Jump to content

32 year old doctor never been in a relationship and finding it difficult to find anyo

Bluecheesenofleas

By Bluecheesenofleas
in Dating

 Share
While the thread author can add an update and reopen discussion, this thread was last posted in over a month ago. Want to continue the conversation? Feel free to start a new thread instead!

Recommended Posts

Garcon1986 Established Member

Garcon1986

Posted
Posted

I'm voting with the Dalmatian on this one, seek out an interesting person first. You'll have much easier success.

  • Like 1
salparadise Established Member

salparadise

Posted
Posted

Yea Doc, you need to change your mindset and demeanor. No man ever got laid out of sympathy for negativity toward himself. If turning on the charm doesn’t come naturally to you, you need to fake it until you make it. Chat up the gals checking you out at the grocery store, make them smile and feel good. Gain some flow and confidence there and then apply it elsewhere. Get help with the depression if it’s bad. You have to keep expectations reasonable, love yourself, and keep on trying. It’s not easy for many of us, but neither is med school and you accomplished that. Keep moving forward.

  • Like 2
JuneL Established Member

JuneL

Posted
Posted
Petite, with assessts.

 

Can you provide a few celebrities as examples with such a body type?

vla1120 Established Member

vla1120

Posted
Posted

Bluecheese, my daughter is in about the same boat as you. She is 35 (but looks MUCH younger) and has tried all the dating apps to no available. She's attractive, petite, independent, self-sufficient, hard-working (with a good paying job), but very single with no prospects. She had no luck with any of the dating apps and now refuses to use them. She had a few relationships, but wasted too much of her time on guys who cheated on her. Now, she trusts no man, so she sabotages the relationship before it even gets started.

 

I'm going to tell you what I've told her - there are still legitimate match makers. They are not cheap, but they will dig deep and get to know you. Based on your personality, lifestyle, interests, etc., they will find someone who is a good fit for you. I've done a ton of research on the one near where I live (East Coast U.S.A) They are very successful. I even know of a few doctors who used them because they simply did not have time to invest in trying to find that special someone.

 

My daughter is stubborn and refuses to try this. She says if she can't meet someone on her own, then she's not meant to be with anyone. Meanwhile, she works long days and goes home to her three cats, so where, exactly, does she think she's going to meet someone!!??

 

I hope you will consider this prospect. At least I'll know SOMEONE listened to my advice!

  • Like 1
rightondude Established Member

rightondude

Posted
Posted

If your appearance is causing you such confidence issues, blow some of that doctor cash on plastic surgery and hair plugs. If that's what it takes to get you smiling and confident. Life's too short to deal with that.

 

I myself am bald(ing) ... oh who am I kidding. I'm bald. Shave your head. It looks better. Growing a nice trimmed beard helps as well.

disneyfan90 Established Member

disneyfan90

Posted
Posted
'Only good looking men get the girl' Are you suggesting that every single man you see who has a girlfriend is good looking? That's the silliest thing I've read all day. Take off your blinkers and look around. Plenty of average dudes are in relationships. Smack yourself upside your head with a dose of reality.

 

Well said, I couldn't agree more!

 

Speaking from personal experience, I've been attracted to all sorts of men in my life - some good-looking, and some, objectively speaking, could be considered not so good-looking from a purely physical standpoint. What attracted me to these so-called average-looking men was their personality - their confidence, charm, and optimism toward life completely won me over. Since then, I've come to the conclusion that at least for me, looks have hardly anything to do with who I'm attracted to. It's the personality I'm drawn to.

 

OP, please change the way you view yourself. All hope is not lost. Once you begin to see things in a more positive light, I guarantee you that things will change.

Foxhall Established Member

Foxhall

Posted
Posted
Bluecheese, my daughter is in about the same boat as you. She is 35 (but looks MUCH younger) and has tried all the dating apps to no available. She's attractive, petite, independent, self-sufficient, hard-working (with a good paying job), but very single with no prospects. She had no luck with any of the dating apps and now refuses to use them. She had a few relationships, but wasted too much of her time on guys who cheated on her. Now, she trusts no man, so she sabotages the relationship before it even gets started.

 

 

hmmn maybe I am the guy for your daughter!

 

Id imagine I would be a fish out of water however on the East Coast of the USA, or perhaps not!

would she relocate to my neck of the woods,

vla1120 Established Member

vla1120

Posted
Posted
hmmm maybe I am the guy for your daughter!

 

Id imagine I would be a fish out of water however on the East Coast of the USA, or perhaps not!

would she relocate to my neck of the woods,

 

I showed her your message, Foxhall. This was her response:

 

*updates her passport* ✈️

 

:lmao::lmao:

 

We’re quite Irish, by the way. Her grandmother came over on the boat from County Antrim.

Foxhall Established Member

Foxhall

Posted
Posted
I showed her your message, Foxhall. This was her response:

 

*updates her passport* ✈️

 

:lmao::lmao:

 

We’re quite Irish, by the way. Her grandmother came over on the boat from County Antrim.

 

I'll show her the Irish charm!

 

ah thats lovely,

 

have ancestors myself who went across in the early 1900s,

 

their descendants are now living in Portland, Maine.

  • Author
Bluecheesenofleas Member

Bluecheesenofleas

Posted
  • Author
Posted

So guys I just finished a session with a life coach and basically the issue I identified was back at 18 I was a kid who was passionate about life. After 18 that marked a turning point. I've realized that the passionate version of me is someone much more attractive, the life coach didn't charge me money this time round but I insisted. The thing he said was that he didn't understand why I viewed myself in such a negative light and all he sees is a handsome man and he couldn't understand why I was still single. I've had a few ppl say this in the past. But in practice my results paint a different story so I take it with a pinch of salt

  • Author
Bluecheesenofleas Member

Bluecheesenofleas

Posted
  • Author
Posted
Bluecheese, my daughter is in about the same boat as you. She is 35 (but looks MUCH younger) and has tried all the dating apps to no available. She's attractive, petite, independent, self-sufficient, hard-working (with a good paying job), but very single with no prospects. She had no luck with any of the dating apps and now refuses to use them. She had a few relationships, but wasted too much of her time on guys who cheated on her. Now, she trusts no man, so she sabotages the relationship before it even gets started.

 

I'm going to tell you what I've told her - there are still legitimate match makers. They are not cheap, but they will dig deep and get to know you. Based on your personality, lifestyle, interests, etc., they will find someone who is a good fit for you. I've done a ton of research on the one near where I live (East Coast U.S.A) They are very successful. I even know of a few doctors who used them because they simply did not have time to invest in trying to find that special someone.

 

My daughter is stubborn and refuses to try this. She says if she can't meet someone on her own, then she's not meant to be with anyone. Meanwhile, she works long days and goes home to her three cats, so where, exactly, does she think she's going to meet someone!!??

 

I hope you will consider this prospect. At least I'll know SOMEONE listened to my advice!

 

I'm sorry your daughter been messed around with. And its understandable why shed be reluctant to go into another relationship. For me I've dealt poorly with rejection. In the last few weeks I felt suicide was an option. But after seeking advice and getting a life coach. Whsts been missing for me all this time is a loss of passion. I'm going on a vacation in 2 weeks to Thailand (not to get hitched with a young thai girl or ladyboy) just so I can get out of my head and just live life. Once I become that passionate guy again I couldn't care who rejects me, and I know deep down that the aura I exude will attract the one I'm after

  • Like 1
Garcon1986 Established Member

Garcon1986

Posted
Posted

Yes work very hard on your depression old chap. This will be a great help.

  • Author
Bluecheesenofleas Member

Bluecheesenofleas

Posted
  • Author
Posted
If your appearance is causing you such confidence issues, blow some of that doctor cash on plastic surgery and hair plugs. If that's what it takes to get you smiling and confident. Life's too short to deal with that.

 

I myself am bald(ing) ... oh who am I kidding. I'm bald. Shave your head. It looks better. Growing a nice trimmed beard helps as well.

Mate I've had a think.over things and I dont think I'm.as bad looking as I claim. It was the depression and frustration talking when I began the thread. I'm no Adonis but I'm neither hunchback of nostradam. I'm a decent looking guy. As for the bald thing I embraced the balding look years ago I've been shaving my head since 28. Ppl say I look better bald then when I had hair.

vla1120 Established Member

vla1120

Posted
Posted
So guys I just finished a session with a life coach and basically the issue I identified was back at 18 I was a kid who was passionate about life. After 18 that marked a turning point. I've realized that the passionate version of me is someone much more attractive, the life coach didn't charge me money this time round but I insisted. The thing he said was that he didn't understand why I viewed myself in such a negative light and all he sees is a handsome man and he couldn't understand why I was still single. I've had a few ppl say this in the past. But in practice my results paint a different story so I take it with a pinch of salt

 

I'll agree with him that a positive, cheerful person is - by nature - more attractive. Why do you think you lost that passion for life? Was it the very hard work of medical school (which I would understand!)? When you think of the passion you had for life at 18, what exactly was your passion for? Was it something you have the option of being involved in again? There are plenty of resources out on the internet that can help you regain that passion, starting with improving your self-image, therefore improving your self-confidence. Instead of thinking of yourself negatively, pick the things you LIKE about your appearance, and focus on those things while continuing to think positive. Seeing a man walking with confidence, with his head up, shoulders back, walking with purpose, is definitely an eye-catcher!

d0nnivain Established Member

d0nnivain

Posted
Posted

I'm glad you got the Life Coach. Enjoy your trip. I hope you re-ignite your passion for life again.

 

Best wishes!

  • Like 1
rightondude Established Member

rightondude

Posted
Posted
So guys I just finished a session with a life coach and basically the issue I identified was back at 18 I was a kid who was passionate about life. After 18 that marked a turning point. I've realized that the passionate version of me is someone much more attractive, the life coach didn't charge me money this time round but I insisted. The thing he said was that he didn't understand why I viewed myself in such a negative light and all he sees is a handsome man and he couldn't understand why I was still single. I've had a few ppl say this in the past. But in practice my results paint a different story so I take it with a pinch of salt

 

well brother you went from (hopefully BS) considering killing yourself to this in a couple of days, I'd say this dude earned the money. You need to stick with him and I'll take his card if you've got it...

rightondude Established Member

rightondude

Posted
Posted
Mate I've had a think.over things and I dont think I'm.as bad looking as I claim. It was the depression and frustration talking when I began the thread. I'm no Adonis but I'm neither hunchback of nostradam. I'm a decent looking guy. As for the bald thing I embraced the balding look years ago I've been shaving my head since 28. Ppl say I look better bald then when I had hair.

 

Believe them when they say that.

 

Plus, dude, you are a doctor, which raises your attractiveness like x 10000 times to women automatically!!! You can beat this, man!

xxcazaxx Member

xxcazaxx

Posted
Posted

Its true what they say when they say that you have to love yourself before someone else can love you (trust me, i have been in relationships at a time when i have not loved myself and that was one of the things that destroyed it).

chillii Established Member

chillii

Posted
Posted
I'm sorry your daughter been messed around with. And its understandable why shed be reluctant to go into another relationship. For me I've dealt poorly with rejection. In the last few weeks I felt suicide was an option. But after seeking advice and getting a life coach. Whsts been missing for me all this time is a loss of passion. I'm going on a vacation in 2 weeks to Thailand (not to get hitched with a young thai girl or ladyboy) just so I can get out of my head and just live life. Once I become that passionate guy again I couldn't care who rejects me, and I know deep down that the aura I exude will attract the one I'm after

 

 

 

 

That's the spirit doc , things will come together. lt's just amazed me over and over right through life at just what we never knew is just around the corner.

Everything, life, can totally change in a second a week a year.

camillalev Established Member

camillalev

Posted
Posted
most times I end up getting matched with women I'm either not attracted to or are way older then me. I wouldnt describe myself as bad looking but I'm not physically good lookin,(if that makes sense)g.

 

They’re thinking the same about you.

It baffles me when men complain that no one is interested in them or find them attractive, then don’t consider dating certain people because they’re not conventionally attractive either.

Attraction is more than physical looks or being conventionally attractive. Being conventionally attractive doesn’t build the foundation for a great relationship.

 

Most people fall in love with partners that don’t fit some preconceived notion of their “type”.

  • Like 1
camillalev Established Member

camillalev

Posted
Posted

 

You're mad at women for choosing the better looking men, but yet, look what you're doing yourself -- rejecting women who match your own physical attraction level even though they may be very smart nice people with whom you have something in common.

 

 

Yup

 

'Only good looking men get the girl' Are you suggesting that every single man you see who has a girlfriend is good looking? That's the silliest thing I've read all day. Take off your blinkers and look around. Plenty of average dudes are in relationships. Smack yourself upside your head with a dose of reality.

 

Only good looking guys get the trophy, is what he means

 

 

 

They get the catch.

 

^

 

Assets are important hight isnt that much of an issue.

 

Someone asks what your type is and you only has two things to say, and they’re both physical characteristics. With an emphasis on “assets” aka t*ts and a*s. No surprise.

 

Maybe this is why you’ve “never been in a relationship” at 32?

  • Like 1
Interstellar Established Member

Interstellar

Posted
Posted

You said you have decent build? Gotta go to the gym first and take care of your health, and lose those extra pounds, and more importantly get strong by training your mind. If the mind is strong that carries over into other areas of your life, and you’ll feel more confident.

 

Yes, you gotta look good and take care of your appearance man, and if you want to attract the younger women as well. Google: Brad Pitt Fight Club W Magazine. Get your body looking like that if you want to be notice.

  • 1 month later...
bluesfan Established Member

bluesfan

Posted
Posted

Doctor? Damn, women usually trip over themselves wanting to hookup with a doctor and get on the gravy train. Especially nurses at hospitals.

 

 

I trade anything to be a medical doctor.

 Share
Go to topic listing
×
×
  • Create New...