basil67 Posted January 28, 2019 Posted January 28, 2019 It’s okay for women to put in their preference that they’re looking for a Tall, Caucasian male that’s at least 6 feet and up, haha but God forbid a guy puts a certain preference on their profile and you see all the old, bitter women come out of the woodwork with pitchforks and all. You're seriously comparing a woman who wants a 6ft blonde guy to date to an ex jailbird who wants a young woman with significantly less life experience just for sex? The first example is shallow. The second example is predatory.
basil67 Posted January 28, 2019 Posted January 28, 2019 (edited) But I take exception with the bolded though....Its a gross mischaracterization.. I have a close friend that is in his early sixties...He is married to a woman that is almost 30 years his junior...They have been married for almost 10 years and there is nothing creepy or unusual about it, other than the age gap...They seem like any other couple out there in all respects.. Sure, he is a successful attorney, and she is quite attractive and smart, but you can't say she's with him for his money as she makes enough and signed a pre nup….How does your "sleaze meter" react to this relationship? Yeah, I dunno. It's the whole premise of a guy who's been in and out of jail and who has a really bad track record which really caps it off. A week or two ago the hypothesis was that he'd be prostituting himself to older women - but now the plan is younger women who don't know any better. The whole thing is sleazy. In the scenario of your friends, she's probably got some daddy issues, but be otherwise OK. Plus, it sounds like he wanted a relationship and marriage - not just sex. But a young woman who knows no better than to be with a guy who's got such a questionable background would have a whole lot of other things going on. Seems like all of you get very defensive over this, and sure...its understandable...Its tough enough being an older woman who's worth is often determined by looks, dress size, etc, and who's stock in terms of her physical appearance is going down, to have to have the added competition from younger women who are generally better, fresher, tighter, smaller, etc..I agree that it is probably a tough pill to swallow, hence the immediate action of bottle throwing... It's only about me to the point where I suffered sexual assault from a predator when I was underage. Underage being less than 16. But more so, it's about my daughter and her friends who's worth is often determined by their looks, dress size etc. And their sexuality. As it's only FWB he seeks, then it's certainly about these things now. The knee jerk reaction of just claiming all of these relationships are based out of a creepy older guy trying to swindle some naïve young woman out of her pants, or that the type of woman that would even remotely consider this would have to be "very damaged" is kinda silly....Its just not the case in all scenarios..Some? sure...just like some women go for successful guys because they are gold diggers...Others are just organically attracted.. Though most situations alert my creep factor, it's far more so when the guy ISN'T a successful guy with a respectable history behind him. And this is the descriptor of the guy in the story. We don't know why he was in jail a number of times, what he did to get there and why he didn't learn his lesson the first time. We don't know that he won't yet again re-offend and take this younger woman down with him. I will grant you that a person can make a mistake and go to jail and come out changed. But we're talking repeat offender here. Lastly, I can't think of a crime which doesn't come down to the criminal being self serving to the detriment of others. Whether it be theft, drink driving, murder, speeding tickets....it all demonstrates the perpetrator's innate selfishness. So...yeah. That's why I object to this premise. Edited January 28, 2019 by basil67
Author Lemontea Posted January 28, 2019 Author Posted January 28, 2019 You're seriously comparing a woman who wants a 6ft blonde guy to date to an ex jailbird who wants a young woman with significantly less life experience just for sex? The first example is shallow. The second example is predatory. A ex jailbird can be a 6ft blonde guy too. Ppl can be in jail for non-sex crimes.
basil67 Posted January 28, 2019 Posted January 28, 2019 A ex jailbird can be a 6ft blonde guy too. Ppl can be in jail for non-sex crimes. You don't see many women wanting a 6ft blonde career criminal as a boyfriend though, do you. If you'd read my previous post, you'd see where I gave examples of non sex crimes which put people in jail.
Eternal Sunshine Posted January 28, 2019 Posted January 28, 2019 Sorry TFY, most women in their 20s just wouldn’t be organically attracted to 40yo dudes. We older women were in our 20s once. I was personally never attracted to one nor considered them as any kind of sexual or romantic option. Nor were any of my friends. Any advances from men in that age group creeped us out. However, just like anything there will be exceptions. And OP, even if you look much better than an average man in his 40s, you are competing against ALL men. That includes 20 something hotties that can go all night. 2
2.50 a gallon Posted January 28, 2019 Posted January 28, 2019 (edited) It can be done. I divorced at age 35 and avoided a long time relationship for the next 14 years. In the intervening years I had several bed partners and several of them in their 20's. I did not meet them in clubs, rather I lived in a large apartment complex with over 500 residences. I was socially active, friendly with my neighbors, and weekends I spent most of my time at the pool. We had a couple of volley ball courts, one in sand and a second in the pool. I met several that way. Also we had a large grill out by the pool and on occasion several of us would cook together. I built a good reputation with the grill and so most often would be asked to grill their meat. I also had my own personal Weber in front of my apartment, and it seemed most nights I was grilling outside, again that lead to me meeting the new neighbors when them moved in. I taught myself how to cook many gourmet meals, and again that lead to more dates. Not gourmet, but I also have a recipe for Sloppy Joes, with brown sugar that everybody likes, and the same with my chicken and dumplings. "Let me know when you are going to cook them again" At Christmas time I would bake and decorate cut out cookies, a bottle of wine and then I would cook them breakfast. I also added cutters for Halloween, Thanksgiving and Valentines. I estimate that over that 14 years I got laid a good 2 dozen times baking cookies. I also had several divorced mothers that were FWB's, and a couple of them in their 20's. I met them at work, at the apartment, at the park, and shopping at a grocery store. I had a 5 year FWB relationship with a gal who was 20 years younger. She worked out and had a great body and was multi rich. By that time I had moved out of state, she flew over several times to spend a week or two with me. The last time we were together I was 49, she was planning on us going to the different Disney parks, but I had to decline as I met my current GF and fell in love Edited January 28, 2019 by 2.50 a gallon 1
loversquarrel Posted January 29, 2019 Posted January 29, 2019 Absolutely. I'm living proof, when I was 40 I had a 27 yo fwb that lasted a few years. She was kind of a sugar baby as she paid for all of our dates and get aways. It was great and she was an absolute bombshell. I can understand why though, I'm currently in my late forty's with a full head of dark hair and no grays, I look like I'm in my mid thirties with a firm athletic body and I have an exciting adrenaline packed career.
Interstellar Posted January 29, 2019 Posted January 29, 2019 (edited) You're seriously comparing a woman who wants a 6ft blonde guy to date to an ex jailbird who wants a young woman with significantly less life experience just for sex? The first example is shallow. The second example is predatory. Look, I agree that dating a 20 year old is way, way too young for a 40 year old guy. I’ve also mentioned it before. They’re also immature and fall in and out of love easily. But I do have to point out the hypocrisy that some women have as far as some preference goes. As far as dating younger women, not talking about 18-23 year olds here you have to be extremely fit. You gotta have the six pack. You can’t get away with being relatively or in okay shape. You’re competing with younger guys. Just read that you’re an ex convict, I wish you the best. It’s tough out there. Edited January 29, 2019 by Interstellar
2.50 a gallon Posted January 29, 2019 Posted January 29, 2019 Interseller As for you theory about having to be fit. Not so in my case. I am the skinny 5' 6", 125, endomorph guy. Nothing I could do about developing muscles, I tried for years. But I was a interesting and fun loving guy. Most women that I have met have never flown a kite, so that got me laid several times. I made friends with a 20 something male stripper, who lived in the next apartment. He would go on tour, and need someone to watch his place, so eventually we got a 2 bed room apartment, and became good friends, me being in my 40's. At work they had just hired this 20 year old, who still is the most beautiful woman I have ever met. We ended up car pooling and becoming good friends. She and her friends liked to hit the clubs and party on weekends, but did not like the guys that were constantly hanging around them. So quite often she would ask me to go out with them, as I was a good dancer and they liked to dance. I was also a photographer, and would at time be hired by my stripper friend to shoot him and or his buddies working. And I would ask the gal from work to go along. She was curious to see the inside of an adult store, and asked if I would take her. She looked over the porn tapes and I rented one for us to watch. That was the catalyst to us becoming FWB's. In fact she wanted to move in with me. The sex was great, but there was too great of an age gap between us and I was afraid I might fall for her, and it would have never worked, so I was the one who broke it off. As for the gal who was 20 years younger than me, I met her at the pool of my apartment. She was Mensa smart, a little nerdy, head programmer of a Silicon Valley company and very rich. We're talking more than tens of millions of dollars. She used to ask me to accompany her on all expenses paid trips to the Caribbean, Mexico, Hawaii, the last trip would have been to Tahiti for scuba diving. I never took her up on her offers 1
snowcones Posted January 30, 2019 Posted January 30, 2019 As long as you're not breaking the law, I say go for exactly what you want. I might not always agree with it, but we are in a free market. You need to have confidence though (not arrogance or anger) which it seems like you're lacking. I'd say start there. It's really important and helps with dealing with opposition or rejection. Stay focused and stick to a motto of honesty.
stillafool Posted January 30, 2019 Posted January 30, 2019 A ex jailbird can be a 6ft blonde guy too. Ppl can be in jail for non-sex crimes. OMG, some of these women are cray cray. That Colorado guy, Chris Watts who killed his wife and 2 little girls are getting a ton of love letters from women. 1
Woggle Posted January 30, 2019 Posted January 30, 2019 OMG, some of these women are cray cray. That Colorado guy, Chris Watts who killed his wife and 2 little girls are getting a ton of love letters from women. I read something the other day about that Ted Bundy movie and a ton of women are talking about how hot he is. He had groupies show up during his trial. As for the topic all it takes is one woman to be interested even if 40 are not.
Kitty Tantrum Posted January 31, 2019 Posted January 31, 2019 You need to have confidence though (not arrogance or anger) which it seems like you're lacking. I'd say start there. Yes, this. It's certainly not impossible to find what you're looking for - but you need to be able to meet women - and SEDUCE them - naturally and confidently. You seem to be approaching this with a bargaining mentality. Women will always have the upper hand in that dynamic, unless you're willing to scrape the bottom of the barrel or shell out lots of money.
Jaylicks Posted January 31, 2019 Posted January 31, 2019 Been pursued by many young women but surely it’s not all younger women’s preference.
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