HeartbeatBack Posted May 12, 2019 Posted May 12, 2019 When I was at school, there was an out teacher. We got on well but I haven't spoken to her since I left, I was 16 then but I haven't seen her since. I felt that we had a good friendship at the time however it has been 5 years since I left. I don't know whether I should reach out? I am out too and I know she knew that at the time.
d0nnivain Posted May 12, 2019 Posted May 12, 2019 Teachers like hearing from former students about the student's academic successes; trying to form a friendship requires a complete shift in the power dynamic & rarely works. Unless you bump into her organically I wouldn't reach out with the hopes of striking up a romance. It will be very difficult for her to ever see you as anything except the child she used to teach.
OatsAndHall Posted May 12, 2019 Posted May 12, 2019 As a teacher, I love it when former students reach out to me to tell me what they're up to. But, I would be exceptionally uncomfortable if one approached me romantically, even after five years. Outside of the random outlier, teachers don't view their students in that context. At most, I've had more of a surrogate relative relationship with students and that's been quite rare for me. And, also be aware that you could put that teacher in a compromised position, professionally if you do reach out to them for anything outside of a friendly chat. There is an unwritten rule in this profession about keeping boundaries, even with former students. There's generally a stigma surrounding meeting up with a former student of the opposite sex/same sexual orientation in this field.
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