The_Wanderer Posted December 22, 2018 Posted December 22, 2018 (edited) Brief Details about Me: Age: 20 Job(s): 1, part-time School: College Vehicle: Yes Personality: Outgoing, but can be reserved Brief Details of Her: Age: 20 Job(s): 1-2, part-time School: University Vehicle: Yes Personality: Reserved, gets anxious in public settings To sum things up, I met her about 2-3 months ago when I was introduced to her at work by a couple of mutual friends. We started off talking almost every night until 3-4am in the morning and found a lot of similarities with each other. A few things to note is that we due live 1 1/2 hour drive away and we haven't really seen each other all that much in person. Lately, her and I have had finals and she also has been working a lot. She doesn't want to rush into something extremely serious yet and I definitely respect that. Either way I've noticed a few things. 1) She doesn't ever text, call me or bring up the idea seeing each other unless I do so first. 2) Often times when I (or anyone else compliment or show affection to her), she often will just reply "stfu" or "gtfo" jokingly. 3) She says will say "sorry I'm busy with school, work or seeing family" whenever I ask to see her. As of writing this, it's almost Christmas and I've brought up a few times getting together to exchange presents, however she doesn't seem to give a solid response. If you're still following me, you might be thinking, "do you communicate these concerns with her?" Well, the scoop is she has stated before she does not like "clingy" men. Secondly, we really only have been seeing each other for two months. So at least in my books, I don't even consider that to be a full on relationship yet. There's no full on commitment that needs to be made. Right now, I'm just a bit lost on how to proceed. Should I just keep calm, patient and see how things turn out? Should I be vocal to her about these concerns? Let me know what you think. Edited December 22, 2018 by The_Wanderer
preraph Posted December 23, 2018 Posted December 23, 2018 Nah, she's not interested. If she was interested she wouldn't be saying no and putting you off. Women aren't direct about that because they don't want to hurt feelings or make you mad, but there is no indication she wants to go out with you. You may have interests in common, but she's apparently not attracted to want to date. Sorry. Don't keep waiting and hoping. There's plenty other girls.
Mrs._December Posted December 23, 2018 Posted December 23, 2018 LOL. I have to say it. I can tell you're extremely young because you felt the need to put in a 'vehicle' category in your details about yourself and this young lady. Too cute. I'm sorry but this girl clearly is NOT on the same page as you. You say 'we're seeing each other' but I don't see anything that indicates that at all in your post. I see a young man who is clearly infatuated with a young lady who is far too busy to see you as anything but a DISTANT friend. More, you live an hour and a half away and to her, you might as well live on the moon. It's not like you two can get an impromptu cup of coffee or a burger or hang out in each other's dorms anytime you want. To see her, you have to orchestrate a time and place and date to do it and that has to mesh with HER schedule. So, you might as well live on the moon in her eyes. So at least in my books, I don't even consider that to be a full on relationship yet. I'm afraid that's an understatement. I think you've been friend-zoned, and within that friend zone, you're not even a Tier #1. I feel bad saying that, I truly do. But she won't even commit to a gift exchange with you, so you need to look at the writing on the wall. This isn't a scheduling problem, it's more a case of you not reading the message she's clearly sending. I just think is a case of unrequited love, Wanderer. I'm sorry.
Giraffe-A Posted December 23, 2018 Posted December 23, 2018 She doesn’t want to rush into anything serious right now means she’s not looking for a relationship with you. 2 jobs, college and family do take a huge part of someone’s day, so she really sounds like she can’t invest in anything else. At this point, it would be best to withdraw, stop contacting her by phone completely and simply make small convo when you work together. If there’s any interest on her end, she should and will text you. If not, then find a girl that does have time for you.
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