Insoc Posted January 2, 2019 Share Posted January 2, 2019 So i'm seeing this woman, took her 3 days + to respond to my text, she didn't answer my question either in the text, just said "Hope you had a Great New Year", so should i wait 3 days + to respond or ? I'm kinda sick of texting, it's like the most impersonal form of communication ever and I think that ghosting is a mutual experience that all should feel in return lol. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Cersei Posted January 2, 2019 Share Posted January 2, 2019 Lol, oh ghosting is so fun. Yes all should enjoy it. Let her sweat a couple days. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Insoc Posted January 2, 2019 Author Share Posted January 2, 2019 Lol, oh ghosting is so fun. Yes all should enjoy it. Let her sweat a couple days. I think I will, thing is I mentioned meeting her for a 2nd date this weekend, she initially said it sounds good, I just wanted to confirm the date and time I proposed and she didn't even respond to my question. I will Ghost, I never had the luxury to do it back because I'm way too humble so now it's my chance. lol 1 Link to post Share on other sites
L0nely Posted January 2, 2019 Share Posted January 2, 2019 if a person is truly into you but they just super bz, at most they will respond at the end of the day. anything else is just stupid games they play. there's a saying, "you play stupid games, you get stupid prizes." give her her stupid prize. lol Link to post Share on other sites
Happy Lemming Posted January 2, 2019 Share Posted January 2, 2019 I treat all communications the same way. When I worked, I would always respond to an e-mail, phone call or text within 24 hours, even if I didn't have an answer or completed the project. I treat dating the same way, if I haven't responded in 24 hours, I'm dead or in a coma. 3 days is entirely too long to expect a return text. If she is not courteous now, (in the beginning of dating) she never will be. NEXT!! Link to post Share on other sites
DKT3 Posted January 2, 2019 Share Posted January 2, 2019 I treat all communications the same way. When I worked, I would always respond to an e-mail, phone call or text within 24 hours, even if I didn't have an answer or completed the project. I treat dating the same way, if I haven't responded in 24 hours, I'm dead or in a coma. 3 days is entirely too long to expect a return text. If she is not courteous now, (in the beginning of dating) she never will be. NEXT!! This.....relationships would work so much better if people didn't plow through red flags. I would wait 3 days to text her back...3 days + forever 1 Link to post Share on other sites
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted January 2, 2019 Share Posted January 2, 2019 3 days = she's not that into you. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Insoc Posted January 2, 2019 Author Share Posted January 2, 2019 if a person is truly into you but they just super bz, at most they will respond at the end of the day. anything else is just stupid games they play. there's a saying, "you play stupid games, you get stupid prizes." give her her stupid prize. lol Sounds like a plan lol, to be honest it was 3 days 6 hours lol and to make matters worse she never responded to my question. I saw she was posting FB updates on New Years, so I sorta take it as I'm low priority, if FB pics are more important than a 5 - 10 second text response? Okay, I get it. Next Link to post Share on other sites
Author Insoc Posted January 2, 2019 Author Share Posted January 2, 2019 I treat all communications the same way. When I worked, I would always respond to an e-mail, phone call or text within 24 hours, even if I didn't have an answer or completed the project. I treat dating the same way, if I haven't responded in 24 hours, I'm dead or in a coma. 3 days is entirely too long to expect a return text. If she is not courteous now, (in the beginning of dating) she never will be. NEXT!! I noticed that after the first date, I thought maybe it was her older age, she is pushing 58, not of a Millennial (no offense) but has an iPhone and was texting her kids during our first date, so finding time, is a bit of a stretch. I'm new to this texting game, so I'm learning the ropes. I think even over New Years, it's too long 3+ days, people like to make excuses and I'm sorta like hearing that little boy cry wolf analogy. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Insoc Posted January 2, 2019 Author Share Posted January 2, 2019 3 days = she's not that into you. Obviously not or just really bad at communication, it's better to see this early in the game then to find out down the road. I thought maybe it was her older age/generation, or the holiday or that her kids are in town, but honestly, who cannot respond to a text in 5 to 10 seconds? A simple one liner? Link to post Share on other sites
BC1980 Posted January 2, 2019 Share Posted January 2, 2019 3 days is excessive. I wouldn't respond at and move on. Link to post Share on other sites
alphamale Posted January 2, 2019 Share Posted January 2, 2019 3 days = she's not that into you. yep, that says it all Link to post Share on other sites
emeraldgreen Posted January 2, 2019 Share Posted January 2, 2019 3 days doesn't even qualify as an afterthought. She doesn't give a **** at all. Link to post Share on other sites
Happy Lemming Posted January 2, 2019 Share Posted January 2, 2019 I noticed that after the first date, I thought maybe it was her older age, she is pushing 58... My girlfriend and I are also in that AARP demographic and we respond to each other in a timely manner. We always have. I'm not very good at texting, so if it is too long I'll e-mail or call her. No excuse for not responding in a timely manner. At 58, she should know what common courtesy is. A short "Thank you for a nice time the other night, but I don't wish to accept another date" would have been in order. 3 days is unacceptable in my opinion. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Insoc Posted January 2, 2019 Author Share Posted January 2, 2019 My girlfriend and I are also in that AARP demographic and we respond to each other in a timely manner. We always have. I'm not very good at texting, so if it is too long I'll e-mail or call her. No excuse for not responding in a timely manner. At 58, she should know what common courtesy is. A short "Thank you for a nice time the other night, but I don't wish to accept another date" would have been in order. 3 days is unacceptable in my opinion. She texted me right after I left her house on the first date wasn't even a week ago yet, telling me to let me know when I got home, then we bounced text back and forth for a day or two she responded promptly, then I proposed another date this weekend, she said great and I mentioned which day and time and said to confirm, she never did. Figuring tomorrow is Wed, I figured confirmation wasn't too much to ask. Then 3.5 days later I got a response saying "Happy New Year", no mention of my last text or this weekend. She already wished me Happy New Year prior, not sure if her last text was a question or just a statement lol! I knew she had family in town, kids home from college and one kid is having issues with substance abuse, maybe lot's of friends and party so I was cutting her some slack, but then I saw she is posting updates on FB I was like, okay I can see I'm not priority here, so time to move along. Link to post Share on other sites
Happy Lemming Posted January 2, 2019 Share Posted January 2, 2019 ...so I was cutting her some slack, but then I saw she is posting updates on FB I was like, okay I can see I'm not priority here, so time to move along. We all can multi-task... while I've posting on Loveshack, I've been emailing my girlfriend. You are correct, you are not a priority. Link to post Share on other sites
Gretchen12 Posted January 2, 2019 Share Posted January 2, 2019 Sounds like she ghosted you, then something made her send a happy new year text. She didn't answer your question because she doesn't want the second date. If you ghost her now, everybody is happy, no one feels guilty, no one feels let down. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
chillii Posted January 2, 2019 Share Posted January 2, 2019 Well it's a big time for her, busy, you'd still imagine she would've read your last message though buttt. Just to be on the safe side you can still cut her some more slack just leaving her be for 3 or 4 days and if you hear from her you hear from her. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Insoc Posted January 2, 2019 Author Share Posted January 2, 2019 We all can multi-task... while I've posting on Loveshack, I've been emailing my girlfriend. You are correct, you are not a priority. I know, I do it all day at work, I don't buy "ghosting" as a logical reason unless you lost your phone or are dead, not in this day and age. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Insoc Posted January 2, 2019 Author Share Posted January 2, 2019 Sounds like she ghosted you, then something made her send a happy new year text. She didn't answer your question because she doesn't want the second date. If you ghost her now, everybody is happy, no one feels guilty, no one feels let down. I'll never know, I'm not going to continue it and move on, I had an argument with my one room mate telling him the story saying, "well maybe she is busy", I'm like dude, who can't reply to a text in 5 to 10 seconds? Really? lol, he goes "you will regret it like you have with the other women you got impatient with and pissed off", I'm like well you can look at it how you want, but in this day and age, phones are in people's hands or near them at all times, all hours of the day. Then he goes, " you are not a priority yet cause you don't know her good, it's not even a week since you had the 1st date"... I give up, I think you know when someone is interested, I had a couple like that, showed interest and were courteous and prompt, heck even my ex when we met would never leave an e-mail or voice mail message go unanswered for more than 24 hours, if that. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Insoc Posted January 2, 2019 Author Share Posted January 2, 2019 Well it's a big time for her, busy, you'd still imagine she would've read your last message though buttt. Just to be on the safe side you can still cut her some more slack just leaving her be for 3 or 4 days and if you hear from her you hear from her. I think the assumptions on not being interested are the truth, when I kissed her on the lips, she was probably the least receptive of my last 3 dates she didn't seem to enjoy it, so red flag #1. Then she didn't say much about the 6 hours we spent together, I did but she didn't, you know "Had a great time with you", #2 and then delay in text response and didn't respond to my question. It's time to cut my losses and move on, ghost her and be done with it. Link to post Share on other sites
Marc878 Posted January 2, 2019 Share Posted January 2, 2019 She was to busy? It takes about what 5 seconds to send a text. Why waste time. No response and move on Link to post Share on other sites
Author Insoc Posted January 2, 2019 Author Share Posted January 2, 2019 She was to busy? It takes about what 5 seconds to send a text. Why waste time. No response and move on I know, but people come up with the best excuses in the world don't they? I heard several over the past month, seem Match is a haven for Ghosters Anonymous lol. Link to post Share on other sites
Rocker71 Posted January 2, 2019 Share Posted January 2, 2019 3 days = she's not that into you. I'd say she's not into you at all. One woman took 4 days to answer my text one time. And it was a kind of a passive/nice rejection text when she did get around to it. I haven't communicated with her since. If a woman is into you, you'd know it. There will be no doubt in your mind. She'll just show it. You should leave her alone and talk to more women. She'll show you if she's worth more of your time or not. Link to post Share on other sites
chillii Posted January 2, 2019 Share Posted January 2, 2019 I think the assumptions on not being interested are the truth, when I kissed her on the lips, she was probably the least receptive of my last 3 dates she didn't seem to enjoy it, so red flag #1. Then she didn't say much about the 6 hours we spent together, I did but she didn't, you know "Had a great time with you", #2 and then delay in text response and didn't respond to my question. It's time to cut my losses and move on, ghost her and be done with it. Yeah right, well that's different , no enthusiasm at all from her sorry. Link to post Share on other sites
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