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We were dating for 2 months, then after our first argument she deleted me.

Mike Phelan

By Mike Phelan
in Breaks and Breaking Up

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Beachead Established Member

Beachead

Posted
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thanks alot my friend for these words. Made me feel a whole lot better.

 

The maybe if I had done this and that differently questions are the ones going through my head the most. But as you said, its lunacy expecting everything to be exactly as the other person wants it.

 

If she can't have 1 decent conversation with me about how she feels, then she isn't someone to think about anymore

 

I'm glad man. Keep your head up. This isn't your fault. I know it's easy for others to advise but a tough pill to swallow when you're in it yourself. She meant something to you even if she turned out to be a turd. So take your time with it and grieve it out. It's alright to hurt. You can post up on here or on the coping threads if you have trouble dealing with it or require some advice on how to effectively grieve. I and quite a few others can certainly help you with that if need be.

 

- Beach

preraph Established Member

preraph

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I guess between seeing you drunk and not liking the drunk you and then her needing you to respect her own schedule, she just decided to move on because you are not the guy for her. Sorry.

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Inspire Established Member

Inspire

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The maybe if I had done this and that differently questions are the ones going through my head the most. But as you said, its lunacy expecting everything to be exactly as the other person wants it.

 

If she can't have 1 decent conversation with me about how she feels, then she isn't someone to think about anymore

 

Its perfectly normal to look back and try to make sense. As they say, "hindsight is 20/20". While the outcome may have been the same, self-reflection is healthy. It helps us to become a better person.

dim84 Member

dim84

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Hi Mike,

 

 

I know that the natural tendency in your case is to over-analyze everything trying to think what you did wrong. Please don't do this, its a pointless excessive.

 

 

 

She didn't find what she was looking for in you, so she just found a pretext to break up. You can take it as a given, that she was planning well ahead for this moment. Most probably ghosted you because she couldn't confront you. She is 100% responsible here.

 

 

 

For whatever reason these things randomly happen, especially in the first 6 months to a year of a relationship, mostly initiated by women. That's why at such early stage investing too much is not advised.

 

 

Regards

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preraph Established Member

preraph

Posted
Posted

She just decided this was not the relationship for her. It's nothing more complex than that.

  • 2 weeks later...
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Mike Phelan Member

Mike Phelan

Posted
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Posted
She just decided this was not the relationship for her. It's nothing more complex than that.

 

"It's nothing more complex than that."

 

While I get that she didn't see things going further with me, is this the way you let someone know?

 

She made me feel like an absolute dick, then doesn't even answer one message to just tell me it's over, then goes one step further and deletes me when I try call her...

 

Put yourself in my shoes. For someone to delete you like that makes you feel like you were absolute **** to the other person.

 

So actually while it's not that complex in your eyes, it is for me

TheFinalWord Established Member

TheFinalWord

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I agree with Beach. A total immature move on her end. It's not like you did anything horrible to her. These women ain't loyal bro. I've had women do similar to me. It does get hard to not become jaded, but we have to keep our chins up, recognize there are a lot of weak people in this world, and keep circulating until we find a quality partner.

Redhead14 Established Member

Redhead14

Posted
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There must be 50 ways to lose your lover . . . slip out the back Jack, make a new plan Stan, ghost his ass :)

 

She was just done Period. It was only 2 months of dating, not a committed relationship. Forget about it. If you're arguing at two months of dating, what would things look like later? Seriously.

 

Like I said in another thread, people need to stop being candy asses when a dating scenario ends quickly. It's just part of dating. Yeah, every once in a blue moon, love at first sight happens. Ninety-nine percent of time, it's just endorphins being piqued and then **** happens.

Edited by Redhead14
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