Author Bettyboo456 Posted January 4, 2019 Author Posted January 4, 2019 I haven’t read all of the responses, so I don’t know if this has been mentioned.... I suggest meeting her. Tell him that you would like for her and maybe even her bf to meet y’all for coffee or perhaps even go on a double date (something like bowling). You will be able to tell whether they are just friends or not by their interactions with each other. If he refuses to introduce the two of you, then I would be concerned that they are more than friends. It has been mentioned and my reply to it was, they don’t hang out together, they just seem to text very once in awhile. So I would feel weird asking to meet her when they don’t even hang out. Apparently she knows about me.
2much4 Posted January 4, 2019 Posted January 4, 2019 I don't get why everyones advice is so chill. I would be furious. They don't work together anymore, there's no reason he should keep in touch with a fling he had while you were on a break. 1
KBarletta Posted January 4, 2019 Posted January 4, 2019 I am a male, 45 y.o., divorced, currently in a relationship that is going on 10 months long. We are in love. I also have a number of very close female friends, one of whom is a very close friend that I had a brief fling with in the past, long before I met my current GF. Both women are aware of each other though they haven't met simply because they live in different cities. We were friends before the fling and are still friends. This female friend and I text each other about our lives, seek out the other's advice on career, family, relationship issues, etc., and support each other through difficult times, things friends do. Just being a loving relationship doesn't eliminate the need for friends (male or female) outside of the confines of that relationship. That said, while I have been honest with my GF about this female friend and the fact that we keep in touch, I don't alert her every time we speak on the phone or every time we text each other. It's just a part of my day like anything else. If she asked, I would be honest. And to me, that is the crux of your problem, if there is one. Is he being honest with you? If not, THAT, not the relationship per se, is the issue. Why isn't he being honest with you and (by extension) what else has he not been honest about. I don't think men being friends with former flames is necessarily an issue as long as everything is honest and open. It's when things get shady that there's a problem. That's my 2 cents at least. 2
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