malaiyas Posted May 30, 2019 Posted May 30, 2019 It sounds like all she was after was probably attention and validation, so when you tried to cross that invisible boundary into more personal territory, she bailed. I don't mean to turn this into a gender specific issue by any means as I am female myself, but look at all the women who "thirst trap" on Facebook and Instagram. "Facebook famous" = having something like 3000+ random male friends, posting sexy pictures. Look at the amount of comments and likes on those pictures... do you think these women have any interest in talking or getting to know any of these men? No, they don't. You'd need only one peek into their inbox to witness the hundreds of unopened messages from these men. It's all about validation. Sorry, OP. 2
Author crispytoast Posted May 30, 2019 Author Posted May 30, 2019 (edited) @michelle to be clear I'm not trying to paint this as a female only issue. It just happens to be focused on females because that's who I'm drawn to from a dating standpoint. And also this wasn't over online dating. @gretchen I mean ive met up with women on dating apps who had a picture of a cartoon character or movie character simply because I was curious who was behind the mask. So while I get what your saying, I can also directly relate to the opposite. As for this woman I liked her because I felt she was charismatic, intelligent, and driven. This was all in person, and I could tell she was drawn to my energy too-- and I know this because I am good at reading and communicating body language which unfortunately goes out the window if I'm getting to know someone over text message. When she laid down all of her achievements in my DMs I will admit that I was less impressed than I would've been if she waited to tell me that in person, I already could tell she was a driven person because she carried herself as such and the texts came off as seeking validation. I guess I don't want to lead with my own accomplishments because I don't want to come off as seeking validation. Perhaps I'm wrong for feeling this way. @malaiyas Im aware of that and personally I wouldn't really want a partner whose life revolves around their social media presence. Many men are very shallow and thirst for that beauty.. personally I've met too many women who are corrupted by the power of their beauty for me to be impressed by beauty alone. I'm sure there's a way men do this too. Edited May 30, 2019 by crispytoast
Flame Aura Posted May 30, 2019 Posted May 30, 2019 This is a very common scenario, it's called keeping you in orbit, you are an orbiter basically. She wanted to keep you close enough to still have interest in her, but far away enough that nothing actually ever happens. Was a big shock when it happened to me the first time, took me a while to understand it and get over it as it affected me like it has you. The bottom line is women like this love the attention. Look at her actions as opposed to her words to see if they are interested. 1
Author crispytoast Posted May 30, 2019 Author Posted May 30, 2019 (edited) That's so wack. It's extremely disrespectful. Oh well, I'm not going to play into it. I have deleted all of our text messages and removed her number from my phone. Her loss. You live and you learn. Thank you all by the way! I definitely feel quite a bit better. I had been working 8-12 hour days for 10 days straight and was definitely energetically compromised. There's no need to let things get to me like that though. Edited May 30, 2019 by crispytoast 1
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