Who broke my girlfriend (Girlfriends Personality)

[LazyLibra]

Well i've found help on this site, By reading others posts and posting my own. So i figure since this site is 3 for 3 in solving my problems, I'll give it a shot! The perfect record is on the line!

 

Anyways, I guess it isn't really a "problem" in the sense it means life or death of my relationship.

 

ok first off lets describe tyson (My, Lazy libra) Well i'm a libra and in all senses my sign describes me perfectly. I hate confrontation, I love to take a diplomatic role in all people problems, My friends come to me for help and i tend to help them all the time! however I wish solving my own problems would be as easy. I'm the type of guy who will go out of his way to make people happy! Often putting others before myself, I need everyone to like me! Otherwise i will analyze myself and try to find a problem in me that has caused this person to hate me. I'm a sensitive guy, I put the women in my life first because i believe that Men are to take care of women and cherish them. I would say i'm a "MOMMAS BOY" She's the love of my life, I wouldn't be anywhere without her. I even have a Mother Tattoo! haha basically i got into a bad car accident when i was 17, a drunk driver hit my car and i almost died. She stayed by my side for weeks in the hospital. She quit her job and took care of me. I honestly knew i would of died if it wasn't for her. there were days where i felt myself dying and she would yell at me not to give up and i had to fight. 2 months later i was healthy as a horse, I was still sore with many ribs broken but her support and faith in me connected me to her. I feel i owe her my life. She gave me life twice in my lifetime and that's a special thing. ok off with th emushy stuff. I never used to be this way! before the accident i objectified women, didn't care for them and used them for sex, The only thing i believed they were good for. After the Injuries my mom and i got close. I would get so angry and violent to anyone who expressed any hostility towards her.So much so that i went as far as to punch a guy in the face for calling her a stupid bitch in starbucks, just because she took his drink by mistake. I've gotten alot better after that day, that was just months after i got out of the hospital after that happened. Now everytime i go out with a girl i treat her the way i would want my mom to be treated. So i can see how this all relates to one another. I just feel that you can be gone from this world any second and life is too precious to hide your feelings.

 

So you get an idea of where i'm coming from. In a nutshell i'm a Caring guy that will never be accused of being unappreciative.

 

Now the "PROBLEM", All my other girlfriends have been "typical" girls. Very clingy and very vocal about their feelings! they love to get mushy! And I like it that way, I need to feel accepted and appreciated or the self analyzation occurs.

 

So this new girl chelsea is different. I've been dating her for 2 weeks, but i've known her for awhile. The problem i see is She has a problem expressing herself. To me i feel she has been burnt in the past so is affraid of being hurt, She is also very shy.The first piece of evidence is she doesn't like looking me in the eyes, She gets shy. So this indicates to me she has low self confidence, She also doesn't like me calling her pretty or beautiful, she just giggles and tells me to shutup! Sometimes she will mumble "I miss you" or "you're so hot" or "I really like you" but when i ask for her to repeat it she just mumbles again. It's like she's affraid to open herself up. She also has a hard time asking me to hang out! she's affraid of being too needy or high maintenence, i think. I'm starting to pick up on body language and habits she displays. like when she comes at me looking down all shy and holds me what seems like forever and makes these (what i call) happy noises.

 

now onto what i want from you good people, Do you think she can open up to me down the road? Or will i just have to learn a new language in order to get the things i need?

 

I also wanna know, WHO BROKE MY GIRLFRIEND! I bet you some guy treated her like a sextoy and just abused her. poor thing. I just hope my kind heart and loving nature can break the curse that scrub has cast on her.

 

I'll attach picture so you can get alittle idea of who you're talking to. It might make it easier

 

[housebaby]

Hi there.

 

I noticed that you tell us about your sign and it's significance in your nature. I also noticed that you didn't tell us HER sign - it may play a role (if you believe in that stuff -which I do).

 

Not all girls are as vocal about feelings - especially right of the get go! We are not all stereotypes, you have to look at people as individuals with different characteristics (mentally, physically, emotionally).

 

Some people are just naturally shy - and may not have been bombarded with compliments, and don't exactly know how to recieve them; and some people are MODEST and don't live off of the compliments/acceptance of others.

 

Maybe you should just ease up on throwing around compliments until there is a valid opportunity to give them - like she gets all dressed up and polished for a dinner date, or something (you can seem shallow if you just throw compliments out there - it may seem like all you want is for them reciprocated). Compliment her on other things - sense of humor, intelligence, etc....they seem alot more sincere.

 

I wouldn't freak out yet, assuming she's "broken" -- she just doesn't seem as needy ... maybe she's just very secure and doesn't require compliments to feel good.

 

Hope that helps.

[LazyLibra]

housebaby,

 

 

All you said is very true. I just find women more beautiful when they are Casual, you know sweat pants, Tshirt etc no makeup. She is a collegestudent and she just wears normal relaxing clothes around campus. She doesn't like to go out much so she never really dresses up.

 

I think i might lay back on the compliments and just observe her. maybe let her open up to me? I know she's capable of it she just needs to say it louder and clearer haha not mumbling.

 

She's a VIRGO by the way. I understand they are more of a Perfectionist and like to take time and analyze things before jumping in. Which in this case seems true. So It would be smart of me to take your advice.

[housebaby]

I FIGURED!

 

I am also a Virgo - and in some ways the same. I'm not exactly what you would call "shy" (in most situations)...but I am more of an observer than an extrovert when it comes to romance. I am very private, and don't really like to discuss things as much as think about them....she may be the same way!

 

I'm sure she likes to get compliments - but sometimes when people over do it, or say too much it makes me question how easily they throw compliments around and therefore conclude that they are insincere (not always the case).

 

It's like everything else: too much is not good - but none is worse!

 

I think you have very good intentions - and you are right, we virgos like to make sure we don't throw ourselves out there...make sure there is some validity to our feelings before expressing them freely.

 

Good Luck!

[JS17]

She will open up to you if you prove that it's safe for her to do so. Tell her that you want to know how she feels about something but that you'll let her tell you in her own time. When she does express her feelings, don't judge her, don't yell at her, don't get freaked out, don't get angry. Being a good listener is really important. Make her feel secure when she does express her feelings to you. Start out with small things and start gradually asking for deeper feelings.

 

Also, it's only two weeks. You have to give her more time. Most people don't reveal their innermost feelings in the first 2 weeks of a relationship.

[LazyLibra]

I FIGURED!

 

I am also a Virgo - and in some ways the same. I'm not exactly what you would call "shy" (in most situations)...but I am more of an observer than an extrovert when it comes to romance. I am very private, and don't really like to discuss things as much as think about them....she may be the same way!

 

I'm sure she likes to get compliments - but sometimes when people over do it, or say too much it makes me question how easily they throw compliments around and therefore conclude that they are insincere (not always the case).

 

It's like everything else: too much is not good - but none is worse!

 

I think you have very good intentions - and you are right, we virgos like to make sure we don't throw ourselves out there...make sure there is some validity to our feelings before expressing them freely.

 

Good Luck!

 

Housebaby,

 

I tend to over do it. but like you said my intentions are good in nature.

I would not really match myself with a virgo, I had the longest/best relationships with aquarius women. They just compliment my negatives, I personally have a problem with caring what people think of me etc and most of the aquarius women will pick me up and somehow make it not matter.

 

it's really Odd how the signs mean so much. I never believed in astrology but after my mother got me into it, I analyzed my friends and i guessed their sign in 14 of my friends and was not far off on the other 4.

 

Honestly, i like chelsea but being such a Virgo! I like just throwing caution to the wind and being spontaneous and you virgo women **** there and go through every possible scenario lol.I'm sure us libras have some traits you find annoying.

 

I would love someone to talk to about the signs, If you're interested you can email me at [email protected] or add me on msn at [email protected]. I'm a astrology newbie, maybe you can teach me some stuff.

 

thanks again