Jamturk Posted June 15, 2019 Posted June 15, 2019 Hi guys I'm a 48 year old man, I was in near year long relationship with a 48 year old lady who I love dearly. She suddenly dumped me after a minor tiff stating that she thought that there was no point continuing in a relationship that was heading in her opinion for disaster. I was totally blindsided by this and truly don't understand how she could give up on a warm, loving relationship over such trivia. I asked to meet in person to discuss and allow me some closure but she refuses. p.s I'm willing to answer any questions. we have now been in no contact for 2 weeks. Can anyone shed some light?
Author Jamturk Posted June 15, 2019 Author Posted June 15, 2019 Yes, Her son was playing in a footy tournament and i thought I would drop by and show my support. I was ringing and ringing and she did'nt pick up I as concerned. I went to the place anyway and saw her and her son outside the stadium. I was looking for a space and rang her again, she looked at her phone and never answered. I parked up and went to them and asked why she was'nt picking up her phone. Nothing happened there but she said I had a face on which I accept as I was a little pised off that she was ignoring my calls.
FMW Posted June 15, 2019 Posted June 15, 2019 It seems her idea of a minor tiff might not be the same as yours. Can you summarize what that tiff was about?
ExpatInItaly Posted June 15, 2019 Posted June 15, 2019 Yes, Her son was playing in a footy tournament and i thought I would drop by and show my support. I was ringing and ringing and she did'nt pick up I as concerned. I went to the place anyway and saw her and her son outside the stadium. I was looking for a space and rang her again, she looked at her phone and never answered. I parked up and went to them and asked why she was'nt picking up her phone. Had she invited you to come to this tournament? How do you know she actually looked at her phone when you called?
FMW Posted June 15, 2019 Posted June 15, 2019 My guess is she had other issues she just hadn't discussed with you and you hadn't picked up on them. What you explained doesn't seem like enough to blow up an almost one year relationship.
Author Jamturk Posted June 15, 2019 Author Posted June 15, 2019 My guess is she had other issues she just hadn't discussed with you and you hadn't picked up on them. What you explained doesn't seem like enough to blow up an almost one year relationship. My thoughts entirely, and something I said to her in the breakup.
Author Jamturk Posted June 15, 2019 Author Posted June 15, 2019 Had she invited you to come to this tournament? Yes, but I did'nt commit because /iknew I had to work that day. On the day itself I had an hour spare before work and thought it would be a nice surprise for them to pass through. How do you know she actually looked at her phone when you called? I could see her from where I was phoning from.
Author Jamturk Posted June 15, 2019 Author Posted June 15, 2019 What really hurts is her refusal to see me face 2 face to breakup. Apparently 1 year of loving does'nt warrant that.
LivingWaterPlease Posted June 15, 2019 Posted June 15, 2019 It sounds as if since she didn't pick up her phone she didn't want to talk with you right then. She may have thought when you showed up you were forcing the issue. She may have been dealing with things with her son she wasn't ready for you to be a part of. Then when you showed up you would be part of things she didn't want you involved in. 1
JuneL Posted June 15, 2019 Posted June 15, 2019 Some possibilities: -You showed up uninvited and made a scene in front of everyone there; -Something about you bothered her or she has lost interest. She had been waiting for a good excuse to break up with you.
elaine567 Posted June 15, 2019 Posted June 15, 2019 Do you make a habit of turning up unexpectedly and blowing up her phone. Does she see it as you checking up on her? 1
Author Jamturk Posted June 15, 2019 Author Posted June 15, 2019 Do you make a habit of turning up unexpectedly and blowing up her phone. Does she see it as you checking up on her? No, Never. It really was'nt like that. 1
Mrin Posted June 15, 2019 Posted June 15, 2019 My guess is that she was done done and this tiff wasn't the reason for the breakup. It was just the catalyst. She sounds done. Move along.
The Outlaw Posted June 15, 2019 Posted June 15, 2019 It's entirely possible she wasn't feeling the same way that you were about her. Some people may just look to date without ever really getting serious, and she could have had a bad breakup or marriage fall apart before that may have led to commitment issues. And she may have just been afraid of confrontation given her reaction. Maintain the NC and move on.
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