mortensorchid Posted January 6, 2019 Posted January 6, 2019 I put up a profile on Match last week, I am starting off 2019 in a better frame of mind. Results? Well, I have not been on Match for a few years now and I am kind of shocked at the changes and results. One person is obviously looking for a hook up and made enough sexual comments for me to say NEXT on him. (To be clear, I am not looking for a hook up, I am looking for a relationship.) Another was a guy who lived in another state and he said he comes to my area often enough on business / personal reasons so he would like to meet me. I also said NEXT on that one because he's obviously also looking for a hook up and nothing that serious. Another guy sent me a wink through it, and he and I met a few weeks ago already through Bumble. For the sake of redundancy there was no spark at all - when I walked in he said he already ate and if I wanted to get something he would pay for it. I ordered water. I called it after 45 minutes, we get to the car in the parking lot where we had parked next to each other, no handshake / hug good-bye, never heard a word again from him. From now on, if I encounter someone like that again who says he ate already or doesn't order any food / beverage with me, I will just walk out. I'm a little ... Confused I guess. It would be foolish if not downright nieve to think that you would not encounter bad vibes with people or that this next person you are going to meet is THE ONE, but why this? In past experiences I had always had the most positive experiences with Match in that it's the one you're always going to meet the most volume of people through and now ... Not so much. Am I wrong?
chillii Posted January 6, 2019 Posted January 6, 2019 l dunno if your wrong , hasn't been very long and you haven't even found anyone worth meeting yet anyway. That wouldn't be unusual in such a short time. Could take 6mths to come across one even worth meeting. The one interstate or where ever , what made you think for sure he was only after a hook up? lf you liked him could've been worth talking on the phone, getting to know him a little. My gf lived 12hours away and l wasn't after a hook up. She lives with me now but l went to see her a few times we clicked in about 1 second and it just got better from there. So later on she moved down. The one that ate already , eh what a great idea if l was ever dating again. See a lotta the guys complaining about costs haha, what a classic just don't eat , no cost. Sorry that was just a chuckle l was having to myself reading it. Chin up though and good luck.
Malin889 Posted January 6, 2019 Posted January 6, 2019 It's only January 6, so give it a few more days, lol! I agree about the guy from out of state. If he's in your area alot, maybe he is looking for something serious... Try to give him a chance if you didn't already block him. I've been on and off OLD for awhile, and I always give people a chance who might live far away. I live in a small state, so an hour away from me is the next state over. I only reject people if they act inappropriate in some way. I think you should give this guy a shot. And maybe go on OkCupid, Zoosk? I've always gotten a lot of people email me on both those sites.
smackie9 Posted January 6, 2019 Posted January 6, 2019 The sites, and the method of OLD has evolved, just like anything else. Opportunists have now tainted what was at one time a great way to meet people. No different than ebay. Used to be a great place to shop, now it's all overseas merchants selling crap. Have to find a new way to meet people.
nospam99 Posted January 6, 2019 Posted January 6, 2019 In spite of no 'long-term success' i.e. finding an LTR, I'm a fan of match.com because of the number of women, the amount of information about each that may (or may not) be in their profiles, and the variety of search tools. I gotta ask about the things that I look for: - are you contacting men or only responding if they contact you? - have you posted both at least one face photo and at least one full body photo? - in your full body photo(s), do you appear to have a waist? - how 'strict' or 'flexible' are the parameters you've posted for what you're looking for in a man to date: age, location, height, body type, salary, marital status, religion, education, ethnicity? - how long is your essay? does it give a good idea of both what you bring to the table and what you're looking for? - how many of the selectable interests and sports have you picked? I'm comfortable taking the 'male role' of making first contact. But I'll let the ladies suggest whether they think it's a good idea to make first contact and under what circumstances e.g. the guy pushes all your buttons. For 'picking', I review my Daily and Other Matches every day though, by now, almost all of them are women I've already noticed. I also use the Discover/Search tool with several filters set and sort by either Match Picks (tends to filter out women who haven't logged on for a while) or Mutual Match. My search distance is 30 miles which works out to be a 50 minutes one-way drive with the way match.com calculates distance. I don't send 'Likes' - if I am interested in meeting a woman I send a message written in the style (not necessarily the length) of my LS posts. I pay for read notifications. I may send a second message if the first was sent months ago and never read. I rarely send a second message if the first was read and not responded to.
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