Looking4Sun Posted April 1, 2019 Posted April 1, 2019 Met a guy through an online dating site last month. We had three dates that went well. Kissed on the third date. After the second and third date he would send me a text when he got home to tell me he had a good time. In between dates we didn’t talk on the phone at all and we didn’t text everyday. Maybe a casual “How are you?” text every other day or so. Fourth date on Thursday night. Went well. Went back to my place and had sex. He stayed until about 1 am but said he had to go home. He lives 45 minutes away but works near me. He said he needed to be in the office the next day so he had to go home so he could change into new clothes. I was expecting a text when he got home or the next morning telling me he had a good time but got nothing. I knew he was flying later that evening to another state to visit family over the weekend. At 5 pm I get a hello text. He sends me a link to an article on a topic we had discussed the night before. He said it reminded him of me so he thought he’d send it along. Then he said “Have a good weekend!” I said thanks and exchanged some light banter and that was it. Bad sign? Or am I reading too much into it? Just thought there’d be some type of acknowledgement about the night before and something nice or sweet as that’s usually my experience (not that I have a lot of it). At this point, I’m not too invested in the guy. We have another date planned for Friday but it was planned before we slept together as he had to buy tickets for it.
RedHead5 Posted April 1, 2019 Posted April 1, 2019 I'd keep talking to him. Sounds like he is interested if he texted you, even if it was later than you expected. He just may not be a feeler kind of guy. He probably rushed home, hurried to bed (may not have texted bc he didn't know if it would wake you), had to work I assume? And texted you after. Sounds similar to me and my guy around that time. We still don't do good morning texts regularly. As long as he keeps putting forth consistent effort, I would see how it goes. 1
Inspire Posted April 1, 2019 Posted April 1, 2019 I would think ... strike that. I'd expect a little bit more than that. Sounds like he is taking it super casual. Have a good weekend? What, he can't talk over a weekend? 1
Simple Logic Posted April 1, 2019 Posted April 1, 2019 I wouldn’t over think this quite yet unless you are really lousy in bed. 2
Andy_K Posted April 1, 2019 Posted April 1, 2019 Since you already have another date lined up, and since your texting between dates thus far has been extremely limited, it's likely he considers things are just continuing as usual, with nothing to worry about. I'd assume that sex isn't such a meaningful step for him as it is for you, and he simply doesn't realise you would appreciate a nice comment or two. Alternatively, if he didn't try to kiss you until the third date, he might just be too shy to bring it up, hence why he referenced something else you two were talking about instead when he messaged you. So overall I would say no foul so far, he's most likely just either shy or on a slightly different wavelength. Both fixable given more time. 1
Blind-Sided Posted April 1, 2019 Posted April 1, 2019 It's hard to say. On one hand, as a non-aggressive guy... I wouldn't want to scare away a good potential if I was actually interested, by seeming needy. But on the other... he could just be wanting to go slow. (regardless of being physical) 20 years ago (when I was single) it wasn't as bad. txt'ng wasn't really a thing, and most people didn't have cell phones. SO... it was an actual call, from a hardline, when you got home... and if the time was appropriate. (I wouldn't call or txt someone at 1am unless it was an emergency, or expected for safety) This is a point where a girl should just take charge, and talk about what she expects. I've seen and heard more times then I really care to... one girl saying "I broke up with him because he was needy", then the next was in a panic saying "Why doesn't he call". AND... in my position... they were dang near the same level of communication. Anyway... since it's been a month, and physical... on your next date, just ask.. "Where do you see this going?" My 2 cents, take it for what it's worth.
d0nnivain Posted April 1, 2019 Posted April 1, 2019 I think you may be over reading it. You wanted "more" after becoming intimate & I can understand that. You feel like you got less but from his perspective since you already have another date planned he may think it's all good. See what happens after the 4th date. 1
Cersei Posted April 1, 2019 Posted April 1, 2019 I don't think you have to worry just yet. He was away for the weekend with family. You are reading too much into this. 1
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