Lagoon1212 Posted February 28, 2019 Posted February 28, 2019 I have a post about this guy. Long story short, I accused him of wanting only sex from me, he denied it. At first, he was texting me everyday and he was making plans to go out, but since the drama started he would reach out once in three days. He told me that he has no expectations and would like to get to know me and we might or might not work out. By that time, I already gave up too, and decided to just relax and go with the flow. He apologized he made me feel like sex was all he wanted because that wasnt true and told me he thinks abput me a lot when we are not together. On Sunday night, I went over to his house and we had sex for the first time (we met two months ago). Honestly, chemistry and sexual energy wasnt as strong as before, but I still had fun. I left on Monday morning and didnt hear from him the entire day (I was ok with that, I prepared myself that it was a possibility). On Tuesday afternoon, he texted me askkng about my day. I replied and asked “hows your day going so far?” Never got a response. It is Thursday today. I am confused, why then initiating. And we are talking about a guy who is in his early 30s and who told me sex is not all he wants because he is not in his 20s anymore. I dont care if sex was all he wanted... I just can’t believe he reached out only to ignore me. That seems very high school like to me. Any ideas?
stillafool Posted February 28, 2019 Posted February 28, 2019 Why would you tell him that sex is all he wanted and then go to his house and have sex? It seems you two were on the same page if you ask me. He is looking for a girlfriend but he isn't going to settle until he finds the right person. You should have the same frame of mind.
Author Lagoon1212 Posted February 28, 2019 Author Posted February 28, 2019 Why would you tell him that sex is all he wanted and then go to his house and have sex? It seems you two were on the same page if you ask me. He is looking for a girlfriend but he isn't going to settle until he finds the right person. You should have the same frame of mind. Because at first I liked him a lot, but his behaviour started annoying me and I stopped caring anymore. Last time I had sex was in July 2018 (my last bf) so I went to his house with the mindset whatever happens happens. Why is it bad?
smackie9 Posted February 28, 2019 Posted February 28, 2019 Tip: guys will do or say anything to get laid. 3
Author Lagoon1212 Posted February 28, 2019 Author Posted February 28, 2019 Tip: guys will do or say anything to get laid. Ok, I knew that. It is not like I believed him, I looked more at his actions rather than words. My question is about ignoring my text. He reached out, asked me a question. I replied and asked one in return and now it is a radiosilence
damni Posted February 28, 2019 Posted February 28, 2019 Ok, I knew that. It is not like I believed him, I looked more at his actions rather than words. My question is about ignoring my text. He reached out, asked me a question. I replied and asked one in return and now it is a radiosilence You look at actions more than words yet you knew by his actions that he was pulling away and you still slept with him. 2
stillafool Posted February 28, 2019 Posted February 28, 2019 No it's not bad that you wanted sex and had it. Why is it bad that he needs sex and wanted it? He didn't reply to your text because you are not a priority to him.
Author Lagoon1212 Posted February 28, 2019 Author Posted February 28, 2019 You look at actions more than words yet you knew by his actions that he was pulling away and you still slept with him. Yes, because I knew that if he disappears after sex it wont affect me since I lost interest in a relationship with him. It just became too much work. But I am still attracted to him physically so...
preraph Posted February 28, 2019 Posted February 28, 2019 I think he just sent that text do let you know he was being polite but has no desire to have a texting marathon in between dates.
jess060191 Posted February 28, 2019 Posted February 28, 2019 Tip: guys will do or say anything to get laid. What smackie9 said.
jess060191 Posted February 28, 2019 Posted February 28, 2019 Sounds like he sent that text by doing the bare minimum to keep the door open for the next time he wants to get laid by you. If you are okay with that type of relationship than I wouldn't worry about why he hasn't responded yet.
edgygirl Posted February 28, 2019 Posted February 28, 2019 Guys feel bad after having sex when they know they lost interest. So sometimes they send one message to feel less guilty. And then realize it’s stupid to do that and stop responding when you get back to them. Typical! Next! 2
Author Lagoon1212 Posted February 28, 2019 Author Posted February 28, 2019 I think he just sent that text do let you know he was being polite but has no desire to have a texting marathon in between dates. Thank you preraph, you are the first one who actually answered the question in this thread.
Author Lagoon1212 Posted February 28, 2019 Author Posted February 28, 2019 Guys feel bad after having sex when they know they lost interest. So sometimes they send one message to feel less guilty. And then realize it’s stupid to do that and stop responding when you get back to them. Typical! Next! That makes sense.
olivetree Posted February 28, 2019 Posted February 28, 2019 You clearly can see that he's not that into you if you felt the need to accuse him of only wanting sex. And the actions you have outlined back that up - he doesn't seem that into this. I would stop analyzing and just move on if you want a serious relationship. 1
smackie9 Posted February 28, 2019 Posted February 28, 2019 This what I have been told...guys don't message back because they don't want to.
Author Lagoon1212 Posted February 28, 2019 Author Posted February 28, 2019 This what I have been told...guys don't message back because they don't want to. But I didnt initiate texting. It was he who reached out. I responded three hours later (I was at work) and I was just beong polite and asked a question in return but nothing from him... I would have understood if I reached out first, but he wanted to ghost me after sex.
frus69 Posted February 28, 2019 Posted February 28, 2019 I understand how you feel. You are not looking for a relationship with him but he's hot so you wouldn't mind having fun with him and you still want him to like you too so being ignored is not a good feeling. I had guys sent me texts after sex too and I also feel he may justwant to be polite. In fact it's happening to me right now. I don't think he wants to see me regularly , he is just being nice and dont want to nail and bail? but let's see if I will see him again lol
Author Lagoon1212 Posted February 28, 2019 Author Posted February 28, 2019 I understand how you feel. You are not looking for a relationship with him but he's hot so you wouldn't mind having fun with him and you still want him to like you too so being ignored is not a good feeling. I had guys sent me texts after sex too and I also feel he may justwant to be polite. In fact it's happening to me right now. I don't think he wants to see me regularly , he is just being nice and dont want to nail and bail? but let's see if I will see him again lol The idea of being polite seems like an explanation, but it would be more polite if he reallllly had to reach out to say something like hey I had fun last night. Have a nice day, bla bla. Asking a question about my day leaves an impression that he is interested in what’s going on with me and of course he can expect me to ask the same in return. So, ignoring my question (after I replied to his) just seems very rude not polite. Sorry you are going through similar situation. I think for me, it is an ego thing now.
edgygirl Posted February 28, 2019 Posted February 28, 2019 What did you want him to say? Asking about your day is the least “offensive” thing someone who’s lost interest can say. If he was interested he’d say something like - I had a great time last night, let’s plan to meet soon. You’re overthinking like we all do in these situations, and trying to read into a word here and there when you shouldn’t. Go get busy with something else (gym, girlfriends, movie) and try to stop thinking about him. If he comes back, you can decide what to do. He probably won’t. Words mean nothing. Actions mean something. In any case if he wanted to keep going he’d be more “eager” to respond etc. Find some other guys to talk with to take your mind and ego off of it. Sometimes it’s just not supposed to be. Hugs OP. Asking a question about my day leaves an impression that he is interested in what’s going on with me and of course he can expect me to ask the same in return.
frus69 Posted February 28, 2019 Posted February 28, 2019 Yes I understand it's an ego thing. You still want to feel desired and wanted even though you aren't interested in a relationship with the man. He sent a text cuz he doesn't want to look like a jerk. But he wasn't gonna go full length to have a conversation with you in order to not look like a jerk. Also he isnt that interested and keep replying will give you a wrong idea. He could have answered your text once, twice, three times but doesnt matter eventually he will fade out. Also I think some men believe leaving text unanswered is like leaving the door open to your bed. If I remember right, it happened before right? You guys arranged a date but he took ages to get back to you? Hes probably doing the same this time.
Tacticalegg Posted February 28, 2019 Posted February 28, 2019 I can say I have just not replied before because I just didn't feel like it him not replying doesn't mean much as far as getting laid there aren't many guys that just want sex but in this case it does sound like he isnt worth it So sorry..
Author Lagoon1212 Posted February 28, 2019 Author Posted February 28, 2019 Yes I understand it's an ego thing. You still want to feel desired and wanted even though you aren't interested in a relationship with the man. He sent a text cuz he doesn't want to look like a jerk. But he wasn't gonna go full length to have a conversation with you in order to not look like a jerk. Also he isnt that interested and keep replying will give you a wrong idea. He could have answered your text once, twice, three times but doesnt matter eventually he will fade out. Also I think some men believe leaving text unanswered is like leaving the door open to your bed. If I remember right, it happened before right? You guys arranged a date but he took ages to get back to you? Hes probably doing the same this time. No, he was pretty good (sometimes it does take him few hours to respond but again, he is busy at work). When it comes to dates he was pretty good about it, showing on time, communicating well. The only thing that irked me from the beginning was him stirring ALL our dates towards sex (a bar close to my house, a proposal to come over and bring a bottle of wine, meeting me at a bar, then telling me his knee hurts and if I had ice at home, asking me to come to his place at the end of our date). I turned down all of these, but I also became slightly depressed about the whole situation and less enthusiastic when replying to his texts. Then he pulled away (texting me once in few days), and then I decided this was not going to lead to something serious.
Tacticalegg Posted February 28, 2019 Posted February 28, 2019 I mean if your after a fling stay with him if you want something serious end it keep your options open how much do you like him?
Recommended Posts