Tagalz Posted January 1, 2019 Posted January 1, 2019 Hey! this is both related to the new years eve party that I hosted and dating. I really need someone to talk to because my friend is sleeping and so is my parents. It's 06:30 in Norway and I still think about the drama at the party... read more under first off I want to say that If you're not interested in reading much then you should exit the thread. So I invited people over on facebook, instagram and snapchat. I was aware that people that I DON'T know were coming. And of course my friend was there, but they came very late. So it started really slow, then a girl called Lilly came and it changed everything. She only had 1 girl with her, but she told me that her male friends would come later. Her friend did not only steal my perfume and my firework, they did all sort of things like giving threats to people and inviting more people. I was really having a good time I got to know everybody but I could not control every person in there. It got to the point where some people told me that there's too much, and some people even "Chilled" in the hallway because it was overcrowded. It went out of the control and I almost had a fight with Lilly's male friend. Everyone was looking at me and said that I should do something because I was the host and most people there didn't like Lilly group. It got better when they left, but I was the one who had to apologize to everybody for not taking charge and not having control. What I learned from this is not to invite people that I don't know and also hide things better cause a perfume was stolen from me. Not only that but the girl that I hooked up with got her bag stolen who she had everything in it. Here is the girl part: We didn't really hook up. we were about to, but every time it got intense her friends comes in and interrupt us. Now there was some time when me and her got the room for us and that is when I tried to make a move, but she kept complaining that she was drunk and tired. So I came to conclussion that I should have sex with a drunk girl without her consent. I don't know what do to know. Should I apologize again to the people? what about the girl I hooked up with? should I send her a message?
basil67 Posted January 1, 2019 Posted January 1, 2019 Sorry it all got out of hand. 1. No you don't need to apologise again. But do make sure they aren't invited to any future events. 2. I don't know what to do about the girl you forced yourself upon. She was very clear that she was too drunk and too tired, but you got your own needs met without her consent. You don't say how far things went, but you could be at risk of having rape or sexual assault charges pressed on you. I guess you need to seek legal advice. Speak with your parents.
Author Tagalz Posted January 1, 2019 Author Posted January 1, 2019 (edited) Sorry it all got out of hand. 1. No you don't need to apologise again. But do make sure they aren't invited to any future events. 2. I don't know what to do about the girl you forced yourself upon. She was very clear that she was too drunk and too tired, but you got your own needs met without her consent. You don't say how far things went, but you could be at risk of having rape or sexual assault charges pressed on you. I guess you need to seek legal advice. Speak with your parents. Oh I already did.... not inviting them on future events? I could but then I need more control such as saying that they could only bring 5 people etc. Or I bring my friend to control She wasn’t really drunk I would say. She could speak normally and had self control. She came to me when I was with my good friend Alex. She and alex was talking alot about school stuff but she was always flirting with me so I took that as a sign and layed my arm around her. She responded with kissing me. However when we got that moment, that was when she made it clear that she was tired and cold. Meaning not interested in sex. I did not got my need bro. I did not have sex with her because I did not get her consent. Her saying that she’s cold and tired is a way of telling me no. Edited January 1, 2019 by Tagalz
basil67 Posted January 1, 2019 Posted January 1, 2019 Perhaps there’s an error in your first post. You said you came to the conclusion that you should have sex with a girl without her consent. Did you mean to write “shouldn’t”? 1
Author Tagalz Posted January 1, 2019 Author Posted January 1, 2019 Perhaps there’s an error in your first post. You said you came to the conclusion that you should have sex with a girl without her consent. Did you mean to write “shouldn’t”? Yes. I ment to write «shouldn’t» but I’m not mad about not getting it. For me the most important thing is for everyone to have fun and I don’t think they did. The only people who had fun was Lilly doing all the bad stuff...
Art Anderson Posted January 1, 2019 Posted January 1, 2019 Yes, when strangers are allowed to show up without someone you already know, and there are other strangers tagging along, things can go wrong. One of the teenage boys in the house next to mine had a party when his parents were out of town for a few days and it got out of hand. Someone threw a bottle over the hedge and broke the windshield of my car. The boy said he was intimidated by the unknown guys who were older and bigger. He had only said OK to one but he brought the rest with him. This is what they regularly do in that town. The party quickly got too crazy. He also said the police came to his house but they were told only these older boys were doing the drinking so everything was OK. The police didn't do anything (SMH). That was a big reason I was glad to be moving away. I couldn't wait enough years for those 3 teenage brothers next door to each make their mistakes and grow up. That town has a serious teen drinking problem, down to 13 year old girls staggering down the center of the street with a beer bottles at 3 a.m.
Author Tagalz Posted January 1, 2019 Author Posted January 1, 2019 Yes, when strangers are allowed to show up without someone you already know, and there are other strangers tagging along, things can go wrong. One of the teenage boys in the house next to mine had a party when his parents were out of town for a few days and it got out of hand. Someone threw a bottle over the hedge and broke the windshield of my car. The boy said he was intimidated by the unknown guys who were older and bigger. He had only said OK to one but he brought the rest with him. This is what they regularly do in that town. The party quickly got too crazy. He also said the police came to his house but they were told only these older boys were doing the drinking so everything was OK. The police didn't do anything (SMH). That was a big reason I was glad to be moving away. I couldn't wait enough years for those 3 teenage brothers next door to each make their mistakes and grow up. That town has a serious teen drinking problem, down to 13 year old girls staggering down the center of the street with a beer bottles at 3 a.m. I get it. What I learned is to not invite people I don’t know. Some people did like the party and some don’t. They even sent me a text saying they liked it. Not lilly but others. It was yesterday so I probably shouldn’t think so much over it. All I have to do is to apologise and then not invite them again. As for the girl I almost hooked up with... yeah I could try to snap her to see if she’s interested.
smackie9 Posted January 1, 2019 Posted January 1, 2019 Hey I have been to my share of parties, and most of the time there has been some kind of incident. Someone puking all over themselves, or a BF/GF fight, a girl sleeping with several guys, some stranger was causing a ruckus, theft, property damage, someone getting injured, someone getting belligerent or uninvited guests showing up, cops hammering on the door...ahhh good times lol. So OP when you get a lot of people in a confined space getting wasted, something is bound to happen, so it be the norm, don't sweat it. A word of caution, play it safe, never post your party on social media. Make sure your guests let you know if they are bringing someone you don't know, and be sure to tell them they are their responsibility. As for the girl that had her purse stolen, not your responsibility, it was her's, she should have known better. I never bring my purse to anyone's party and always wear crappy looking shoes, so no one will walk off with them.
Cersei Posted January 1, 2019 Posted January 1, 2019 Oh yes the social media party posts. Thank God there was no internet when I was younger!:p:p
Giraffe-A Posted January 1, 2019 Posted January 1, 2019 Okay, I was confused about the part with girl. It read that you made the decision to have sex with a drunk girl, but just read your second comment that you did not. Whew! No need to apologize for the party. It happens. You would still technically be responsible for the girl’s purse and belongings. I may offer to help replace some of those things that were stolen. Just screen your parties better next time.
smackie9 Posted January 1, 2019 Posted January 1, 2019 Oh yes the social media party posts. Thank God there was no internet when I was younger!:p:p It was worse because it only took one person at the arcade to mention a party, then the whole town would show up including the local bikers. lol 1
preraph Posted January 1, 2019 Posted January 1, 2019 Parties can easily spin out of control because people invite everyone. It's always good to plan ahead and do "invitation only" at the door and have someone who can handle kicking someone out tending the door. You'd have to hire that. You don't need to apologize to the girl as long as you stopped when she said to. But it doesn't sound like she's as interested in you as you are her. You should block Lilly on all social media and any friends of hers so she can't crash a party you have again.
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted January 1, 2019 Posted January 1, 2019 Instead of feeling so bad about a party that got out of control and strangers may not have enjoyed themselves, feel good about yourself for not taking advantage of the drunk girl. Ya done good!
Author Tagalz Posted January 1, 2019 Author Posted January 1, 2019 Okay, I was confused about the part with girl. It read that you made the decision to have sex with a drunk girl, but just read your second comment that you did not. Whew! No need to apologize for the party. It happens. You would still technically be responsible for the girl’s purse and belongings. I may offer to help replace some of those things that were stolen. Just screen your parties better next time. yes I wanted to have sex with her, but I decided not to only after she said that she was cold and tired. Which means I respected that and I did not do it. Yes it was good that I did not do it hahah. It's not really my fault that her purse got stolen. What is my fault is that I had no control. People stealing is not my responsibility.
Author Tagalz Posted January 1, 2019 Author Posted January 1, 2019 It was worse because it only took one person at the arcade to mention a party, then the whole town would show up including the local bikers. lol Yeah I guess next time I won't post it on social media. People get hyped for parties cause they get in without drinks so basically free stuff for everyone hahah
Author Tagalz Posted January 1, 2019 Author Posted January 1, 2019 But it doesn't sound like she's as interested in you as you are her. You should block Lilly on all social media and any friends of hers so she can't crash a party you have again. Well how come? She was being flirty and playful all night? yeah I blocked lilly the first thing in the morning hahaha
Author Tagalz Posted January 1, 2019 Author Posted January 1, 2019 Instead of feeling so bad about a party that got out of control and strangers may not have enjoyed themselves, feel good about yourself for not taking advantage of the drunk girl. Ya done good! Actually she wasn't drunk. More so that she was not in the mood for it I would say. She was also depressed because she lost her purse, she was cold and tired. Yeah not exactly in the mood. But I agree I did good! I just don't know what to do? my intention is to hook up with her, but how? by inviting her to my next party? Come with her to another party?
Author Tagalz Posted January 1, 2019 Author Posted January 1, 2019 Forget hookups a date is better and what do you readers think if I say this "I want to get to know you better, so let's go on a date" 1
Author Tagalz Posted January 2, 2019 Author Posted January 2, 2019 Yes I like that. Haha I’ll ask! But god damn you should know how many girls I got on snapchat from the party. Like 12 girls. But the bad thing is that they just see me as «the guy that hosts parties» hahah do you think I have a chance to hang out with them without partying?
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