She Feels Rejected: Why?

[allansilver]

In the future, I will always be cheerful towards her and say hello and be kind. If she recoils from that, that is a sign of her character and inability to deal with minor stressors in life.

[preraph]

Yeah, but if a woman does that and a man gets mad, then the man is made fun of for a lack of composure. The woman is never to blame. A woman flakes on a date, guy gets mad, everyone laughs at him or taunts him.

 

Why do you espouse a double standard? Same standard for everyone. I have every right then to laugh at her and taunt for her a lack of composure. Equal rights, equal rules.

 

Who you calling double standard on? I would NEVER do that to anyone, no matter who it was. If you want to see double standard and excuse making, look in the mirror. This was your bad.

[allansilver]

So, here's some additional detail.

 

I had been talking to Girls ABCD. All of them approached me at some point that evening. So did girls EF and G, maybe a few others as well. There were girls H and I also who approached.

 

Anyway, after inviting and disinviting myself on the denny's date with Girl A by talking to Girl B, I actually arrived with girls C and J (C's friend). So, it's likely Girl B saw me walking in with these two girls, but not with girl A.

 

This had to have triggered her upset. This is probably why she grabbed some random guy to dance with, but appeared to be angry with me. I was dancing intimately with J (C was not around), then danced intimately with C while J was not around.

 

Later, J's boyfriend arrived, which was confusing, since J was acting like a single girl dancing closely with me.

 

Meanwhile as I was dancing intimately with Girl C, girl B was watching or standing directly next to me almost the entire time. I left with girls C, J and K. It's likely girl B saw this and this probably means she will be upset with me if/when I see her again.

 

The question for me is, how do I handle the affections of all of these girls. I like all of them but don't want to hurt any of their feelings. It's perfectly natural and appropriate to talk to all of them since I want to test the waters and see who I get along best with.

[Simple Logic]

If you had gome to Denny’s that night, would you have ordered everything on the menu?

[basil67]

Allan, you are not a bee.

[PRW]

In the future, I will always be cheerful towards her and say hello and be kind. If she recoils from that, that is a sign of her character and inability to deal with minor stressors in life.

She will probably be fine with that. Part of her job as an employee of the store is to be friendly to the customers. But as soon as your push beyond that you will be in trouble.

[allansilver]

She will probably be fine with that. Part of her job as an employee of the store is to be friendly to the customers. But as soon as your push beyond that you will be in trouble.

 

Wrong girl. :-)

 

 

 

I lose track of em all too. But in this case, the gal approached me, stammering and nervous. I ignored her since I couldn't understand what she was saying. I never saw her at that store again. Could've been a coincidence. I hope so. That interaction could've been construed as embarrassing. I hope she didn't feel that way. I think things could've gone better if I had seen her again.

Edited January 13, 2019 by a LoveShack.org Moderator

[allansilver]

Treat others how you want to be treated and maybe it won't happen to you all the time.

It may help to remember that everyone is different with different ethics, some better than others. So don't do rude things assuming you are dealing with the lowest common denominator. Because by doing that, you will miss out on the good ones, who won't want anything to do with someone who acts badly. If you assume someone is considerate until they prove otherwise, you won't automatically filter out the good ones and be left with ones who accept that kind of inconsiderate type thing.

 

I didn't say this happened endlessly to me. I said it's written about endlessly on this forum.

 

So yeah, different ethics means women can get away with flaking and ghosting and not be called out for it. Unlike men.

 

I wasn't rude to her. I invited myself and disinvited myself because I wanted to go dancing. My mistake was not inviting her along. But she seemed not to be in that type of mood.

 

As I said before, I am going to be cheerful and positive around her. Her reaction is her own as an adult.

 

My point is, dont' get pissy with me about supposedly being rude when women ghost and flake all the time and you never criticize them for it.

[Kitty Tantrum]

If you've got what it takes to play the field, then buzz away to your heart's content, busy bee.

 

Part of what it takes, by the way, is DISCRETION. If your promiscuous behavior is indiscreet, many women will not want to associate with you - even if they would have gladly gone home with you otherwise.

[MetallicHue]

I think you need to do a little self introspection and reread some of your posts. Think would you be happy if someone talked like that about yourself. Regardless of whatever your dating problems may be that’s a more serious problem.

[preraph]

I didn't say this happened endlessly to me. I said it's written about endlessly on this forum.

 

So yeah, different ethics means women can get away with flaking and ghosting and not be called out for it. Unlike men.

 

I wasn't rude to her. I invited myself and disinvited myself because I wanted to go dancing. My mistake was not inviting her along. But she seemed not to be in that type of mood.

 

As I said before, I am going to be cheerful and positive around her. Her reaction is her own as an adult.

 

My point is, dont' get pissy with me about supposedly being rude when women ghost and flake all the time and you never criticize them for it.

 

You're rude all around. That's the source of your problems. I don't like flakes and irresponsible people. I may have told some people using OLD who've been ghosted (who hasn't?) to just move on, but that's common sense since they don't know the person and that person could be anyone, and I don't care what sex they are.

 

 

You just really don't like to take any responsibility for your own actions do you? And you're kind of used to just being able to do whatever and not get called on it, best I can tell. That girl didn't flake on you. You flaked on that girl. You're the flake.

Edited January 13, 2019 by preraph

[allansilver]

You're rude all around. That's the source of your problems. I don't like flakes and irresponsible people. I may have told some people using OLD who've been ghosted (who hasn't?) to just move on, but that's common sense since they don't know the person and that person could be anyone, and I don't care what sex they are.

 

 

You just really don't like to take any responsibility for your own actions do you? And you're kind of used to just being able to do whatever and not get called on it, best I can tell. That girl didn't flake on you. You flaked on that girl. You're the flake.

 

Nope. I take full responsibility for my actions, including inviting and disinviting myself. I wanted to dance and have fun, rather than wind down. So sue me. She wanted to go to a diner and wind down. That's cool too. I didn't resent her for it and if she resents me for my choice that's certainly her prerogative. But there's nothing "rude" about this. People change their minds.

 

You're insistent on the male being wrong at all times. Your prerogative. But that doesn't make you right. It just makes you rigid stubborn and inflexible. That's why you're not a fun date or a fun mate.

 

It just makes you crabby, weird and predictable.

 

And no I didn't "flake." Flake means planning something and then not showing up without any notice. She got immediate notice. No flaking. Changing my mind yes. Get your definitions straight before using terms which you don't understand.

 

22,000 posts? Come on. What are you doing?

Edited January 13, 2019 by allansilver

[Garcon1986]

I tried this approach in my favorite dance club and one free yoga studio. I was promptly kicked out and told it would be in your best interest to never come back here again. The sharpest rebuke ever, from women, from an honest man who wants to date.

 

So the moral here is you can date as many women as you like. Just don't go from woman to woman especially when they know each other, otherwise they will gossip you out of the dating game and block you quite effectively.

[preraph]

Nope. I take full responsibility for my actions, including inviting and disinviting myself. I wanted to dance and have fun, rather than wind down. So sue me. She wanted to go to a diner and wind down. That's cool too. I didn't resent her for it and if she resents me for my choice that's certainly her prerogative. But there's nothing "rude" about this. People change their minds.

 

You're insistent on the male being wrong at all times. Your prerogative. But that doesn't make you right. It just makes you rigid stubborn and inflexible. That's why you're not a fun date or a fun mate.

 

It just makes you crabby, weird and predictable.

 

And no I didn't "flake." Flake means planning something and then not showing up without any notice. She got immediate notice. No flaking. Changing my mind yes. Get your definitions straight before using terms which you don't understand.

 

22,000 posts? Come on. What are you doing?

 

Well, I think any of my past men would disagree that I'm not a fun date. At least I don't flake on them like you did and then wonder what happened. You're projecting since your posts are constantly blaming women in the most general ways possible. Men aren't wrong all the time, but you are wrong here. You're the flake in this situation, not her. And speaking of crabby...look in the mirror.

 

Let's try to remember that my advice wasn't unsolicited, like your personal criticism of me is. You came on here asking and I told you. Anyone with common sense wouldn't even had had to ask because most people would find it obvious why she's not happy with you now. You said you were doing something with her and then you flaked on her.

Edited January 13, 2019 by preraph

[preraph]

Actually, yes, many of them are. Even when they date others, they still remain attracted to me and are not shy about making that known publicly.

 

Yes, they do. And that is their prerogative.

 

Ariesdude is not very experienced and I can tell you he or she is not successful. Women flirt and play the field and lead men on. This is completely normal. You are imposing a bizarre double standard that no longer exists. Same rules for everyone. Otherwise, you are supporting the patriarchy with separate gender rules.

 

I see. So it's not just me. Any woman who doesn't tell you what you want to hear is double-standard. Nice hyperbole. If you don't want to hear the answer, don't ask the question. So far, everyone has told you it's you.

[planb1973]

Nope. I take full responsibility for my actions, including inviting and disinviting myself. I wanted to dance and have fun, rather than wind down. So sue me.

 

Your original question is "She feels rejected: Why?"

It does not require rocket science to see why!

 

So why do you care? Obviously you seem to think than she should be eagerly waiting for you to choose her. You pulled a di** move and now know the results.

 

And you wonder why she is giving you the cold shoulder...

 

Your keyboard must be in braille if you are that blind.

[Garcon1986]

1. you have no game

 

2. you're ugly (do you even liftbro)

 

3. dumb strategy: yoga studios are notorious for harboring metoo commie woowoo vegans

 

As for me, I just let the women come to me. #donthatetheplayerhatethegame

 

Can't change being of Asian ethnicity. But I do indeed lift That's steadily paying dividends.

 

Got much better game than I did ten years ago.

 

How does it benefit you by critiquing all of us other men and women of LS? Just saying you're not getting a steady girlfriend with your current strategy. Time to change up the strategy. Part of adulting involves accepting advice even when you think it is wrong (or at least trying it for yourself). I've accepted your advice a long time ago. Can you step up to bat and try our approach?

[edgygirl]

Oh also a misogynist. Typical

 

Of course the feminists on here equate talking to a woman with rape so this is a no-win situation in their eyes. Then they wonder why they're alone? Derp.

[allansilver]

Store Stalking

 

Great!?! No, you're fooling yourself.

 

So now it is multiple times a day.

 

Keep fooling yourself.

 

I sense a restraining order in your future.

 

You need to watch this video:

 

Whatever goofball. No woman wants you so you're not even in the game.

[Garcon1986]

Do you know that you are making women feel good being around you? One key of dating is that women need to feel good to open up to you, and not feel like an assembly line of women ready to line up to suit a man's fancy. Women have always wanted to feel special. Do you do that for women?

 

There's yet another crowd who are only in it for a long term relationship. You can't reach those people if you are talking to five girls one by one down the line. That LTR woman is likely to think "yuck". Your "girl A" picked up subtle body language cues from you she didn't like. Now that she isn't comfortable around you, got to rinse, repeat, and find more new people to date.

[Garcon1986]

Oh I've actually had piles and piles of dates over the last few years, just not six women at once the way you like it. So I'm qualified to give you advice. It's your adult decision to continue criticizing everybody here, however, you don't have what you want yet right? Consider using other people's life experiences to get what you want.

[allansilver]

Oh I've actually had piles and piles of dates over the last few years, just not six women at once the way you like it. So I'm qualified to give you advice. It's your adult decision to continue criticizing everybody here, however, you don't have what you want yet right? Consider using other people's life experiences to get what you want.

 

Again, I have what I want. I'm dating the girl I want to. You don't know how to read. Use your eyes. They are located just below your eyebrows. You know what eyebrows are right? But seriously I just don't want females hating me when I reject them. It's not like I laugh in their faces or call them names. I just choose.

 

Women choose all the time and guys get shamed for feeling butthurt. But here is this female who is enraged. She has a man, or so I assume. Why is she so hurt? If a man can handle rejection so can women. right? They are our equals right?

 

And no, you're not qualified giving advice because you can't ever understand the level of interest that you won't ever experience.

 

I had a physical therapist (hot young single girl) become enraged because she didn't have a chance to see me during a weekly appt. Yeah, I skipped one week because I was out of town. She wasn't even my physical therapist. She just took over the duties from a male therapist who was assigned to me in the middle of my session. That's female privilege lol.

 

So basically I answered my own question. Women are immature, emotional, fragile creatures who need to be pampered or they'll lose it. Look at the responses here. Even guys like you are PMSing. It's hilarious!

Edited January 13, 2019 by allansilver

[Garcon1986]

Is your objective to have no woman be angry at you? Do you want to go around coercing every woman who gets enraged at you for not liking them?

 

That's a lot of people's moods to keep tabs on. I just take the approach of if someone is going to be upset at my actions of rejecting them, then so be it. Can't make everyone happy. Leave em be.

[Garcon1986]

Way too much work to have every woman you encounter agree with your perspective and have a temper that is acceptable to you.

[Kitty Tantrum]

Man, if you have to come in here asking "why did my rejection make this girl feel rejected" - you don't have much room to criticize the insight and advice you receive, or to be offended by it.

 

Or did you just come here to humblebrag about how frustrating it is to have ALL the girls trying to get with you?

 

If you want to be a player, be a player. Own it, and accept the fallout when it happens. You don't get to choose how your behavior makes other people feel. If you don't want situations like this to happen again (and again and again and again), you'd be wise to listen to what everyone is telling you about your apparent lack of social calibration.

 

Insulting the people you came to ask for advice isn't going to help you... unless putting other people down is your go-to self-esteem booster and you don't actually care about other people's feelings or perceptions of you, or that behavior like this will significantly reduce your odds of success - because you actually thrive on the drama of subtly playing groups of women against each other?