snowcones Posted April 19, 2019 Posted April 19, 2019 Do you feel 100% certain that your spouse loves you? Just curious about what the norm is.
BaileyB Posted April 19, 2019 Posted April 19, 2019 (edited) Yes. I’m not going to say that we are always happy with each other, but I have no doubt that he loves me. He tells me all the time - both with his words and actions. He has never given me any reason to think otherwise... In fact, he told me once when I was teasing him to tell me how much he loved me that I should just assume that he loves me until he tells me otherwise... Thankfully, that has never happened. Edited April 19, 2019 by BaileyB 2
d0nnivain Posted April 19, 2019 Posted April 19, 2019 Yes. He proves it to me in little ways every day & in big ways every so often. I hope that he also knows how much I love him, but I think he does. 2
zig Posted April 19, 2019 Posted April 19, 2019 Yes, I'm 100% confident that my wife loves me and cares deeply about me but I greatly question her romantic desire for me. I think intimacy repulses her and she just goes through the motions because she has to. I suspect she would be completely fine with sex 1-2 times per month. Last night we went into the hot tub because earlier in the day she brought up that we could have sex later in the hot tub. Fooled around a little but then she lost the mood so she went into the bedroom. I came to bed and she asked for a massage which I gave her. This morning I woke up, made breakfast for the kids, cleaned the house, one load of laundry and now sitting with the kids watching T.V. She's still in bed sleeping but I dread when she comes out because she's going to ask me what I want to do today. Which is code for how can we serve and entertain the kids the rest of the day. Anyway, yeah my wife loves me, it's just in her own way I guess. 1
Mr. Lucky Posted April 19, 2019 Posted April 19, 2019 Anyway, yeah my wife loves me, it's just in her own way I guess. In a general sense, I'd guess that's true of most spouses. No doubt my wife loves and cares for me, but it's certainly expressed in her own way. I try to avoid the trap of looking for affirmations outside her comfort zone... Mr. Lucky 1
Els Posted April 19, 2019 Posted April 19, 2019 Yes, 100%. Of course, like all humans, he is not perfect - but he definitely demonstrates without any doubt that he loves me, on a daily basis. 1
mark clemson Posted April 19, 2019 Posted April 19, 2019 At the 22 yr mark I'd say the "deeply in love" which was definitely there, has come and mostly gone. But the LTR love is definitely there, she wants us to be together. It's different though - much more familial. I do sometimes wonder if it's going to be enough for me for the next 20 years. 1
loversquarrel Posted April 19, 2019 Posted April 19, 2019 Yes absolutely. I never had that type of confidence before in anybody. 1
TheRainbow Posted April 20, 2019 Posted April 20, 2019 Definately 100%. Sometimes he loves me to a fault since he turns a blind eye to a lot of **** I do.
Wolverine1997 Posted April 20, 2019 Posted April 20, 2019 I have no doubt she loves me, but it is more like a close friendship type love and not friends with benefits.
Blind-Sided Posted April 21, 2019 Posted April 21, 2019 (edited) Who really knows what goes through someone else's head. I was with my wife for 20 years. One morning she said "I love you." some time between lunch and dinner I got....... "I don't love you, haven't in a long time, and I fear for my life." If you would have asked me this question before that... I would have said "Absolutely she loves me, and I'll be married the rest of my life". (zero indication that things where that way in her head) And now you know why I chose that name. Edited April 21, 2019 by Blind-Sided
Author snowcones Posted April 21, 2019 Author Posted April 21, 2019 Who really knows what goes through someone else's head. I was with my wife for 20 years. One morning she said "I love you." some time between lunch and dinner I got....... "I don't love you, haven't in a long time, and I fear for my life." If you would have asked me this question before that... I would have said "Absolutely she loves me, and I'll be married the rest of my life". (zero indication that things where that way in her head) And now you know why I chose that name. The question wasn't really directed towards divorced people or people who are dating.
Blind-Sided Posted April 21, 2019 Posted April 21, 2019 The question wasn't really directed towards divorced people or people who are dating. Technically, I'm not divorced... yet. But the question is valid. we've been together 20 years, and in November... one day went from love to no love without warning. I still am in love with my wife... but something in her snapped. There are more stories like this around here.
Author snowcones Posted April 21, 2019 Author Posted April 21, 2019 Technically, I'm not divorced... yet. But the question is valid. we've been together 20 years, and in November... one day went from love to no love without warning. I still am in love with my wife... but something in her snapped. There are more stories like this around here. Question is not directed towards separated people either, but people who are married and not in the process of divorcing are welcome to answer.
Mr. Lucky Posted April 22, 2019 Posted April 22, 2019 Question is not directed towards separated people either, but people who are married and not in the process of divorcing are welcome to answer. I think you're missing Blind-Sided's point. At one time, he was indeed sure his spouse loved him. He's offering that may not be as permanent as we'd all like to believe... Mr. Lucky 3
Blind-Sided Posted April 22, 2019 Posted April 22, 2019 I think you're missing Blind-Sided's point. At one time, he was indeed sure his spouse loved him. He's offering that may not be as permanent as we'd all like to believe... Mr. Lucky Exactly!! And since the question is "are you sure your spouse loves you?".... My responce is.... You really never know. Because they may just be lying to you. 1
Author snowcones Posted April 22, 2019 Author Posted April 22, 2019 I think you're missing Blind-Sided's point. At one time, he was indeed sure his spouse loved him. He's offering that may not be as permanent as we'd all like to believe... Mr. Lucky I’m aware of that. I’m a divorcee myself. I know what the answer is when you have an impending divorce. I wanted to hear from people who don’t have that.
Wallysbears Posted April 22, 2019 Posted April 22, 2019 My husband doesn't lie. Not even little white lies that most people tell. He is honest to a fault. And he's also as easy to read as a book...when even the littlest of things are bothering him? I can tell. So that said, my original answer of Yes, he loves me stands. Without a doubt. 1
Author snowcones Posted April 23, 2019 Author Posted April 23, 2019 One of the reasons I asked is because when I was married, I never felt sure that he loved me. That's probably why we're divorced now. I know this is not normal and I was wondering what normal people do.
Art_Critic Posted April 23, 2019 Posted April 23, 2019 "Are you sure your spouse loves you?" At times I do, then there are times I'm pretty sure I question it. We have been married almost 12 years and have our ups and downs, during the ups I'm sure but during the downs I wonder.. not sure if that is normal but it is what it is... 1
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