anxiety_aerial Posted February 27, 2019 Posted February 27, 2019 I recently met a girl from a different University, and I even got her number. I was heading off to home from my parttime job and I met her at the bus. We talked during the bus ride to the train station, and my God is she interesting! We have a lot of things in common, communicate well and so forth. After I got her number, I called her with the question if she would like to get coffee sometime, she replied the day after with saying that she's sorry for the late reply, and can't attend for coffee this week due deadlines from school (this week). Maybe next time she says. Should I ask her again next week? Or should I wait for her to tell me when she has time.
d0nnivain Posted February 27, 2019 Posted February 27, 2019 Reach out next week but if she doesn't say yes, assume she's not interested.
jerik007 Posted February 27, 2019 Posted February 27, 2019 (edited) This is an excellent way to minimize the natural jitters that come with a first date (for BOTH you and her). While you’ll NEVER really get rid of all those fluttering butterflies, you’ll have an easier time focusing on HER and have a good time all around. After all, the point of going on a date is to ENJOY her company, and not treat it like it was a job interview where you have to prove yourself to her. Don’t fall into that NEEDY mindset. Furthermore, innovative first dates like these happen to be VERY budget-friendly. NOT that I’m saying you should be a cheapskate, but splurging right at the beginning screws up the courtship process. This isn’t about doing the ‘pulling-out-all-the-stops’ kind of stuff, but rather doing them at the RIGHT TIME. In her mind, these things will have way more impact and value if they’re given as a reward rather than something that doesn’t need to be earned. Besides, romance has a much easier time to blossom when you’re not projecting any expectations. (I’m not saying though that it’s not possible for the sparks to fly so early on’) In case that it does, your lucky date will feel like it’s the most NATURAL thing in the world because she wasn’t FORCED into it. Bottom line: avoid making a huge production out of the first date. With that said however, going on a low-pressure date doesn’t mean you shouldn’t plant subtle hints of romance in her head. But we’ll save that for later ‘ right now, let’s talk about setting up the first date. I’m assuming at this point that you’ve already made initial contact with her (either through your friends or on your own) and have obtained that ever-important phone number.Read my article for my full advice about setting up that first date.https://menontop.home.blog/2019/02/27/how-to-meet-women-that-are-not-online-dating/ Edited February 27, 2019 by jerik007 addition
preraph Posted February 27, 2019 Posted February 27, 2019 I'm of the school that a woman would make time for coffee given a week's time if she was interested. But you may as well ask her again or see if she contacts you being friendly but then you'll have to just let it go if she doesn't. 1
leigh01 Posted February 28, 2019 Posted February 28, 2019 I agree with preraph, but maybe she really does have a lot of deadlines and she may work too. Give it one more go, and if she turns you down again, I would say its a no.
alphamale Posted February 28, 2019 Posted February 28, 2019 Should I ask her again next week? Or should I wait for her to tell me when she has time. if she was really into you she would have said yes the first time you asked. I would drop it but if you want you can try again, but keep your expectations low. alpha 2
I'veseenbetterlol Posted February 28, 2019 Posted February 28, 2019 We have a lot of things in common, communicate well and so forth. After I got her number, I called her with the question if she would like to get coffee sometime, she replied the day after with saying that she's sorry for the late reply, and can't attend for coffee this week due deadlines from school (this week). Maybe next time she says. She really doesn't sound interested, esp the maybe later part. You will notice interested people will act different. First off she wouldn't take awhile to respond and she wouldn't be too busy. 1
Author anxiety_aerial Posted February 28, 2019 Author Posted February 28, 2019 I'm of the school that a woman would make time for coffee given a week's time if she was interested. But you may as well ask her again or see if she contacts you being friendly but then you'll have to just let it go if she doesn't. Yeah she's currently heading for her 2nd Master's degree for Geo Engineering if I'm not mistaken. I would understand if she doesn't have the time to meet this week. But she seemed so interested when we just met. I suppose I'll try to text her next week with the question how her deadlines went, as well as asking if she's still interested in doing something. 1
Author anxiety_aerial Posted February 28, 2019 Author Posted February 28, 2019 if she was really into you she would have said yes the first time you asked. I would drop it but if you want you can try again, but keep your expectations low. alpha She did actually say that she would like to see me again right at the train station when she gave me her number (just before heading off). This was just an inconvenient moment where she was busy, I suppose. But you're right, I'll keep my expectations low since I don't want to worry at all.
preraph Posted February 28, 2019 Posted February 28, 2019 Maybe it will turn out okay! Give her one more chance.
Author anxiety_aerial Posted March 1, 2019 Author Posted March 1, 2019 Maybe it will turn out okay! Give her one more chance. I definitely will. Still wondering whether I should text her next week or wait for her to reach out. I've been thinking to send a message like: "Hey, how did the deadlines go? I bet you finished them on time!"
Author anxiety_aerial Posted March 5, 2019 Author Posted March 5, 2019 Maybe it will turn out okay! Give her one more chance. Well, unfortunately I didn't receive anything back from Monday (I texted her with the question how her week went). I suppose it was a nice try and a confidence boost for me to try and date again after a whole year.
preraph Posted March 5, 2019 Posted March 5, 2019 Oh, sorry. Can't imagine why she gave you her number and then didn't follow through. Unless she's still overwhelmed with classes or something. Anyway, don't recontact. If that's the case, she can answer later.
Author anxiety_aerial Posted March 5, 2019 Author Posted March 5, 2019 Oh, sorry. Can't imagine why she gave you her number and then didn't follow through. Unless she's still overwhelmed with classes or something. Anyway, don't recontact. If that's the case, she can answer later. Yeah she might have been overwhelmed. It's perfectly fine! I wish her the best, and whenever she has time, she can definitely contact me to catch up or something. Thanks for the replies 1
alphamale Posted March 5, 2019 Posted March 5, 2019 Yeah she might have been overwhelmed. It's perfectly fine! I wish her the best, and whenever she has time, she can definitely contact me to catch up or something. and when she does finally contact you, you can tell her to get lost!
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