brooke7777 Posted September 25, 2005 Share Posted September 25, 2005 Today was just one of those bad days. I woke up feeling sad and cried the whole way to work. At about 11:00, I started feeling really horrible. I called my mom to try to have her talk some sense into me, but I it just ended up making things worse. I guess it was the final straw that set me over the edge. It still seems so unimaginable that I am no longer with him. We've had almost 2 1/2 weeks of no contact, but I wake up everyday thinking, "When is he going to call?" I was supposed to go out to a bar with some friends tonight, but I've opted to stay home. Emotionally, I don't think I am ready for that whole scene. I haven't been out to a bar without him or without knowing that I will come home to him in over 3 years. So...basically it's giving me a whole lot of anxiety. It's so hard still. One day I feel ok, not good, but ok, and the next I have a day like today, when all I want to do is call him. Ever wonder where all of the tears come from? I think I've cried more in the past month than I have my entire life. Hopefully tomorrow will be better. Link to post Share on other sites
johan Posted September 25, 2005 Share Posted September 25, 2005 Brooke, you sound sad. You also sound pretty healthy and not too angry. I know it hurts, but it will get better. If this guy can't come through for you, then I'm sure something better is coming. Keep in mind you're 23, and you have tons of time. You should go with your friends. Even if you're bummed out, it will be better for you than staying home and thinking too much. Link to post Share on other sites
Author brooke7777 Posted September 25, 2005 Author Share Posted September 25, 2005 I do try to go out with friends, but tonight was just one of those nights where I was in no mental state to be around people. I opted for a long run and then a trip to Target...I may have spent way too much money, but at least it made me feel a little better. Thinking is definitely something I have done too much today. Thanks for the advice, johan! Link to post Share on other sites
hoppy28 Posted September 25, 2005 Share Posted September 25, 2005 i have those nights aswell. sometimes we all need "alone" time even if its on a friday or saturday night. i did the very same thing lastnight. there was a party in town. i opted to stay home and watch acouple movies. i just didnt feel up to it........and the fact that she probably was going to be there also helped with the decision. its ok to feel this way.........just keep in your mind your not alone. the bar scene is not for everyone. its not for me. although going out now and then can be fun.........i personally find the bar scene alittle grimey. the older i get the more i feel "out of place". its hard to meet people or more importantly get to know someone in these types of enviroments. im not saying you cant or wont. its just my personal experience. be strong kid.........time will pass and youll fell stronger i promise. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts