menyou Posted May 11, 2019 Posted May 11, 2019 Is anyone honest anymore? Seriously. The guy I was dating “broke up” with me citing that his divorce wasn’t final( which was finalized about a week ago) and couldn’t commit before getting his crap together and apparently lying thru his teeth is dating someone else. Only reason I know is through tagged pics of her “in love” with him on Facebook which he promptly untagged himself. Does anyone know how to be a human today or what?!? 1
d0nnivain Posted May 11, 2019 Posted May 11, 2019 His divorce may be final on paper but now that he has the paper it's not final in his head. When you date somebody who is not yet divorced when you start up with them, you run the risk that this happens. Sorry. At least he gave you a clean break. The silver lining in this is that you know its' over. He didn't ghost. You are not hoping & wondering if he'll come back. Sorry this happened. It does suck but you can move forward from here. 3
Gaeta Posted May 12, 2019 Posted May 12, 2019 It's not crap, people do need to get their sh&t together after a divorce. You should know better than getting involved with a man recently divorced. 1
divegrl Posted May 12, 2019 Posted May 12, 2019 Hi! Yes there are honest, loving and loyal men out there! Don’t lose hope! Have a beautiful day my friend! 3
smackie9 Posted May 12, 2019 Posted May 12, 2019 Believe it or not, we benefit from the challenges of dating because it makes us work harder and smarter to find the right one. You make better choices in who you invest in. 3
OatsAndHall Posted May 12, 2019 Posted May 12, 2019 Believe it or not, we benefit from the challenges of dating because it makes us work harder and smarter to find the right one. You make better choices in who you invest in. Agreed. I know that I've grown as a person since I began dating after my divorce. I've figured out what I want, what I don't want, and become better at working through the negative aspects of dating. I will also echo would people have said about not dating recently divorced men. I began dating too quickly, post-divorce, and I wasn't ready. I had moved past my ex-wife, emotionally, but I was only dating because I hadn't learned how to be alone again. 1
I'veseenbetterlol Posted May 12, 2019 Posted May 12, 2019 Is anyone honest anymore? Seriously. The guy I was dating “broke up” with me citing that his divorce wasn’t final( which was finalized about a week ago) and couldn’t commit before getting his crap together and apparently lying thru his teeth is dating someone else. Only reason I know is through tagged pics of her “in love” with him on Facebook which he promptly untagged himself. Does anyone know how to be a human today or what?!? Anytime someone says those things, they are making excuses. Getting "crap together" and being in a relationship aren't mutually exclusive. Whenever a man has told me that, I knew he either wanted to be single or he was dating someone else. In the end they just didn't want to be w/me. After having those experiences, I say delete/block and go NC. 2
TheFinalWord Posted May 13, 2019 Posted May 13, 2019 When it comes to a breakup, most people aren't gonna be honest. They are just gonna say whatever they think will make the breakup easier for you both. This. When someone gives BS excuses, I quit trying to figure out why, what happened, what's wrong with me...you'll drive yourself nuts. If a person isn't prioritizing getting to know you, that's all you really need to know. All you can keep do is keep circulating.
Author menyou Posted May 13, 2019 Author Posted May 13, 2019 Thanks for all the replies. I am over it. Just sucks when you keep finding all the losers * 1
I'veseenbetterlol Posted May 13, 2019 Posted May 13, 2019 This. When someone gives BS excuses, I quit trying to figure out why, what happened, what's wrong with me...you'll drive yourself nuts. If a person isn't prioritizing getting to know you, that's all you really need to know. All you can keep do is keep circulating. Yep! Don't try to get closure cause you won't get any. Def not worth your time!
stillafool Posted May 13, 2019 Posted May 13, 2019 Do not date newly separated or divorced men. They are not ones to want to catapult back into a relationship but will want to play the field and see what's out there before they settle down again. The same goes with women because when I divorced settling down was the last thing on my mind.
Author menyou Posted May 14, 2019 Author Posted May 14, 2019 Do not date newly separated or divorced men. They are not ones to want to catapult back into a relationship but will want to play the field and see what's out there before they settle down again. The same goes with women because when I divorced settling down was the last thing on my mind. It seems that the majority of men are “newly separated or divorced” I have not found one guy that has his act remotely together in the last 6 years and I am the least judge mental in that category. It’s the worst!
h0000 Posted May 14, 2019 Posted May 14, 2019 Does it really matter why he broke up with you? Would it make you feel better had he told you "Im in love with someone else so im dumping you now"? You really want that brutal honesty? If I were you, I'd actually be happy he didnt waste my time or ghost me, and move on, and not go around snooping on social media.
Author menyou Posted May 14, 2019 Author Posted May 14, 2019 Does it really matter why he broke up with you? Would it make you feel better had he told you "Im in love with someone else so im dumping you now"? You really want that brutal honesty? If I were you, I'd actually be happy he didnt waste my time or ghost me, and move on, and not go around snooping on social media. Actually, based on the Facebook posts, he didn’t break up with me and THEN start dating someone else. He was dating both of us at the same time. So to answer your question, yes, tell me the truth. I’m a big girl. If that would have been brought to light when he met her it would have saved me my precious time and effort that was wasted on him.
h0000 Posted May 14, 2019 Posted May 14, 2019 Were you exclusive? So you are saying, you need to know the exactly truth why he broke up with you, like why he chose her over you? That would make you feel better than just knowing he wants to break up with you?
Author menyou Posted May 14, 2019 Author Posted May 14, 2019 Were you exclusive? So you are saying, you need to know the exactly truth why he broke up with you, like why he chose her over you? That would make you feel better than just knowing he wants to break up with you? Yes, we were exclusive. And No, I don’t need to know anything. Not at this point at least . I basically made this thread wondering why some people have zero decency. I would never do 3/4 of the crap that I see other people do. I knew he wasn’t ready to dive into a relationship. We had many discussions about it. You would think that being honest with someone would in turn make them feel they can be honest with you. Not the case apparently. After all I’ve seen and been thru I don’t think I will ever fully trust a person in my life.
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