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Is my girlfriend emotionally abusive?


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Posted

We a small newborn child together (not planned):

 

1. Told me that the way I interact with our newborn is weird, because when he is crying, sometimes I just pick him up and look at him. She says she is concerned I will cause him autism.

 

2. Told me her father agrees that I am distant with the child and interact in a weird way with him. I became really offended, said you are essentially saying I dont love my child the right way. She told me to think of it as constructive criticism.

 

3. She woke me up one morning and told me to watch the baby so she could sleep 30 minutes, but that I wasnt allowed to take him outside on a stroller. When I said I would take him on a stroller if I wanted, she took him back from me.

 

4. She hired a nanny that she apparently really liked. Three days in she decided she didnt like her, called her mom and friend while I went to get Starbucks, and unilaterally decided to fire the nanny without consulting me.

 

5. She will go lay in bed with the baby, and when she wants something from me, will not come out of the bedroom, but text me orders.

 

Am I being overly sensitive, or there is something seriously wrong here?

Posted

She is not being abusive. It is a bit odd but it sounds like it could be remedied if you both communicated better. She should not be texting you orders. You two may benefit from some parent classes & some communication workshops. You will have to interact for the rest of your child's life.

Posted

I wouldn't call that abuse. She sounds like an anxious new mom who has a hard time trusting anyone else with her baby. Also she could have a bit of post partum depression which can also cause anxiety. Just continue to be an active participant in raising the baby and your wife should ease up as the child gets older. If she gets worse then you have a problem

Posted

Breaks my heart to hear that she won't let you be a proper father to the baby. I think money is better spent on counseling for her. She's a new mom, and she's being overly protective in a unhealthy manner. She needs a little help sorting out the feelings.

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