Pandora2018 Posted January 8, 2019 Posted January 8, 2019 Today is Tuesday. So guy and I met through social media and after a coupe of weeks of messaging, we met very spontaneously one evening after work. That first date (2 hrs/drinks) was this past Thursday. We kissed, date went well. He texted to say he had a great time, seemed very genuine. By Saturday morning, he asked me out for dinner that weekend, which I accepted.... leading to Sunday dinner date/2-3 hrs/Date#2. He had to leave early to finish work from home. He texted to make sure I got home safely from the venue etc. and we chatted thru yesterday (Monday) and he was sharing random pictures of his day etc. All seeming very genuine, although by this point, despite his flattering words and genuine look on the date, I have not yet heard from him today/nor asking for a third date. I will not text him until he does. And while over the course of today, I've kind of benched him because I think maybe he is not really interested, I just wanted to confirm with you strangers and your 2 cents on this! Thanks!
manfrombelow2 Posted January 8, 2019 Posted January 8, 2019 It has only been around 24 hours since your last interaction with him for Christ's sake. Give him a chance to breathe. Moreover, I don't see any reason why you don't allow yourself to initiate the contact with him if you want to? After all, he's been, according to your words, nothing but geuine and sincere, so don't you think at least he deserved to receive something (a text maybe) from your end too? Finally, he does not own you a third date. If you like him and want to continue seeing him, send him some text asking him about his day or how he's been, I'm sure he'd take the chance to ask you for a third date. Personally, my principle is that if the first two dates went well, I'd stop initiating contact and let it be the woman's job because that's how things are supposed to be. Today is Tuesday. So guy and I met through social media and after a coupe of weeks of messaging, we met very spontaneously one evening after work. That first date (2 hrs/drinks) was this past Thursday. We kissed, date went well. He texted to say he had a great time, seemed very genuine. By Saturday morning, he asked me out for dinner that weekend, which I accepted.... leading to Sunday dinner date/2-3 hrs/Date#2. He had to leave early to finish work from home. He texted to make sure I got home safely from the venue etc. and we chatted thru yesterday (Monday) and he was sharing random pictures of his day etc. All seeming very genuine, although by this point, despite his flattering words and genuine look on the date, I have not yet heard from him today/nor asking for a third date. I will not text him until he does. And while over the course of today, I've kind of benched him because I think maybe he is not really interested, I just wanted to confirm with you strangers and your 2 cents on this! Thanks! 1
PRW Posted January 9, 2019 Posted January 9, 2019 Sounds like he did everything almost perfect. You are not BF/GF yet. No one owes anyone anything. You are both still free to see other people at the same time. The only Thing I see he did wrong was take several weeks to make the 1st date. That should have happened after just a few messages, but in his defense he may not have known for sure he actually wanted a date that quick. Men are humans, not robots. I would have recommended he not send those pics as well because he would have built up strong expectations within you too soon, but no one is perfect. Overall, he did a pretty good job. As an FYI, when I date, for the first 3-4 dates I would contact you only once a week (to make the date). I would not initiate "other" contact between the dates, but I would certainly chat with you, be friendly, and enjoy the contact from you if you reached out to me. The reason I would handle it this way is to weed out women who were insecure and clingy, and had unrealistic expectations while we were still in the casual "introductory" phase of dating before we were actually BF/GF
edgygirl Posted January 9, 2019 Posted January 9, 2019 (edited) Jeez... Date #2 was 2 days ago, you chatted yesterday and today is... Tuesday. What exactly is the issue here? If anything, seems to be YOU. Chill, girl!!! Go find something to occupy your time and mind so you don't obsess with a man you hardly know. Meet girlfriends, watch a movie, go walk in the park. Your own anxiety is a you problem, not something he did or didn't do. In fact he didn't do anything wrong so far. Why are you even anxious? Also, learn to lower your expectations in early stages. I also struggle with that, but what's the alternative? Edited January 9, 2019 by edgygirl 3
Highndry Posted January 9, 2019 Posted January 9, 2019 LOL. Seriously? Playing you? The guy took you on a couple dates and you haven't even had sex yet. Exactly what's he "playing you" about? 2
AriesDude Posted January 9, 2019 Posted January 9, 2019 yeah not seeing that this guy is really doing anything wrong apart from being a little quiet which would just mean he is busy. If you dont wanna get anxious everytime he goes quiet in the future then start sending him some messages and discuss when he is mostly free? Remember there is not and never will be some unwritten book as to how these things work between every single couple out there. Everyone is different and asking someone about something that worries you is completely normal.
smackie9 Posted January 9, 2019 Posted January 9, 2019 Little miss muffet shouldn't be sitting on her tuffet waiting for a text to come through. He's waiting for you to initiate contact...he shouldn't have to be doing all the work. It's a modern age.....ask or suggest another date, setting up a place and time.
Recommended Posts