Thanx

[gabbie0586]

I appreciate the advice that yall have given me....its helped me out alot on deciding what to do....I still have no idea what i want to do though....Deavin is a good father to my son and he is a sweet person....but I just don't like him in that way anymore....and I know its not all about me anymore...but I know that he is not the father of my baby boy....for one he looks nothing like Deavin and the second thing ...he was born at the right time...if he was deavins baby he would have been born sometime in late june or early july and he was born July 20..so I'm pretty sure hes jays...its just that you know I wanna be with Jay really bad I love him and everything...I believe that he would be a great father....he had to raise his little brother when he was growing up ..so he knows how to take care of little kids...but hes not financially stable yet.....ummm hes not in school right now...he is going (so he says) and Deavin hes in collge he works...lets just say he's everything Jays not....he's what my mom wants for me...but its not what I want...

I just don't wanna mess up the relationship with my parents again and date Jay and then have something go wrong....then I won't have anybody on my side...and I don't wanna hurt deavin but eventually he is gonna get hurt anyway when we get the test....but actually he kinda put this on himself...he knew from the beginning when we got back together that the baby could be jays and that jay would come back into my life if he knew that the baby might be his...

But i'm gonna tell yall what I was thinking about doing and u can tell me if I'm crazy or not...Well Jay and I are together again...But Deavin does not know that yet...I don't want to tell him because he will tell my mom...and then all hell will break loose...and I will definetly get kicked out then...But i was thinking that I can date Jay on the DL(down low) without my mom knowing atleast until after I get the paternity test then we can go from there....cuz I don't wanna let him go again...I really did hurt him when I lied about the baby not being his and then breaking up with him on the same day...and I don't wanna hurt him again just to make my mom happy...i really don't think its right to keep somebodys baby away from them just because their not what u want them to be....and my mom knew that when I decided to keep the baby...she knew there was a chance that the baby could be jay's and she accepted that...I guess she did that because she thought I would go along with her plan and keep on lyin to jay and deavin but I can't do that anymore....ne ways this whole situation is stressin me out.... thanx for reading....