whatwhit Posted March 31, 2019 Posted March 31, 2019 Hey everyone! So I met this guy during a very popular festival in town. We met on a dating app. He was in town from Los Angeles and I live in Texas which is where the festival was. We had a pretty instant connection, and ended up spending the rest of his time here together. He is from the city I live in and is making plans to move back here due to not loving the California lifestyle. His family lives where I am today. When he left he did mention how long distance is hard. Wants to continue to get to know me. We keep in some form of communication everyday. Either text, he’ll comment on something I posted on social media, and I am actually going to visit him in Los Angles near the end of April woah that’s this month happy April everyone. So yeah at the end of this month. Last time we spoke which was Thursday he said he was interested in. I am willing to do long distance with him and kind of want to bring the idea up to him if he doesn’t and just wonder what’s a non clingy way to go about asking him? He’s 36 and I’m 31. Thanks everyone
Author whatwhit Posted March 31, 2019 Author Posted March 31, 2019 He will be moving 2020 May. I know far out.
Lotsgoingon Posted March 31, 2019 Posted March 31, 2019 See how your time on the visit goes with him ... let the connection build ... then you'll get to the long-distance thing. Since he's coming back towards you in a little over a year, there is no haste to bring this up ... In fact, the possibility of dating long distance, I would assume, is already there, right in front of him just as much as you. Maybe if you guys have a great weekend ... at the end you will talk about seeing each other again I assume ... All you or he has to do is say I really had a great time this week. And the door will open ... someone will mention seeing each other again soon ... and then you'll talk plans ... and seeing each other long distance will be right there. Go and concentrate on being yourself and seeing if you like him spending time with him. That's your focus right now ... The long distance option will naturally come up assuming you and he have a great time. Translation: he wouldn't invite you out there if he didn't have the possibility of long-distance dating on his mind!
kendahke Posted March 31, 2019 Posted March 31, 2019 He will be moving 2020 May. I know far out. Then follow his lead: When he left he did mention how long distance is hard. Wants to continue to get to know me. We keep in some form of communication everyday. Either text, he’ll comment on something I posted on social media, Things are going to go at a slower pace because your relationship is going to be stuck in the honeymoon phase for the next 13 months. While that might sound great on its face, the problem is that issues and experiences you'd be going through and handling together during those 13 months are going to be suspended until you are in each other's lives on a daily basis, in close proximity. Nothing can replace being in close proximity on a daily, on-going basis for the success and growth of a relationship. The lack of proximity can have the potential to throw you off balance once you two are in the same location because of the amount of time you've invested in the LDR at the start. I'm not saying dont' do it--I'm saying be extremely cognizant of reasonable time frames for the development of your relationship because the bulk of it will be conducted with you two living different parts of the country. It's real easy to feel a way and project that the other doesn't care or isn't reading your mind that you need their support in the moment. Right now, pay attention to consistency and continuity. Keep your expectations in check and find out how patient and understanding you both are because being in an LDR, you're going to need it.
snowcones Posted March 31, 2019 Posted March 31, 2019 I think you're setting yourself up to get used.
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