googlicious Posted June 10, 2019 Posted June 10, 2019 So this girl im hooking up with exclusively, i told her im having feelings for her and she confessed the same. The next day she was depressed/distant and after we hooked up, still the same and left hurry. We both know because of our situation relationship is not feasible. I kinda told her i dont wanna get too involved and too hurt so maybe we should break it off, and she more or less rejected the idea. I don't know what to think about all this. In addition, (this is rather too personal but...) she lets me orgasm inside, without contraceptives (still avoiding the ovulation cycle)- which in the past for me has always been reserved for women who were jumping in relationship with me. Once again, Im confused. Thanks..
Redhead14 Posted June 10, 2019 Posted June 10, 2019 Once again, Im confused. That's an understatement . . . You're also irresponsible/reckless -- "orgasm inside her" without contraceptives -- paleeze!!! 1
d0nnivain Posted June 10, 2019 Posted June 10, 2019 Why isn't a relationship possible? I agree that you are playing Russian Roulette with your unsafe sexual practices & the loser will be the baby you inadvertently create. The rhythm method of BC is the least effective contraceptive out there. Plus if she's willing to have unprotected sex with you & you with her, do you realize that you are both having sex with every single person you have both been intimate with? That is a lot of possible ways to get an STD.
Redhead14 Posted June 10, 2019 Posted June 10, 2019 He doesn't want a relationship. He is playing with her . . . she wants him to be her boyfriend, he knows it (and I might guess that the whole no contraceptives thing is about trapping him).
d0nnivain Posted June 10, 2019 Posted June 10, 2019 He doesn't want a relationship. He is playing with her . . . she wants him to be her boyfriend, he knows it (and I might guess that the whole no contraceptives thing is about trapping him). Makes sense.
Author googlicious Posted June 10, 2019 Author Posted June 10, 2019 I kind of expected the sort of responses thats above this one. Loveshack used to be such a supportive place with positive mindset but now all i see is negetivity and toxicity from people who think criticism is the only worthawhile advice there is. Or maybe its because thats all they know to do from being judgemental and bitter. Thank you.
d0nnivain Posted June 10, 2019 Posted June 10, 2019 I want to be supportive. That is why I asked why you can't be in a relationship But the unprotected sex thing . . . it presents to many possible problems. If you can't be in a relationship with this woman, what do you think is going to happen if she gets pregnant? A child will keep you two connected Forever. You confessed to having feelings. She reacted somewhat negatively to that. Not rejection negatively but depressed dejected. Do you want her to have feelings for you too? Do you want a relationship? Have you told her that? 1
Author googlicious Posted June 10, 2019 Author Posted June 10, 2019 I want to be supportive. That is why I asked why you can't be in a relationship But the unprotected sex thing . . . it presents to many possible problems. If you can't be in a relationship with this woman, what do you think is going to happen if she gets pregnant? A child will keep you two connected Forever. You confessed to having feelings. She reacted somewhat negatively to that. Not rejection negatively but depressed dejected. Do you want her to have feelings for you too? Do you want a relationship? Have you told her that? She came here for work and leaving the country soon and we already ruled out long distance relationship. But yeah, i want her to fall for me so we can figure something out even if its something dramatic.
d0nnivain Posted June 10, 2019 Posted June 10, 2019 Step one: talk to an immigration lawyer. Understand what is involved. Then find out if she wants to stay. You may be the fun foreign fling while she's here & she may be sad about going back. Don't rule out her wanting an anchor baby. Have protected sex until you figure out where you stand.
lurker74 Posted June 10, 2019 Posted June 10, 2019 Of course you're confused. Listen, even in this day and age, sex is going to cause most non-sociopathic people to catch feelings. This is doubly true for women since sex provides them with an even more powerful cocktail of hormones than it does men. It's been designed for ~200,000 years to convince both parties to stay with each other and raise several children, thereby passing on their genes, which is biology's ultimate scorecard. And with the whole non-contraceptive method, you are playing right into that history of humanity. By the way, in your case, about 1 out of every 10 times you have sex, you are likely to fertilize an egg of hers (assuming you are both fertile). And yet you both insist that it's just fun. You can do that. But we've only had about 60 years of times where sex was about fun without (many) consequences...that's how long the pill has been around. Prior to that, every time you had sex, you were potentially creating a child. Then you tell her you have feelings and she reciprocates and you're all confused. Just figure out what you want from a relationship and do that. Otherwise, buy some condoms so that she doesn't have to return to her home country with a fatherless baby. Do that for your potential baby if not for yourself. 1
smackie9 Posted June 10, 2019 Posted June 10, 2019 Just letting you know, sperm can survive as long as 7 to 9 days in a woman. They hide in the tissue dormant to protect themselves until that egg drops down. She's going to get pregnant if she isn't already. You want answers? Clear concise honest communication with her.
Foxhall Posted June 10, 2019 Posted June 10, 2019 Based on your information as given it does not seem that confusing to me, this girl wants a boyfriend/ relationship, you want a casual fling, she becomes distant with you because your not showing the relationship love to her, quite likely as the others point out she is trying to trap you with a pregnancy, so look it seems a simple decision you either commit to her and make a go of it or you end it now. perhaps your coming around slowly to the relationship possibility? 1
frus69 Posted June 11, 2019 Posted June 11, 2019 (edited) I dont care how F'ed up you two are but please when she falls pregnant and gives birth to your kids, dont ruin his/her life. Dont let the child pay the price of your recklessness Edited June 11, 2019 by frus69
Author googlicious Posted June 11, 2019 Author Posted June 11, 2019 Based on your information as given it does not seem that confusing to me, this girl wants a boyfriend/ relationship, you want a casual fling, she becomes distant with you because your not showing the relationship love to her, quite likely as the others point out she is trying to trap you with a pregnancy, so look it seems a simple decision you either commit to her and make a go of it or you end it now. perhaps your coming around slowly to the relationship possibility? Its the opposite actually. Im the one chasing and shes the one backing away
smackie9 Posted June 11, 2019 Posted June 11, 2019 Its the opposite actually. Im the one chasing and shes the one backing away To be desirable is to be unavailable.
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