uk21 Posted December 11, 2018 Posted December 11, 2018 Hello all, I’ve been dealing with this woman for about 2 years now. We Got into a verbal altercation a few days ago. I said some things out of anger and haven’t heard from her since. She told me to never text her phone again! This happens too many times then I’d like, but I feel this time is really “it” Anyways I’m kind of torn my mind and heart feel two different ways. This woman is beautiful I’m very attracted to her pretty face nice body etc. But my mind is looking at the future. even though she’s beautiful it’s like we’re two different people. She has no goals for her future, barely finished high school, she only babysits full time. I hate placing judgement on someone I have feelings for but it’s like she doesnt want to better herself, she’s comfortable where she is at. I’m looking at this like what if we move in together and I lose my job would she have enough money to cover the bills? What if we decide to have kids will that income be enough? I’m so torn on what to do!! I have a lot of love for her but it seems like as a person she’s not the person for me. It’s just so hard to let go of someone you want but they don’t reach your standards of wifey material. Do I text her and work it out or let her move on to someone who sees her as wifey material?? Any advice is appreciated
PegNosePete Posted December 11, 2018 Posted December 11, 2018 It seems a fairly moot point since she told you to never text her again. I would respect her wishes. 2
stillafool Posted December 11, 2018 Posted December 11, 2018 Hello all, I’ve been dealing with this woman for about 2 years now. We Got into a verbal altercation a few days ago. I said some things out of anger and haven’t heard from her since. She told me to never text her phone again! This happens too many times then I’d like, but I feel this time is really “it” Anyways I’m kind of torn my mind and heart feel two different ways. This woman is beautiful I’m very attracted to her pretty face nice body etc. But my mind is looking at the future. even though she’s beautiful it’s like we’re two different people. She has no goals for her future, barely finished high school, she only babysits full time. I hate placing judgement on someone I have feelings for but it’s like she doesnt want to better herself, she’s comfortable where she is at. I’m looking at this like what if we move in together and I lose my job would she have enough money to cover the bills? What if we decide to have kids will that income be enough? I’m so torn on what to do!! I have a lot of love for her but it seems like as a person she’s not the person for me. It’s just so hard to let go of someone you want but they don’t reach your standards of wifey material. Do I text her and work it out or let her move on to someone who sees her as wifey material?? Any advice is appreciated Did you know find out these things about her whe you first started dating her? If so, why are you upset now? You could have ended it when you found out she had no ambition.
uniplex Posted December 11, 2018 Posted December 11, 2018 I'm curious why you want to work it out with her, knowing that she has no goals and wouldn't be able to carry her weight in the relationship (so to speak). A relationship can't be solely based on the physical. It will never work out in the end! 1
Author uk21 Posted December 11, 2018 Author Posted December 11, 2018 Just comfortable that’s all. Hoping I can shake that mindset
Orokotikki Posted December 11, 2018 Posted December 11, 2018 Follow the head on your shoulders, not the other one. Move on, and find someone who also has a beautiful mind and heart. 1
stillafool Posted December 11, 2018 Posted December 11, 2018 Follow the head on your shoulders, not the other one. Move on, and find someone who also has a beautiful mind and heart. Just because she has no ambition does not mean she doesn't have a beautiful mind. It's just different from his. He needs someone with a like mind and heart. He just doesn't want to let her go because she's good looking.
Orokotikki Posted December 11, 2018 Posted December 11, 2018 Naturally SAF, you are correct. Beauty being in the eye of the beholder, I meant he should find one which he judged to have a beautiful mind and heart (one which he found appealing/compatible). Perhaps not my best word choice in my response. 1
stillafool Posted December 11, 2018 Posted December 11, 2018 But she said don't contact again! Respect that! And find someone new to date... someone that doesn't fight with you - someone more compatible. You've wasted two years - don't settle again. She's taking the spot that could be reserved for someone amazing. As long as you're seeing her you're not likely to search for a better match. I agree with this plus there are plenty of good looking women out there with the goals and education you require. You will not be lonely.
d0nnivain Posted December 11, 2018 Posted December 11, 2018 You think she's sexy & good enough to fool around with now but you have no respect for her & you certainly don't want to marry her. While you are with her, you can't very well be on the prowl for someone you may want to marry. Stop using her. This fight was so ugly that she told you never to contact her again. Give her that one gift & abide by her wishes. 2
HumanMachine Posted December 11, 2018 Posted December 11, 2018 She’s a waster. Ditch the stress and move on..
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