of money anyway. A friend of mines rich and single and he actually hides it when he meets someone, paranoid as all hell about being used . Strangest thing is to me , l was really really comfortable for awhile back when and also drive a very very nice car which although l dressed the same as always l suppose nice cars are a bit of a give away. Funniest thing was though . l actually got much more attention from much nicer girls back when l was broke. l sort of felt like a bit of an alien with money or especially stepping out of this car. l actually had a much better life before all that and just got out and about in ordinary down to earth ways and easily just met people naturally. The money thing changed all that though , dunno if that's what your getting at. lifes back to normal these days financially , even tough at times , but l think l prefer it.
elaine567 Posted June 18, 2019 Posted June 18, 2019 I guess when he was poor he had a nice loner life but a life with a purpose. He probably convinced himself the "chicks" weren't coming for him to "bang" because he was poor. Now he is rich the "chicks" are still not falling over themselves and he realises he has to actually "do" something to attract women... Who knew? 7
alphamale Posted June 18, 2019 Posted June 18, 2019 I guess when he was poor he had a nice loner life but a life with a purpose. He probably convinced himself the "chicks" weren't coming for him to "bang" because he was poor. Now he is rich the "chicks" are still not falling over themselves and he realises he has to actually "do" something to attract women... Who knew? superb observation elaine567 2
fairyfloff Posted June 18, 2019 Posted June 18, 2019 lets go travel together.. feeling quite lost myself past few months 2
Tamfana Posted June 18, 2019 Posted June 18, 2019 It sounds as though you just need a new purpose in life and now you’re in the perfect position to do something meaningful or even just pleasurable or personally challenging. (Might want to knock Everest off the list. Overcrowded. Ha.) If you don’t want to attract the money-obsessed, don’t buy flashy things and keep quiet about your wealth. Plenty of wealthy people do that. Heck, Warren Buffett still lives in the house he bought in the 1950’s. People who are quiet about their wealth don’t fear being taken advantage of. 2
Author Jexur Posted June 18, 2019 Author Posted June 18, 2019 Ok so you won money in the lottery or by gambling. . I didn't win money in a lottery and gambling. I invested it, more than $20,000, in very risky things and could have lost it. That's a lot of money to risk for someone like me who loves money and worked hard for it. I do not gamble, as I had some confidence in what I was doing, as my major is computer science, but yes it was risky, but I don't do gambling if by gambling you mean casinos.
oceanblue12 Posted June 18, 2019 Posted June 18, 2019 Jexur anything that involves a lot of money is risky in theory.....for my perspective money has the opposite effect of what you might think... it seems to be a deterrent to many women I am not quite sure why 1
preraph Posted June 18, 2019 Posted June 18, 2019 I think you should start smaller than dating women and just start trying to make male friends you are comfortable going out and socializing with. Get comfortable being social. And since you are very inexperienced, I'm just going to let you know that women in real life act nothing like women in porn, so don't start expecting that they will. You are behind the curve socially, so you just need to start being social and then once you are able to do that, it will be a lot easier to not get rejected. 4
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