lookit Posted September 16, 2005 Posted September 16, 2005 Any advice about staying in a loveless marriage? My husband doesn't work, lies to me all the time, and treats me like dirt. Should I stay with him for our 1year old daughter? He doesn't hit me or anything. I just crave a REAL relationship.
LittleMiss Posted September 16, 2005 Posted September 16, 2005 Have you tried any kind of counseling? You two got married for a reason. If not love, then what?
Author lookit Posted September 16, 2005 Author Posted September 16, 2005 He has been in counseling for a year for an on again off again addiction to pain pills. I have been waiting with open arms for years for him to just love me and be normal.
LittleMiss Posted September 16, 2005 Posted September 16, 2005 Maybe you two should be in Marriage counseling together. It seems like there are more problems than his addiction to pain pills.
Author lookit Posted September 16, 2005 Author Posted September 16, 2005 Yeah he is emotionally like a 15 year old, sees things as black or white, and thinks only about himself. Not one lick of improvement from 1 year of his own counseling, and I can tell you for sure he wouldn't do couples counseling because "he doesn't have a problem". Thanks for the advice though.
LittleMiss Posted September 16, 2005 Posted September 16, 2005 Well, I'm sorry but if he isn't willing to seek help or even see that clearly there is a problem in the marriage then you need to get out. I would not be able to put myself and my child through the pain of not feeling loved.
Author lookit Posted September 16, 2005 Author Posted September 16, 2005 Here is the problem...he is great with our daughter. I just wonder if I will be able to hide the pain of not having a loving relationship if I stay with him.
Mz. Pixie Posted September 16, 2005 Posted September 16, 2005 Get out now. You still have a chance to find someone who truly loves you. I did, but I waited much too long to do so.
Author lookit Posted September 16, 2005 Author Posted September 16, 2005 I did, but I waited much too long to do so. That is what I am afraid of!
LittleMiss Posted September 16, 2005 Posted September 16, 2005 Here is the problem...he is great with our daughter. I just wonder if I will be able to hide the pain of not having a loving relationship if I stay with him. Don't settle just because he is good with your daughter. He can still be a good father if you two get a divorce. My bf is still a wonderful father to his kids and he and his wife have split. Just leave and try to find happiness in your life.
Author lookit Posted September 16, 2005 Author Posted September 16, 2005 I know that would be the right thing to do, but I am afraid of ruining my daughter's life. Children of divorced parents often end up having emotional problems, and I don't want her to hate me when she is older just because I wanted to be happy. I know that sounds dysfunctional and sick, but that is where I am right now. Thank you for your help:)
LittleMiss Posted September 16, 2005 Posted September 16, 2005 Children that are brought up in a home with a father and mother that don't love each other and fight end up with emotional issues as well.
Author lookit Posted September 16, 2005 Author Posted September 16, 2005 Yeah I know, we try not to fight in front of her. We never yell at eachother, it's just the little looks and sarcastic remarks. She's too young to see it yet, and I guess if things don't get better I'll leave him hopefully before she's old enough to realize.
LittleMiss Posted September 16, 2005 Posted September 16, 2005 Be strong! I know it's really hard to do, but it's really the best choice for all of you.
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