There Are Several Women That I Plan To Ask Out Within The Next Month

[GuitarGuy7]

A little backstory about me, i'm a 24 year old kissless virgin. One of my goals is to get better with women. So this past semester, I have been trying to join various college groups and events to meet girls. I haven't really asked anybody out since last October and she said no, so I want to start asking girls out on dates. There are several girls that I am potentially interested in and hopefully at least one of them will say yes.

 

Here are a list of girls I plan to ask out.

 

- Girl From Work - Probability of her accepting: Low There is this girl from work that I plan on asking out as I will be leaving the job in early May. She's a little bit older then me and is nice and friendly towards me. Despite this, I don't really think she is interested in me in that way. There are guys at work who she clearly is more receptive towards, and i'm always the one initiating the conversations, not to mention she has openly talked about other using Tinder and going on dates with guys with other female co-workers. But I might go ahead and ask her out anyways because even if she says no, I likely won't see her again anyways. I'll probably ask out in the middle of May, after I have left the job.

 

- Other Girl From Work - Probability of her accepting: Medium There is also another girl from work that I see occasionally. The only time we come into contact with one another is when I work the weekend shift (which only occurs if I am covering for someone) She appears to be friendly, especially the last time I saw her. I was going to get her Snapchat the other day, but right when I was about to do it, she had to take a call for someone and I had to leave. If I see her again, I might try and get her Snapchat and then ask her out. There's also a chance she might be a lesbian since her hair is cut short like a boys.

 

- Personal Trainer - Probability of her accepting: Medium - Low She's a student at college. One of her classes is to work at the gym that I go to and earn credit hours by working with people she is assigned to as part of her class. She's tall and attractive and pretty friendly and nice. The problem is that I know that she's being nice to me because i'm her client. Also, she's a senior this year and is graduating in May and will likely be moving away. So the probability of her accepting is low. I won't ask her out until May when we are done training together, so to avoid any potential awkwardness.

 

- Girl From Improv - Probability of her accepting: Very Low

There is this girl from Improv who is cute and apparently single. The problem is that we don't really know each other all that well, we haven't built any social rapport with one another. Another problem is that her friends think i'm weird and creepy. If I asked her out now, I have no doubt in my mind she would say no. In fact, she probably woudn't even say no at all, i'd just get ignored or even potentially blocked.

 

- Girl From Social Circle - Probability of her accepting: Low

I met her among my social circle. She's tall and attractive and I am semi-interested. But if I asked her out, I don't think she would say yes for two reasons. She's a lot taller than I am and many girls don't want to date a lot shorter guys, and secondly, one night her friends encouraged her to go talk to that tall handsome man over there which she did. So I doubt she really sees me "that way."

 

Three Girls From Music Church Group - Probably Of One Of Them Accepting: Medium

 

I work with a local band that plays during college church service. Every week, the band lineup rotates so it's not always the same people. There are several cute girls in the band lineup that I could potentially ask out. I also play several musical instruments so we could potentially bond over that. I looked them all up on Facebook and they all appear to be single, although Facebook isn't always accurate sometimes. I have talked to them each for a bit, building up a little social rapports. The problem is that I haven't gotten any of their numbers of Snapchat yet. But I will try and do that next week when I am no longer on Spring Break. And then I plan to ask one of them out in April. Hopefully, one of them will say yes.

 

Three Girls From #1 - Probability Of One Of Them Accepting: To Be Determined

I haven't really talked to them yet, but my plan is to talk to them for a week or two and then ask for their Snapchat. Maybe i'll open with something along the lines of "How was your Spring Break?" and then try to work from there.

 

Girl From Math Class - Probability Of Her Accepting: To Be Determined

 

I haven't talked to this girl yet but I might try the same tactic. Try to build some social rapport, ask for her Snapchat and then eventually ask her out on a date. Hopefully it will work.

[alphamale]

maybe you can make a spreadsheet and analyze the probabilities

[Thingsfallapart]

This isn’t the 1980’s anymore... (unfortunately for me)

 

 

Just join Tinder. Get date. Get laid.

 

 

Young people have it easy these days.

Sure, it’s vapid, superficial and shallow, but it’s much easier.

[GuitarGuy7]

This isn’t the 1980’s anymore... (unfortunately for me)

 

 

Just join Tinder. Get date. Get laid.

 

 

Young people have it easy these days.

Sure, it’s vapid, superficial and shallow, but it’s much easier.

 

 

If you think it's easy to go on Tinder and get a date and get laid, then you are heavily misinformed...

 

Although I guess that depends on who you're asking.

 

What sucks about online dating is that it is heavily in a woman's favor. The experiences that men and women have on Tinder is completely different.

 

If you're a woman, as long as you're not obese or really ugly, then you won't have any problem getting matches. In fact, you will get so many matches you won't even know what to do with them all. Any of these online dating apps are on easy mode if you're a woman.

 

For most men, their experience is pretty much the opposite. The app really only works if you're a 7 or higher on the looks scale. If you're average or below average looking, it's a waste of time. You simply won't get enough matches to have a shot of even getting a girl to meet up with you, let alone go on consistent dates. The rule of thumb is the closer you resemble your society's physical ideal (In the USA, that's being tall, white, fit, and handsome) the more successful you will be on Tinder.

 

But even if you're good looking enough, you still need to have good pictures and good text game and you will have to deal with a **** ton of rejection. Girls who ghost you mid conversation, girls who you have a date set up with and they flake, girls who just want to boost their ego and have no intention of meeting up. It's super competitive if you're a guy because you have to remember, every single girl who's decent looking on there has dozens of dudes trying to compete for her attention so you need to have good text game.

 

Really only the top 15% of male profiles are able to get enough matches to be able to go on dates on a consistent basis. If you're good looking enough, then it's probably possible for you to reach this top 15% threshold with good pictures and good text game. But if you don't have the looks, then you're only wasting your time on there.

[Soulinfected]

If you think it's easy to go on Tinder and get a date and get laid, then you are heavily misinformed...

 

Although I guess that depends on who you're asking.

 

What sucks about online dating is that it is heavily in a woman's favor. The experiences that men and women have on Tinder is completely different.

 

If you're a woman, as long as you're not obese or really ugly, then you won't have any problem getting matches. In fact, you will get so many matches you won't even know what to do with them all. Any of these online dating apps are on easy mode if you're a woman.

 

For most men, their experience is pretty much the opposite. The app really only works if you're a 7 or higher on the looks scale. If you're average or below average looking, it's a waste of time. You simply won't get enough matches to have a shot of even getting a girl to meet up with you, let alone go on consistent dates. The rule of thumb is the closer you resemble your society's physical ideal (In the USA, that's being tall, white, fit, and handsome) the more successful you will be on Tinder.

 

But even if you're good looking enough, you still need to have good pictures and good text game and you will have to deal with a **** ton of rejection. Girls who ghost you mid conversation, girls who you have a date set up with and they flake, girls who just want to boost their ego and have no intention of meeting up. It's super competitive if you're a guy because you have to remember, every single girl who's decent looking on there has dozens of dudes trying to compete for her attention so you need to have good text game.

 

Really only the top 15% of male profiles are able to get enough matches to be able to go on dates on a consistent basis. If you're good looking enough, then it's probably possible for you to reach this top 15% threshold with good pictures and good text game. But if you don't have the looks, then you're only wasting your time on there.

 

Tinder is my only means of dating these days, I generally last a few dates and end up sleeping with them most of the time, just haven't developed a relationship yet. Though I think that would be still the case if I weren't using Tinder.

 

As for the OP, good on you. Ask them all out! Too many men live in a shell of fear, and it's a numbers game. I like how you try to analyze probability too. You're using your head, even if you may be wrong. Good luck!

[GuitarGuy7]

 

As for the OP, good on you. Ask them all out! Too many men live in a shell of fear, and it's a numbers game. I like how you try to analyze probability too. You're using your head, even if you may be wrong. Good luck!

 

 

Yeah, i'll try and ask out as many as I can. I likely won't be able to ask them all out.

 

In the past, iv'e asked out 12 girls and 3 have said yes. So that means that if I ask out 8 of them, there's a good chance that at least one of them is going to say yes. And i'm pretty sure most of them are single as well.

 

Also, I have to take into account risk factor as well. For instance, the girl as work. If I were to pursue her and ask her out and I completely mess up and I wind up creeping her out, then it would have big social consequences. She might tell her fellow co-workers how much of a creep I am, it might cause me to lose friends or even lose my job. So you have to take into account that stuff.

 

Wheres if I asked out some random girl in my class and we have no common social connections, it doesn't affect me. Because even if I get rejected or worse completely mess up and creep her out, it doesn't matter because i'm never going to see her again anyways.

[Gretchen12]

Tip: Be carrying a guitar when you ask her out. It increases the chance she'll say yes (there was an experiment on this). Good luck!

[GuitarGuy7]

Tip: Be carrying a guitar when you ask her out. It increases the chance she'll say yes (there was an experiment on this). Good luck!

 

I’ll play my guitar and sing love poetry I wrote while walking my dog with a box of chocolate in my pocket.

 

The girls won’t be able to resist

[Blind-Sided]

There is good and bad in all the above.

 

 

Bad: Tinder comments.

 

 

Good: Most of the rest. LOL.

 

 

Anyway... this thread takes me back to my college days, and I figured I would throw in my 2 cents. Asking the girls from work is fine, but even though you are leaving... pick the one you are most interested in. You really don't want to get a "Desperate" vibe going on. If they talk, and one, or both say yes... and they talk after... then they may change their minds knowing they were both asked. This also goes for "The girls" in your math class. Pick one, if they are friends with each other.

 

 

College is a great time, because the things that work well in that setting, will not really work in real life. Basically you can be VERY forward, and open. As long as you don't act timid... you can get away with a lot. so.....

 

 

1) Be seen on campus!! Make sure you hang out in the food places, and if you see an empty spot in a group where you know someone from class... ask if you can join them. (not timid, but like "Hey, that seat open?) I actually had 2 different groups of girls I would sit with because of this. One group at breakfast, and one at lunch. Dinner was typically a mix of whoever was a round.

 

 

2) If there is a pool hall (billiards) or gaming place (foosball, so on) go hang there. It's easy to meet new people, and make connections when there is public gaming. I actually met my STBxW in the pool hall at school. She was chasing someone else at the time.

 

 

3) Go to any social event on campus. (dances, parties, so-on)

 

 

4) If you are smart... become a lab assistant, or campus tutor. you will meet a lot of girls, and you may impress them with your mind. (I was the physics, astronomy, and geology tutor)

 

5) Get involved in the school broadcast club. (if it exists) Even though, I was a Physics major at the time, I became a campus DJ. I had a lot of fun with this, and in turn, EVERY ONE knew who I was. And to be honest, there was a saying going around, that actually bothered my wife was.... "Everyone Loves xxxx" (insert my name for xxxx)

 

 

So... basically be outgoing and confident, but not rude, and you will be recognized. And in turn, you will have your pick. I could go out on any night, with a new girl, and most of the time, I would get "Sure, why not" from a girl. Basically, because they already knew me, even if I really didn't know them. But, since I was at the end of my collage career at the time, I picked the nice, quiet girl I thought I could spend the rest of my lif with. And up to recently, I though I had gotten that. But, she internalized everything, and killed herself inside. In turn, turning me into a monster. I guess there's nothing you can really do about that. But the advice above is sound, and works.

Edited March 29, 2019 by Blind-Sided

[GuitarGuy7]

Well I asked out the girl from the social circle, she never responded back so that was a no-go.

 

Crap

 

Anyways, on to the next.

[frus69]

If you think it's easy to go on Tinder and get a date and get laid, then you are heavily misinformed...

 

Although I guess that depends on who you're asking.

 

What sucks about online dating is that it is heavily in a woman's favor. The experiences that men and women have on Tinder is completely different.

 

If you're a woman, as long as you're not obese or really ugly, then you won't have any problem getting matches. In fact, you will get so many matches you won't even know what to do with them all. Any of these online dating apps are on easy mode if you're a woman.

 

For most men, their experience is pretty much the opposite. The app really only works if you're a 7 or higher on the looks scale. If you're average or below average looking, it's a waste of time. You simply won't get enough matches to have a shot of even getting a girl to meet up with you, let alone go on consistent dates. The rule of thumb is the closer you resemble your society's physical ideal (In the USA, that's being tall, white, fit, and handsome) the more successful you will be on Tinder.

 

But even if you're good looking enough, you still need to have good pictures and good text game and you will have to deal with a **** ton of rejection. Girls who ghost you mid conversation, girls who you have a date set up with and they flake, girls who just want to boost their ego and have no intention of meeting up. It's super competitive if you're a guy because you have to remember, every single girl who's decent looking on there has dozens of dudes trying to compete for her attention so you need to have good text game.

 

Really only the top 15% of male profiles are able to get enough matches to be able to go on dates on a consistent basis. If you're good looking enough, then it's probably possible for you to reach this top 15% threshold with good pictures and good text game. But if you don't have the looks, then you're only wasting your time on there.

 

Girls on tinder face rejection too, and most guys dont talk. and so many guys are flaky and also many dont look like their pictures.. and it's ridiculous to assume girls just automatically get tons of matches. Because if we have any standards at all, most guys arent even our types. And the really hot ones we dont get to match them either.

 

Also I have asked quite a lot of my matches how they feel about tinder, they all have hundreds of matches. Some even 500-600. So guys cant be doing that bad.

[MsJayne]

I’ll play my guitar and sing love poetry I wrote while walking my dog with a box of chocolate in my pocket.

 

The girls won’t be able to resist

 

Yeah, nah.......maybe tear off a bit of heavy metal to impress, but drop the love poetry, and definitely don't reach into your pocket and hand over a warm, overly soft chocolate - that would just send the wrongest of messages......

[basil67]

Oh MsJayne, I thought he would going to play Wonderwall for them.

 

(Still love the song, but my 19yo plays it ironically now!)

[Sunlight72]

Girls on tinder face rejection too, and most guys dont talk. and so many guys are flaky and also many dont look like their pictures.. and it's ridiculous to assume girls just automatically get tons of matches. Because if we have any standards at all, most guys arent even our types. And the really hot ones we dont get to match them either.

 

Also I have asked quite a lot of my matches how they feel about tinder, they all have hundreds of matches. Some even 500-600. So guys cant be doing that bad.

I realize this is a side note to this thread, but fyi - in real life I get about a 70% 'yes' response when I ask a woman to chat, for her number, on a date, what have you. I've tried Tinder about 8 times, between 5 days and 2 weeks each time, in 3 US cities and 2 in Europe. Swiped right on (??) 400 profiles. 2 matches. Both turned out to be scammers who wanted me to pay an adult website to see 'their preferences' before they would meet with me. I bailed at that point.

 

My ex once complained like you do that, sure she could get 30 or 40 matches in a few minutes, but they 'weren't her type' if she took the time to message with them, or the 'dozen' she went on dates with in a month period of a Tinder whirlwind effort all had some feature she was disappointed with.

 

0 actual matches after a cumulative 6 weeks on Tinder for me (a guy - 6' 3" and fit, with a very expensive smile by a very good cosmetic dentist), compared to the 'problems' my ex and you have, are two completely different worlds.Not the end of the world, but we guys aren't just imagining the different experience, it's just how it actually is.

[frus69]

But the guys I know literally get 200, 500 and 600 matches, lowest 150, with only one exception because he is quite picky (still he has some 60 matches in 2 weeks )

[Andy_K]

Also I have asked quite a lot of my matches how they feel about tinder, they all have hundreds of matches. Some even 500-600. So guys cant be doing that bad.

 

Selection bias. They all have hundreds of matches, because you're far more picky than you realise, and you're only matching guys who are extremely popular. Either that or you live in/near a big city. That makes a big difference too.

 

And if you're only matching the super popular guys... that explains why many don't talk or flake.

 

For the vast majority of average to decent looking guys outside of that top 5-10%, it's a very different experience.

Edited April 2, 2019 by Andy_K

[frus69]

I just had tinder for a month and met 7 guys, asked all of them, none has under 150. Im not in a big city not even in the US. I also don't think they are extremely popular guys because half of them I don't even like. I just think girls are really easy on tinder these days and many of them just plain want easy sex, especially the young ones. Those guys agree as well. Feels like they'd match whoever for sex....I think tinder used to be hard for guys to get matches but not anymore. Girls are more forward than guys now

[GuitarGuy7]

Update:

 

 

Girl from work:

 

I did not ask her out but I am 100% certain she would have said no based on her openly talking about going on dates with other guys and I don't think she would have been interested.

 

Other girl from work:

 

I was planning to get her Snapchat, but right as I was walking over to where she was to pull the trigger, I hesitated for a slight bit. And then 30 seconds later, she was talking to someone on the phone and I had to leave to go home. I never saw her again as we don't work the same shifts and I left the job a month later. Missed opportunity...

 

Personal Trainer:

 

I did not ask her out either, but there was a good chance she had a boyfriend since she was posing with another man as her iphone cover. Also, since she was about to graduate college, she was leaving the city and not coming back. Maybe I should have asked if she would have wanted to go do something before she left, and I honestly have no idea whether or not she would have said yes. The problem is that because she was my personal trainer, she had to be nice to me, so it was hard to tell.

 

Girl from Improv:

 

Again I did not ask her out either. I hardly ever talked to her and this is one where I probably should have went for it so this one is on me. I doubt she would have said yes, but you never know...

 

 

Girl from social circle...

 

I did not ask her out, but then again, I don't think she would have said yes. I tried talking to her on Snapchat a few times and she would leave me on read, plus her openly expressing interest in other guys while i'm around. Not to mention she was a lot taller and you know how girls don't like dating shorter guys...

 

Three girls from Music Church Group.

 

I did try talking to them and being friendly with them but I don't think any of them were interested. One straight up ignored me on social media, but I think she has a boyfriend. The other girl would frequently leave mid-conversation when I was trying to talk to her and again ignored me on Snapchat. The third girl while initially friendly might have had a boyfriend as well, but maybe I should have asked her out to see...

 

 

Girl from math class:

 

I never talked to her at all...

 

 

 

In addition, I actually asked out two girls this summer. One was a girl I met in one of my classes during the winter so I decided that I would ask her out, and she said yes.

 

So we went on a "date" and it was okay, we talked a lot, but she was going to go party and get blacked out and wasted that night and that she was spending the night at some guys house, lol. And afterwards, I texted her saying thanks for the date. She responded back with "lol that was a date? Listen dude, I just want to be friends..."

 

The second girl, just straight up friend-zoned me. I asked to go bowling with her and she kept trying to blow me off by trying to invite her friends along. So I finally just said "hey do you want to go on a date?" and that's when she responded with that she doesn't want to lead me on and wants to be friends, but also suggested that I should ask people out in person rather through the phone.

 

 

 

 

So yeah... I suck!

[Twizzlestick]

600 matches!! I wish ha. I not blowing my own trumpet, justI have been told a fair amount of times by girls at work and online I’m “handsome”. So I think I’m a reasonable looker, but no super model. Just an average good looking bloke. I’m 39 no children and have a good job. I don’t swipe on girls I don’t fancy. I have maybe 4 matches a week on high times, then no matches for 2/3 weeks then sometimes 1 match. I live in the boonies. I say that but I’m in the U.K. so nowhere is that far. Girls who live in cities just aren’t interested in some joe an hour away when they have stacks of suitors.

 

 

Interesting using dating apps as a reflection of where you “should” be aiming.

 

I’m 39 and seem to get consistent (I say consistent, I don’t mean stacks) matches with girls 27-33. I get the odd one who’s about 24 matching. They’re attractive enough. Sure I could get matches with ladies in late thirties, 40s onwards, but at this point I’m not feeling that. But never say never, someone might bowl me over in that age range.

 

I’ve realised the late twenties/early 30s bracket is where the market for me seems to be. I’m not going to match with younger, supermodels, I’m not good looking/trendy/young/ or down with social media “tending” enough - and frankly they’re a pain in the backside to talk to from my experience with that demographic at work.

Edited September 23, 2019 by Twizzlestick

[SumGuy]

The more I see of Tinder the happier I am never tried it. If I’m understanding it correctly a match is when you both swipe right? That seems so passive, and catering to the laziest kind of decision making. I can’t see it being anything more than a hook up app, thus completely about your looks and the curated image you project. Blah!

[Twizzlestick]

The more I see of Tinder the happier I am never tried it. If I’m understanding it correctly a match is when you both swipe right? That seems so passive, and catering to the laziest kind of decision making. I can’t see it being anything more than a hook up app, thus completely about your looks and the curated image you project. Blah!

 

Youve pretty much got it really. Except in U.K. it’s not really known just as a hook up app. A lot of people use it for dating. Primarily dating with the girls.

 

Prob is it’s about best of a bad bunch, which isn’t saying much for it.

 

Bumble is utter crap. Fine in principle, but it’s hobbled by an intrinsic issue with its own selling point. Women love the idea of equality, but hate talking first (as many a profile saying so is testament to) I’ve had like 3 matches and most never talk. Prob is as the bloke you are banned from talking first. So it becomes something of an impasse app.

 

POF is utter xxxxx. Worthless junk app with more flakes and attention seekers than I’ve ever seen. Send a message on there and good luck getting it read, you just join the list of 1000 other guys sending her a message. The ones you get are from bots offering you “fun”.

 

Coffee meets bagel. A whopping disappointment, at least in the U.K. outside of London and an utter pretentious bull shine of an app. It shows you a daily profile that I’ve never ever found slightly attractive. It never learns that I don’t find these people interesting, despite my constant deletes. On the “discovery” bit it’s obsessed with showing me academics that I’m physically never attracted to. I don’t know how it does it. Junk. I’ve deleted it

 

Hinge seems just ok. Nice clean format, and I do like that you can comment. Prob is it gets a waste of time chiming 100 comments when non of those girls are interested. The occasional chat I’ve started on hinge. Prob is it’s sense of distance seems a bit weird.

[normal person]

Girl from work:

 

I did not ask her out but I am 100% certain she would have said no based on her openly talking about going on dates with other guys and I don't think she would have been interested.

 

If she never gave you any indication at all that she was interested, that's when you should have known.

 

Other girl from work:

 

I was planning to get her Snapchat, but right as I was walking over to where she was to pull the trigger, I hesitated for a slight bit. [...] Missed opportunity...

 

Not a missed opportunity. You have zero reason to believe this girl has any interest in you. Maybe if she wanted your Snapchat or whatever kids do these days, it'd be a different story.

 

Personal Trainer:

 

I did not ask her out either, but there was a good chance she had a boyfriend since she was posing with another man as her iphone cover. Also, since she was about to graduate college, she was leaving the city and not coming back. Maybe I should have asked if she would have wanted to go do something before she left, and I honestly have no idea whether or not she would have said yes. The problem is that because she was my personal trainer, she had to be nice to me, so it was hard to tell.

 

You have no idea? You answered the question yourself. She has another man on her phone cover, is paid to be nice to you, is leaving the city soon, and is presumably in better shape than you. Why would you think this woman would agree to go out with you?

 

Girl from Improv:

 

Again I did not ask her out either. I hardly ever talked to her and this is one where I probably should have went for it so this one is on me. I doubt she would have said yes, but you never know...

 

This is your problem: you assume that if you don't know whether or not someone will date you blindly, that you have a decent chance of it happening. You don't. Asking a stranger who you barely ever speak to, who seemingly never gives you any hint whatsoever that she's interested in you, to spend an evening with you is not likely to end well. Would you want to have dinner with a relative stranger with whom you don't feel any interest or sexual tension? No? So why do you assume she would? I don't understand your logic.

 

Girl from social circle...

 

I did not ask her out, but then again, I don't think she would have said yes. I tried talking to her on Snapchat a few times and she would leave me on read, plus her openly expressing interest in other guys while i'm around. Not to mention she was a lot taller and you know how girls don't like dating shorter guys...

 

You should apply this thought process to the other scenarios as well. If there's no indication they're interested, they ignore you and talk about other men in front of you (and not in attempt to make you jealous), they have no interest in you. You have nothing to gain by asking them out.

 

Three girls from Music Church Group.

 

I did try talking to them and being friendly with them but I don't think any of them were interested. One straight up ignored me on social media, but I think she has a boyfriend. The other girl would frequently leave mid-conversation when I was trying to talk to her and again ignored me on Snapchat.

 

It sounds like these girls don't like you at all and would rather avoid you. Maybe instead of this "I need a girlfriend now and I don't particularly care who it is" vibe that you're most likely giving off, why don't you try to engage with people normally, without an agenda? Maybe then people won't be like this to you.

 

The third girl while initially friendly might have had a boyfriend as well, but maybe I should have asked her out to see...

 

You saved yourself from embarrassment by not asking. If her friends are ignoring you and leaving you mid conversation, they have no respect for you, and she likely feels similarly. Even if by some chance she didn't, her friends probably wouldn't be particularly open to their friend dating someone they didn't want to be around.

 

In addition, I actually asked out two girls this summer. One was a girl I met in one of my classes during the winter so I decided that I would ask her out, and she said yes.

 

So we went on a "date" and it was okay, we talked a lot, but she was going to go party and get blacked out and wasted that night and that she was spending the night at some guys house, lol. And afterwards, I texted her saying thanks for the date. She responded back with "lol that was a date? Listen dude, I just want to be friends..."

 

Why so much misunderstanding as to why it was or wasn't a date? What did you ask her and how do you think she interpreted it?

 

The second girl, just straight up friend-zoned me. I asked to go bowling with her and she kept trying to blow me off by trying to invite her friends along. So I finally just said "hey do you want to go on a date?" and that's when she responded with that she doesn't want to lead me on and wants to be friends, but also suggested that I should ask people out in person rather through the phone.

 

You would save yourself so much embarrassment if you would just read between the lines the smallest bit. If a women wants to date you, she will try to get your attention and make herself available, and not invite her friends. If she blows you off and "keeps" trying to blow you off (indicating that you didn't take the hint after multiple attempts?), what do you have to gain by continuing to try? You're just digging a deeper hole and making yourself look worse to everyone who finds out.

 

Why not just go on Tinder and Bumble like everyone else? When you match with someone you know they're interested in going out with you so don't have to take these embarrassing shots in the dark like you've been doing. That eliminates all this guesswork that you don't seem to have a handle of yet. It'd make your life a lot easier.