Kitty Tantrum Posted June 8, 2019 Posted June 8, 2019 Pretty much the only people I keep in my life in any substantial capacity are precisely the sorts of people who grouse about the impropriety of early morning/late night social calls. There are very few people who are allowed to get away with calling or texting at all hours. There pretty much has to be a familial or contractual tie somewhere, or I'd better already be head over heels for you, otherwise no you are not so entitled. I know people don't see texting/messaging as being the same - but when it is SO TYPICALLY used in the same fashion (with many people expecting a prompt response), and so admittedly in lieu of the telephone, I feel perfectly justified grousing about it. I likes me some old fashioned sensibilities.
Art_Critic Posted June 8, 2019 Posted June 8, 2019 While I wouldn't send a text before 8am to anyone I don't know I routinely send texts earlier than 7.. I get to work at 6:30 so all my texts are work/family oriented. If I got a text from someone early it wouldn't bother me.. Like GorillaTheatre said, as long as a reply is okay later in the day.. So if he gets upset you didn't reply at 7:10am then you kick him to the curb but otherwise reply when you have time.. 2
Curiousroxy86 Posted June 8, 2019 Posted June 8, 2019 Met a guy on a dating website, after a few messages exchanged phone numbers. I got a text from him at seven in the morning. Would you consider it a sign of someone who is disrespectful or inconsiderate? Or should I not get my panties tied in a wad over this? Fix your undies girl lol Trust me when it comes to dating you will have reason to be upset/offended This is just not one of them Simply respond when is a convenient time for you 3
JuneL Posted June 8, 2019 Posted June 8, 2019 For me, it would be the other way round. If some guy I’m dating told me he’s bothered by receiving a text at 7am, that would scream high maintenance. I would wonder if he didn’t know how to mute his phone, whether he didn’t have friends or had not worked with others in completely different time zones, whether he’s one of those inflexible ones who always expect a text to be responded immediately, or whether he has a very late schedule on a weekday...
Foxhall Posted June 8, 2019 Posted June 8, 2019 hardly a deal breaker, at least you know he'll be raring to go first thing
emeraldgreen Posted June 8, 2019 Posted June 8, 2019 7am is a bit keen, but just reply at 10am and it will eventually send the message that you're ready for contact after a certain time. 1
Cersei Posted June 8, 2019 Posted June 8, 2019 I text people all the time at 7am before the chaos of my work day begins. They see it when they see it. They reply when they reply. I get all kinds of texts while I am in bed. My phone has this button on the side that you push down at bedtime. You use it to turn down the volume! I don't think the OP has reason to be angry at all. 1
salparadise Posted June 8, 2019 Posted June 8, 2019 Considering your other criteria for a BF https://www.loveshack.org/forums/mind-body-soul/sexual-reproductive-health-practices/681584-i-m-size-queen-nympho-should-i-put-my-dating-profile maybe what time this guy texts you should be a non-issue At least until she knows what he's working with, eh?. You are so constrained . My first thought was maybe he's trying to show off his morning enthusiasm. Gives y'all a glimpse into what it's like to be a guy –– damned if you do, damned if you don't.
Curiousroxy86 Posted June 8, 2019 Posted June 8, 2019 Good God that thread was entertaining to read 2
beentheredonethat77 Posted June 9, 2019 Posted June 9, 2019 I pick my battles -- i have enough filters in place than to worry about what time a guy texts me.. if I otherwise like him, my thinking is "at least he IS texting" 2
guest569 Posted June 9, 2019 Posted June 9, 2019 I text people all the time at 7am before the chaos of my work day begins. They see it when they see it. They reply when they reply. Yeah, or they see it when they're rudely woken by it. Sure, we all have to put our phones on silent because of people like you! I would rather not have to put my phone on silent in case of emergencies. But rude friends who text at stupid hours make this impossible. Anyways, I don't think it's a deal breaker, but in terms of early dating, it's not going to make a great impression. 1
Flame Aura Posted June 9, 2019 Posted June 9, 2019 Yeah, or they see it when they're rudely woken by it. Sure, we all have to put our phones on silent because of people like you! I would rather not have to put my phone on silent in case of emergencies. But rude friends who text at stupid hours make this impossible. Anyways, I don't think it's a deal breaker, but in terms of early dating, it's not going to make a great impression. This is a joke right? Why would you not put your phone on silent when sleeping..
LivingWaterPlease Posted June 9, 2019 Posted June 9, 2019 This is a joke right? Why would you not put your phone on silent when sleeping.. Well, if you have children who don't live at home you want to be available at all times in case of an emergency with one of them. Or in case they want to get in touch with you. There may be folks with other close friends or family members who want to be available at all hours but don't necessarily want to be awakened too early or too late for routine calls or texts. A good thing for a person to do is to ask the one they're dating what their preferences are in texting times. I've had friends ask me and I appreciate it. The 7 a.m. text wouldn't be a deal breaker for me, though. I have a friend who routinely texts around 5:20 a.m. and I sleep through it. Guess I've become accustomed to it. Have never mentioned it to my friend. Her texts are encouraging clips that are a great way to begin the day. If they bothered me I'd tell her so. 1
guest569 Posted June 9, 2019 Posted June 9, 2019 This is a joke right? Why would you not put your phone on silent when sleeping.. I mentioned why.
snowboy91 Posted June 10, 2019 Posted June 10, 2019 He sent the message at a time that suited him. He should expect a response at a time that suits you - at which time you shouldn't expect a response until it suits him, and so forth. If it turns out your schedules aren't compatible then you'll work that out over the longer term. In the meantime, don't stress too much about it.
cassiefromvegas Posted June 11, 2019 Posted June 11, 2019 I personally wouldn't say it's a red flag. However, as the above poster mentioned, it may be a red flag in the sense that you have different schedules. When I was in my last clinical, I was there by 6:30-6:45am and had a 1- 2 hour commute, so it was lights out early to be up at 4am, maybe even an hour earlier to get some studying in. I wouldn't necessarily call the people who were texting me back after 8 or 9pm inconsiderate, since they didn't realize my schedule. Ask more about his schedule and if it does bother you, perhaps communicate that you would prefer to be texted after a certain hour in the morning. 1
todreaminblue Posted June 11, 2019 Posted June 11, 2019 no i dont find it disrespectful at all for after all were you on the website at 7 and obviously if you were you didnt have to answer at 7 in the morning....my ex starts early in the morning to this day he still often calls early.....and wakes me up....which is probably good for me because otherwise i would just stay dreaming till midday.....alarm clocks are disrespectful they dont give a crap what time you go to bed they are insistent and annoying even when you tell them to shut up...but we still have them wake us up and we keep them the closest thing normally to us.....besides the pillow we dream on...so nah...i dont think he was disrespectful ...beat your alarm clock up...it deserves it....pesky thing..........deb
Iris The Butterfly Posted June 11, 2019 Posted June 11, 2019 No, I don't find this disrespectful. People don't expect a real time conversation via text, so if he happens to be an early riser, he might send that text before getting ready for work, etc. And you just respond when you're able. My bf will text me late at night sometimes, I am usually asleep before he is and he will text good night after midnight often, when he knows I'm already asleep. I don't find that disrespectful at all, in fact I'm always happy that he does. One thing I do is set my phone to Do Not Disturb between 12-8 a.m. I don't want to be bothered by texts and calls in that timeframe. If it's an emergency, someone will call and reach me if they have to. If you don't want to get woken up at 7 a.m. by a text by this guy, try DND function.
DrNo1962 Posted June 12, 2019 Posted June 12, 2019 This is kind of odd. I'd hate it if you dismissed someone based on the hour they texted you. It's pretty low on the indiscretion level. If he's pinging you texts at all hours and its getting on your nerves, perhaps confront him about it and see how he reacts. If he's embarrassed/apologetic then it can only be a good thing. If he's defensive about his behaviour then I'd tread carefully or move on.
guest569 Posted June 12, 2019 Posted June 12, 2019 One thing I do is set my phone to Do Not Disturb between 12-8 a.m. I don't want to be bothered by texts and calls in that timeframe. If it's an emergency, someone will call and reach me if they have to. If you don't want to get woken up at 7 a.m. by a text by this guy, try DND function. But how do the emergency calls get through if its on DND? Say a relative is rushed to hospital or a friend is in a really bad way and needs help.
basil67 Posted June 12, 2019 Posted June 12, 2019 I don't know about Androids, but on an iPhone you have the option to exclude selected numbers from DND. My immediate family and daughter's boyfriend's family are all on breakthrough. 1
Versacehottie Posted June 12, 2019 Posted June 12, 2019 Lol totally valid all the points about what people's personal preferences are. I just think if you need to start putting your phone on DND in order to avoid someone who is acting overeager, it's done before it's started--probably what the OP really means, i.e. she doesn't have enough of a connection yet with him to welcome a text that early, i.e. enjoy receiving one, be excited. It's not the interruption per se, it's the overeagerness without reason in her mind. Just my guess. It's not wrong that he did it, but it's not right either, i.e. not helping his case. Less of the practical reasons of when she can receive/return texts, more of the impression it leaves.
JuneL Posted June 12, 2019 Posted June 12, 2019 But in this globalization time and age, I would have thought muting the phone with emergency bypass is the norm.
Inspire Posted June 13, 2019 Posted June 13, 2019 I don't necessarily think its a bad thing. What did the message say exactly? Personally, I wouldn't text that early in the morning unless I knew it was ok to do so because some people just take things the wrong way. I'd love it if a girl texted me in the morning after having exchanged numbers. It would show she's interested.
OatsAndHall Posted June 13, 2019 Posted June 13, 2019 Deal breaker? No. If you leave your notifications on at night and don't want to be woken up, tell him you'd prefer if he not text you until later in the morning. I'm generally up at 5am and send out text and emails around 7am; I'm caffeinated and ready to go. 1
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