lifeonmars93 Posted June 11, 2019 Posted June 11, 2019 I used Grindr (gay dating app) pretending to be my boyfriend to see if there are any recent guys he slept with (I know, it’s wrong). I text a guy and send “my” pictures. He replies “We have met before”. I then ask, when? And he says “You suc*** me off two weeks ago. In your car”. My heart was racing and I wanted to die. I continue the conversation and say, since there were no pictures of this guy, “are you sure it was so recently? Which car was it?”. He says “an estate car”. Guys, my boyfriend does not have an estate car, he’s got a tiny corsa… I send a picture of the model of the car and the guy confirms it wasn’t that car. I should have stopped but I’m tormented. I mean, what is the chance of someone mistaking my boyfriend for someone else, claiming he had suc*** them off, as I show them his pictures? Should I break up with him notwithstanding the car discrepancy? Thank you. I’m in pieces to be honest.
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted June 11, 2019 Posted June 11, 2019 Is your boyfriend even gay? Are you a man? If no, this is pretty cruel. Has he given you a reason to not trust him?
Author lifeonmars93 Posted June 11, 2019 Author Posted June 11, 2019 Is your boyfriend even gay? Are you a man? If no, this is pretty cruel. Has he given you a reason to not trust him? He's gay and I'm a man, of course. He hasn't given me any reasons in the past. But this guy on Grindr saw his pictures and immediately claimed they hooked up so recently? However the car description doesn't match... That's why I really don't know what to do
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted June 11, 2019 Posted June 11, 2019 He's gay and I'm a man, of course. He hasn't given me any reasons in the past. But this guy on Grindr saw his pictures and immediately claimed they hooked up so recently? However the car description doesn't match... That's why I really don't know what to do Well, he could have been telling the truth and your guy just looks like someone he hooked up with. Or he could have been a little weirded about by your grilling questions so lied. If you must try to catch him in lying to you, why not just wait until someone messages "you" on the app instead of going to look for needles in haystacks?
Author lifeonmars93 Posted June 11, 2019 Author Posted June 11, 2019 Well, he could have been telling the truth and your guy just looks like someone he hooked up with. Or he could have been a little weirded about by your grilling questions so lied. If you must try to catch him in lying to you, why not just wait until someone messages "you" on the app instead of going to look for needles in haystacks? I messaged him first because this is how it works on Grindr. I didn't have a profile pic and neither did the guy that I messaged. I send the pics and asks how he's doing; then he replies we have met before, 2 weeks ago, etc. Then I go, you sure so recently? Which car was that? Since the guy wasn't showing a picture I felt authorized to ask for details to understand if he really met "me". So, not sure if this guy lied about the car; I can't find a reason why he would?
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted June 11, 2019 Posted June 11, 2019 I messaged him first because this is how it works on Grindr. I didn't have a profile pic and neither did the guy that I messaged. I send the pics and asks how he's doing; then he replies we have met before, 2 weeks ago, etc. Then I go, you sure so recently? Which car was that? Since the guy wasn't showing a picture I felt authorized to ask for details to understand if he really met "me". So, not sure if this guy lied about the car; I can't find a reason why he would? Oh ok. That clears it up a little. What made you message him if he didn't have a pic? How many people have you messaged?
Author lifeonmars93 Posted June 11, 2019 Author Posted June 11, 2019 Oh ok. That clears it up a little. What made you message him if he didn't have a pic? How many people have you messaged? I messaged him because his age and sexual preferences matched with what my bf likes. I've messaged hundreds of people by now.
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted June 11, 2019 Posted June 11, 2019 I've messaged hundreds of people by now. If he's the only "hit" you've gotten, I'd advise you to stop. It was probably a case of mistaken identity or he had some other motive for saying you'd already met.
d0nnivain Posted June 11, 2019 Posted June 11, 2019 You don't trust your BF & that is the heart of your problem. Whatever it was that made you resort to on line subterfuge, go talk to your BF about it. Gay, straight, bi or trying to figure it out . . . two people can't interact on most levels & absolutely not on a romantic one without TRUST. If your guy is cheating kick him to the curb. Nobody deserves to be cheated on.
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