jms Posted September 19, 2005 Posted September 19, 2005 My girlfriend and I have been dating 2 1/2 years. I posted on this forum over the summer regarding a breakup we were going through while she was away in California, but I ended up visiting her and we got back together. In any event its about 2 months now into what I guess you could call the "Second Chance" phase of our relationship and things have been going alright. We still fight a moderate amount, and there are a lot of trust issues on her part but I always hoped we could eventually just work them all up. This past Friday we were at a fraternity party of mine and one thing lead to another and she hit broadside me in the face while I was talking to one of my brothers - gave me a bloody nose - and stormed off. Needless to say, I had her escorted off property while I tended to my nose and we haven't really spoken since. She never really offered an explanation for what she did, but from what I gather from the people who escorted her out of the party she was upset because one of her girlfriends apparently accused me of dancing inappropriately with her. I’m stuck in this situation where I know what happened was totally wrong, and I (let alone anybody) don’t deserve to be treated like that – but I can’t figure out what I should do. I don’t hate her, and the thought of not being in a relationship with her makes me really sad. On the other hand though, I’m really embarrassed about the fact that this happened in front of just about everyone I know and I don’t want people to view me as some kind of “battered wife.” Am I being ridiculous; is this situation cut and dry? Or is it not insane for me to be considering her feelings, and the possibility of us not breaking up after this?
Craig Posted September 19, 2005 Posted September 19, 2005 If she hit you once chances are she'll hit you again. Chances are that she thinks it's okay to hit a man. Not all women are like her though. Drop her and move on to the next girl. If there is a next time that you get hit by your SO call the police and report it. There is no excuse for violence like that and people that do violence to others need a wake up call. Besides if you had hit your gf like she hit you, you would more than likely been arrested, booked, held in jail, charged and then bailed out while awaiting trial.
Outcast Posted September 19, 2005 Posted September 19, 2005 from what I gather from the people who escorted her out of the party she was upset because one of her girlfriends apparently accused me of dancing inappropriately with her. So apparently she thinks it's perfectly all right to hit someone hard enough to cause injury as a way of expressing her displeasure. Forget this girl and move on. She's got big troubles that won't be fixed anytime soon.
morrigan Posted September 19, 2005 Posted September 19, 2005 Besides if you had hit your gf like she hit you, you would more than likely been arrested, booked, held in jail, charged and then bailed out while awaiting trial. It's a bad sign when someone feels they have the right to hurt you physically, regardless if it's a man or a woman. If she currently reacts this way due to her jealousy, how would she react during arguments if you both were married or living together? Ask yourself that anytime you think about wanting to get involved with her again.
whichwayisup Posted September 19, 2005 Posted September 19, 2005 I agree with the others, forget her and move on. She's high maitenance and obviously handles her anger in ways she shouldn't. She was so wrong to smack you in the face like that. No matter what you did to piss her off, you didn't deserve that!
Dean3922 Posted September 19, 2005 Posted September 19, 2005 Second chances rarely work because all of the issues that broke you up will resurface again. I would end this relationship. You can learn to love another and you also learn from your past relationships. Take that knowledge into your next one.
stowe Posted September 19, 2005 Posted September 19, 2005 totally inexcusable -- it is NEVER ok to hit ANYONE under ANY circumstances. if she ever contacts you, i hope that's all you are going to say to her.
quankanne Posted September 19, 2005 Posted September 19, 2005 as much as you care about this girl, and as much as you want to see things through, you seriously need to reconsider your relationship with her. While striking you might be an out-of-character action, it's not a far reach to say that she feels physical abuse is acceptable in a relationship. It's not; hitting or slapping or hurting someone -- no matter how much that person professes to love and care for you -- is not healthy nor does it reflect a sense of respect for a relationship. looks of death or heated discussions about questionable behavior (yours or hers) is normal, hitting is not.
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