If someone doesn’t make eye cintact with you, a hint they dont want to talk to you?

[Highroller107]

At work yesterday, I was sitting outside the lunch room looking at my phone, reading. One of the security guards said hi, I said hi back, then he told me,” everytime when I see you, you’re always sooo quiet.” I’m like wth? Well, duh it’s because I’m on my smartphone, does it look like I want to be bothered on my break time? Now, if I saw someone who looked busy and was occupied with a book or on their phones, I wouldn’t bother them unless they looked up and gave me eye contact. Now I have to avoid this guard before I hear anymore annoying comments about what I do on my breaks

[d0nnivain]

People don't see looking at your phone as a go away sign anymore, because some people look at the phone when they don't have anything better to do.

 

I think the guard was just being friendly. Instead of avoiding him, give him a quick acknowledging nod when you see him but don't speak. If you recognize his humanity, he will probably leave you in peace.

[Wallysbears]

The guard is probably just looking for a pleasant acknowledgement. Often people in those roles go completely unnoticed and not spoken to by the very same people they’re protecting all day, every day.

 

Can’t hurt to smile, say hi and take a moment to ask how their day is or tell them to have a great afternoon.

[alphamale]

At work yesterday, I was sitting outside the lunch room looking at my phone, reading. One of the security guards said hi, I said hi back, then he told me,” everytime when I see you, you’re always sooo quiet.” I’m like wth? Well, duh it’s because I’m on my smartphone, does it look like I want to be bothered on my break time? Now, if I saw someone who looked busy and was occupied with a book or on their phones, I wouldn’t bother them unless they looked up and gave me eye contact. Now I have to avoid this guard before I hear anymore annoying comments about what I do on my breaks

 

everyone's level of reading non-verbal cues is different. some ppl are very good at it and some ppl are not. there is a reason why this clown is a security guard probably making $11/hr

[preraph]

You should be glad someone is being nice to you when they don't have to. He's just a friendly guy and likely part of his job is to get to where he kind of knows the people he works to protect. You seem overly defensive.

[lolita888]

He probably thought you have no friends or lonely and bored but have no one to talk to so you ended up using your phone. He was just being nice. Hopefully you didn't return it with mean remarks.

[basil67]

Highroller, you've frequently commented about not having many friends and being miserable in your life. If this is your reaction to a security guard making an innocent comment, it's no surprise you find yourself in this position.

 

Imagine if you'd responded in a positive way....could you have ended up having a nice conversation? Perhaps made a new work friend? This kind of stuff is the secret to having a happier life.

[Highroller107]

I guess he was just being friendly, but I don’t owe him anything if I don’t want to. And I didn’t respond rudely, I replied, “yeah, I sure am.” With a few laughs near the end. I’m not sure I’m looking for a new “work friend” considering he’s probably 60 years old. The last time I was “friendly” to a security guard He thought I was hitting on him after I repeatly told him I wasn’t interested, he was pestering/harassing me whatever you call it and all because I was friendly to him-which opened doors. It works both ways, what If i went up to someone and started talking to them and they gave me a cold shoulder? They don’t owe me anything either

[basil67]

Of course you don't owe him anything....I simply suggested being friendly because it's nice to have positive interactions in our day and could give you a boost.

[CautiouslyOptimistic]

Are you generally regarded as an unfriendly person?

[preraph]

Well, don't act inappropriate with them, just polite and friendly. Don't judge this one by that other one. If they start inching towards something inappropriate, tell them, I am very happy with my boyfriend. If they continue to get inappropriate, then you can take an attitude with them or just embarrass them out loud by saying loudly for all to hear, ARE YOU COMING ON TO ME, FLOYD????

[d0nnivain]

There is a way to acknowledge somebody else's humanity without coming across as being anything other than polite.

 

While you don't owe people anything, the world is generally a better place if you can be kind.

[Highroller107]

There is a way to acknowledge somebody else's humanity without coming across as being anything other than polite.

 

While you don't owe people anything, the world is generally a better place if you can be kind.

 

I’ll be polite but not too “friendly” in a flirting way from now on

[amaysngrace]

It’s good you’re setting the scene before it plays out. Most times we think it’ll be way worse than it actually will be but it’s smart to be prepared in case it does go the other way instead.