ZA Dater Posted January 11, 2019 Posted January 11, 2019 Ok so I went from a really bad date to possibly the best one I have ever had. She is from Sweden and here on holiday, we had been chatting on and off and her schedule never quite linked up with mine but we met up today for lunch and ended up spending her last day in SA with her. Just amazing really, everything that was wrong with the prior date was right with this one. Her smile, her laugh, her open body language, passionate hug and kiss on the cheek at the end. The conversation was really great, she laughed, I smiled and it was just a great time, we went shopping after lunch and it just seemed to work really well. "You are so nice such a gentleman, if you ever come to Sweden let me know", her smile was really special. We could talk about anything, even what we were looking for in terms of dates and she was absolutely gorgeous. So me being me I have landed up really, really liking someone who lives thousands of miles away... 2
AriesDude Posted January 11, 2019 Posted January 11, 2019 Lol happy for you man. Sweden isnt too far. 15k for a return ticket at most. With patience you can make it work. Just stay in contact with skype and stuff if you can
Author ZA Dater Posted January 11, 2019 Author Posted January 11, 2019 Lol happy for you man. Sweden isnt too far. 15k for a return ticket at most. With patience you can make it work. Just stay in contact with skype and stuff if you can I am hoping to keep in contact with her. What struck me was how different she was to the ladies I normally go on dates with, more relaxed "I like a gentleman, someone who I can talk to, intelligence is key". Her body language was just very positive, leant in to talk to me, played with her (blond) hair a lot, smiled, laughed, in fact she smiled almost all the time. I kept the conversation light but interesting, she asked about me which local ladies never ever do. She is motivated in life and those stunning blue eyes. I suppose in a way this is what I do, I always seem to end up liking the most impossible impractical sort of scenarios. Its been years since I had this same sort of vibe and enjoyed a date so much.
Author ZA Dater Posted January 11, 2019 Author Posted January 11, 2019 when you two gettin' married? Your sarcasm is duly noted. It was a positive experience and when it comes to dating its been years since I have had one and in some respects this might have been the best experience I have ever had.
edgygirl Posted January 11, 2019 Posted January 11, 2019 Maybe you can import her Maybe keep in touch and eventually visit her too? I also usually prefer international people. It's exciting and interesting. Maybe you'll find out it works better for you personality-wise than the women in your own country.
Author ZA Dater Posted January 11, 2019 Author Posted January 11, 2019 Maybe you can import her Maybe keep in touch and eventually visit her too? I also usually prefer international people. It's exciting and interesting. Maybe you'll find out it works better for you personality-wise than the women in your own country. Am hoping to keep in contact. One of the things which struck me about her is she seemed so sincere, which isn't something I encounter very often. I had a really good feeling about this, her body language was also a lot better than I have encountered before and it was her who suggested we keep in contact. The rather amusing thing is she doesn't think she is good looking "every girl in Sweden is good looking" was her response. If laughing and smiling matter then I did really well here but my feeling was good and that's what matters most. Based on that feeling if I can keep in contact I'd seriously consider going over there...
edgygirl Posted January 11, 2019 Posted January 11, 2019 I'm really happy for you you had a good date! Make sure there's romantic interest... as in don't get hopes high yet and plan on visiting if it's not clear her interest is romantic. What a shame she's already leaving and you can't get another date to try and kiss her or so... Can you get one last meeting before she goes to the airport? I was once in a couple of dates with a guy who offered to take me to the airport (I had to go be with family for someone's surgery) and then a few months later when I came back we rekindled and continued dating. And she's right, a lot of Swedish women have the kind of beauty that is what a lot of people in the West consider as traditional beauty... so she prob doesn't see herself as mega hot.
Author ZA Dater Posted January 11, 2019 Author Posted January 11, 2019 I'm really happy for you you had a good date! Make sure there's romantic interest... as in don't get hopes high yet and plan on visiting if it's not clear her interest is romantic. What a shame she's already leaving and you can't get another date to try and kiss her or so... Can you get one last meeting before she goes to the airport? I was once in a couple of dates with a guy who offered to take me to the airport (I had to go be with family for someone's surgery) and then a few months later when I came back we rekindled and continued dating. And she's right, a lot of Swedish women have the kind of beauty that is what a lot of people in the West consider as traditional beauty... so she prob doesn't see herself as mega hot. She literally chose to spend her entire last day with me....there were two kisses, she kissed me and I kissed her, hugged her and I think she was genuinely sorry she couldn't spend more time with me. My overriding memory of her is the amount of time she spent smiling and how easy she was to talk to and he actually asked about me. Irrespective it was a great date and the feeling from my side was good, I need to back 5 years to the last time I experienced that feeling. 2
edgygirl Posted January 11, 2019 Posted January 11, 2019 (edited) Wow I got goose bumps here for you! (specially as I know you've been struggling) Awesome!!! Sounds very promising. Don't get discouraged by the distance. Keep in touch and hopefully things can keep moving in the right direction. Go visit eventually if she's open to that. I never been to Scandinavia, must be beautiful. Very happy you had a good time and met someone promising. Wait - only a kiss on the cheek? Again, make sure there's romantic interest! Edited January 11, 2019 by edgygirl
Lotsgoingon Posted January 11, 2019 Posted January 11, 2019 "You are so nice such a gentleman, if you ever come to Sweden let me know", So which website did you use to book your tickets?
Garcon1986 Posted January 11, 2019 Posted January 11, 2019 I stand up and give a round of applause from the Garcon to South Africa.
Author ZA Dater Posted January 11, 2019 Author Posted January 11, 2019 I stand up and give a round of applause from the Garcon to South Africa. Lets see, she might not be interested like that but irrespective it was a good experience which considering I have so many bad ones is very refreshing and nice. What was promising was I managed to get better body language this time than I have in ages and I had that wowed feeling again, again very rare. Another thing is there is common interest "a lot of the problem I have with men is there is no common interest, for me intelligence is very important". She did mention she wants to come back to SA... Even if nothing comes of this I have a good experience to remember and was wowed, which maybe this forum doesn't really understand but being wowed is for me an amazing experience.
chillii Posted January 11, 2019 Posted January 11, 2019 There ya go za , another well done good for you mate. And don't worry about Sweden you sound like you have the money to handle that until you figure something else out , just supposing l mean, not sayin this or that. But if you did wanna see her again. Just one little, tiny, thing, and don't get discouraged you did really well but l'm just wondering, did you happen to try a proper kiss, even just a small one. Not forced or anything just a gentle feel your way thing at a close time , that way if she happened to turn away a little it's sorta not too awkward. Would've been nice just to have that is all cross that line before she left, that's all. lf not not a biggie if your gonna keep in touch you can still move things in that direction if you'd like to in messages and stuff. Anyrate nice goin , great to see some feel good .
Gretchen12 Posted January 11, 2019 Posted January 11, 2019 I told you, location matters a lot in dating. When people have trouble finding someone, they always assume it'd be the same no matter where they live. Not so. 1
chillii Posted January 11, 2019 Posted January 11, 2019 yeah , we've all been at him to widen the scope a bit. Still , it was really nice to hear anyway right.
elaine567 Posted January 11, 2019 Posted January 11, 2019 If I remember rightly you are blond and blue eyed too.
guest569 Posted January 12, 2019 Posted January 12, 2019 Even if nothing comes of this I have a good experience to remember and was wowed, which maybe this forum doesn't really understand but being wowed is for me an amazing experience. I totally understand the importance of having a positive experience when you’ve had too many negative ones. It’s hard to be hopeful and optimistic otherwise. But now you’ve proven to yourself that it is possible. I told you not to beat yourself up over the previous date, it seems that you felt something wasn’t right also, and you weren’t sold on her, yet you were mainly hurt by the rejection. 1
rightondude Posted January 12, 2019 Posted January 12, 2019 brother you can take this and build off it. Let it give you confidence that you can gain the interest of a smoking hot swede. And if you have the means, get your butt up there ASAP. If not, keep in touch. Don't smother but don't let yourself be forgotten. good luck. 1
Author ZA Dater Posted January 12, 2019 Author Posted January 12, 2019 If I remember rightly you are blond and blue eyed too. Correct. I have sent her my number, we were chatting on Tinder. Let's see what happens on the next few days. Just a very different experience to what I am used to and her level of communication was also really good. She could have brushed me off afttt lunch instead she suggested I go with her to a shop she wanted to go to.
Author ZA Dater Posted January 13, 2019 Author Posted January 13, 2019 Unmatched. So guess she isn't that interested, can't say I am that surprised. Huge pity because it's very rare I find anyone I like. Which I suppose brings me to the fact that most women just tell men what they think they want to hear "let's keep in contact". " If you come to Sweden you must let me know".Who knows maybe she was just looking for fun when she was here.
alphamale Posted January 13, 2019 Posted January 13, 2019 Huge pity because it's very rare I find anyone I like. maybe you need to lower your standards a bit
theMirror Posted January 13, 2019 Posted January 13, 2019 Unmatched. So guess she isn't that interested, can't say I am that surprised. Huge pity because it's very rare I find anyone I like. Which I suppose brings me to the fact that most women just tell men what they think they want to hear "let's keep in contact". " If you come to Sweden you must let me know".Who knows maybe she was just looking for fun when she was here. It's in fact the mindset of travelers. I travel a lot, many times alone, and when I visit a new country, it'd be nice to have someone to share times with. Would I date certain guys I hung out with? Mainly not. When traveling, we often are not our real selves. We're the fun, loving, witty persons that seem to be carefree. But it's not real life, it's not real "us". When we're back to our places, back to work, school, etc, that's exactly how we are. I've also talked to several female travelers. As romantic as it might sound. You always dream about meeting your soul mate at an exotic place, like in those movies, most of the time, it doesn't work out, due to various reasons.
Recommended Posts