djo51315 Posted March 7, 2019 Posted March 7, 2019 I went to a mall the other day, and at one of the shops I went to I met this girl who was working as a sales floor person. Usually I don't ask retail workers anything and just go about my business, but I notice this girl staring at me from the corner of my eye and we locked eyes a few times, so she came over to me and made the first move on starting conversation. This then went on to make what was originally a 5 minute visit, to a 45 minute conversation, and I loved every second I was with her. Something just really made us connect, and I could tell she felt the same. The 5 or 6 people I was with were all telling me that she was the perfect fit for me, and even at one point in our little thing, Zodiac Signs were brought up and I mentioned I'm a Cancer and she started going off on a little thing about how she loves Cancers and then said something like "Oohh, Cancer sexy sexy". I was too nervous to go for her number or anything and when we headed out my friend ran back and started talking the girl at this store about relationships and she said she was Bi, she has a girlfriend. Idk what to do cause I wanna go back for her number but I know that's kinda wrong of me to try and kind of to inject myself into her life and potentially cause something bad to happen to her relationship now. I'm also conflicted cause you could tell she was definitely into me and also started our conversation and she was telling me all about the music she listened to and her pet fish, I feel like she really wanted me and I wanna go back to shoot that shot but I feel scummy for approaching her when she has a girlfriend. 1
crispytoast Posted March 7, 2019 Posted March 7, 2019 If you had a crazy deep connection like that, I say go for it and see where it goes. You never know, you might end up with two girlfriends.
d0nnivain Posted March 7, 2019 Posted March 7, 2019 Bi doesn't necessarily mean poly or into open relationships. If she has a GF & they are committed she is not available to date you. You recognize that by asking for her # & interjecting yourself into her life you are at minimum inviting her to upend her present relationship for you. Perhaps shop at that store more then you presently do. In time she may let it slip that she & the GF broke up. Then you can get her #, not before.
smackie9 Posted March 7, 2019 Posted March 7, 2019 She prob thought you were cute and what better way to make a boring work day go faster. I think she was just being social, enjoying the attention like most girls do. Don't read too much into it. I think you got more out of it than she did. Remember girls don't have to have romantic feelings to enjoy a conversation with a guy for 45 mins. 1
Author djo51315 Posted March 7, 2019 Author Posted March 7, 2019 She prob thought you were cute and what better way to make a boring work day go faster. I think she was just being social, enjoying the attention like most girls do. Don't read too much into it. I think you got more out of it than she did. Remember girls don't have to have romantic feelings to enjoy a conversation with a guy for 45 mins. That's exactly what I was thinking, usually that's my first conclusion when these situations happen, I think what really has got me hooked on it is the fact that like my 5 other friends with me kept telling me that she was definitely into me, and some things she said seemed very flirty, but then again maybe that's just her personality, it's hard to tell.
Normm Posted March 7, 2019 Posted March 7, 2019 You're putting entirely too much weight into an arbitrary designation based on the alignment of planets 100s of millions of miles away at the time you both emerged from your respective birth canals.
Author djo51315 Posted March 7, 2019 Author Posted March 7, 2019 It's really hard to tell like with all of you saying, perhaps it could just be her personality and she wanted to be social. Maybe it was something further, my ex and I got together the same way, where she was seeing someone else when we first started talking and meeting. It's just hard to tell, maybe she's similar to me where she is down for a poly relationship when the opportunity arises. I guess the only way to know is to chase the opportunity, I won't know till I try, and it's not like I have to see her again?
Author djo51315 Posted March 7, 2019 Author Posted March 7, 2019 You're putting entirely too much weight into an arbitrary designation based on the alignment of planets 100s of millions of miles away at the time you both emerged from your respective birth canals. I'm not putting weight into us working out into astrology, I was only pointing it out cause it came up in out conversation and she used it as a way to say she was into me and call me sexy 1
Normm Posted March 7, 2019 Posted March 7, 2019 I'm not putting weight into us working out into astrology, I was only pointing it out cause it came up in out conversation and she used it as a way to say she was into me and call me sexy In that case I'm all for Astrology. 1
crispytoast Posted March 7, 2019 Posted March 7, 2019 Bi doesn't necessarily mean poly or into open relationships. If she has a GF & they are committed she is not available to date you. You recognize that by asking for her # & interjecting yourself into her life you are at minimum inviting her to upend her present relationship for you. Perhaps shop at that store more then you presently do. In time she may let it slip that she & the GF broke up. Then you can get her #, not before. Meeting someone cool that you would date doesn't automatically mean that the only way you can enjoy that person's company is by dating them. If she's in a committed relationship, so what? Also, the LBGT community tends to be more open minded in more ways than one. Its not so unlikely for them to be in some sort of open arrangement. And if they are both bi, I really would not be surprised if they poach men together. They might not. Who knows? There's nothing wrong with him testing the waters as long as he's respectful to what he may find.
Author djo51315 Posted March 7, 2019 Author Posted March 7, 2019 Meeting someone cool that you would date doesn't automatically mean that the only way you can enjoy that person's company is by dating them. If she's in a committed relationship, so what? Also, the LBGT community tends to be more open minded in more ways than one. Its not so unlikely for them to be in some sort of open arrangement. And if they are both bi, I really would not be surprised if they poach men together. They might not. Who knows? There's nothing wrong with him testing the waters as long as he's respectful to what he may find. I agree with what you said about not requiring to have her romantically atm, and every girl I've dated in the past has been bi and also been into open relationships, I'm just not completely sure how I should approach a situation like that? She's clearly into me and she definitely knows I'm into her, I think I'm gonna go back in like a week and tell her something like "I know you're seeing someone but I think we clicked really well the other day, wanna hang out sometime?" Or something along those lines
d0nnivain Posted March 7, 2019 Posted March 7, 2019 As long as you are not going there with the specific intent to get her to cheat or to break up her existing relationship, contact is fine. I'd still play it cool & do what I initially suggested. . . .go to the store a lot more to establish a rapport with her.
Author djo51315 Posted March 12, 2019 Author Posted March 12, 2019 Okay, so update. I went back there on Sunday again to try to find the courage to ask her for a number or something (I couldn't do it, again, I get anxiety like crazy for some reason), but this time when I saw her she showed even more signs of being "into me", when she I walked into the store, she yelled excitedly getting my attention and the whole time I was in the store she seemed to gravitate towards me, my friends noticed it too, she seemed to not be paying attention to any other customers and she wanted to help me pick it and outfit and everything. A few times when I was just browsing with my friends I noticed her talking quietly with some of her coworkers and they seemed to keep peeking at me, and when this girl rung me out, she said "You're like, my favorite person" and then "I'm so glad you're coming here more often." I can feel a connection but I still don't know what to make of this whole girlfriend thing, maybe it was to throw my friend off from asking her a bunch of questions? Or maybe she wants me to ask myself, rather than a friend coming in and doing it?
rightondude Posted March 12, 2019 Posted March 12, 2019 dude you came up with the perfect opening line: "I know you're seeing someone but I think we clicked really well the other day, wanna hang out sometime?" NOW USE IT! 1
preraph Posted March 12, 2019 Posted March 12, 2019 Decomplicate things. Go in there without your friends. You are manufacturing excuses and looking for reasons not to ask her out. Just hand her your phone number and write on there "Text me sometime!"
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