jen_jen_heartbroken Posted September 14, 2005 Posted September 14, 2005 ...shouldn't you call or make some sort of contact with them once a day, even if just for a minute or two to let them know that you're thinking about them and to see how their day is? Especially if that someone is going through a rough patch?
curiousnycgirl Posted September 14, 2005 Posted September 14, 2005 Of course you should - but you cannot get upset if they are going through a rough patch and don't really want to talk - or can't talk - or whatever. Conversely - not everyone realizes this, so you can't necessarily hold it against them if they don't call. In fact some people are just not phone people.
Author jen_jen_heartbroken Posted September 14, 2005 Author Posted September 14, 2005 My boyfriend knows I'm going through some pretty bad stuff, and when we're together he will say, "You don't have to go through this alone. I love you and I'm here for you."....etc.... But then he doesn't call for more than two days.
Merin Posted September 14, 2005 Posted September 14, 2005 My boyfriend knows I'm going through some pretty bad stuff, and when we're together he will say, "You don't have to go through this alone. I love you and I'm here for you."....etc.... But then he doesn't call for more than two days. Sorry you're going through a rough time right now Jen I feel you on this though... I am going through a really hard time right now and my BF said to me "Don't give up Merin, I'm not going to let you... I'm here for you and I love you" only to tell me about 2 days later that he's going on vacation then got pissed off when I didn't show enough happiness for him in that We haven't spoken since...and he's on vacation...
Author jen_jen_heartbroken Posted September 14, 2005 Author Posted September 14, 2005 Men are so insensitive. All I want/need from him is a two minute call. He shouldn't have gloated his vacation in your face. Not nice at all.
Merin Posted September 14, 2005 Posted September 14, 2005 Men are so insensitive. All I want/need from him is a two minute call. He shouldn't have gloated his vacation in your face. Not nice at all. Exactly... hope things improve for you girly.
Author jen_jen_heartbroken Posted September 14, 2005 Author Posted September 14, 2005 You too darlin! And hopefully soon you'll get that vacation that YOU deserve!
RecordProducer Posted September 14, 2005 Posted September 14, 2005 Jen and Merin, I am sorry to hear you're sad. Men are often like children - they expect us (their mothers) to always be happy for them. We are not supposed to feel down, cuz moms never complain to their kids. If you ask them for help directly they will probably help you. They don't like to guess, they want you to tell them what they are supposed to do. Men also hate unhappy women. They feel weak when their women are not cheerful. For some reason they take it as their personal failure. They want their presence in your life to be enough for you to jump of euphorical joy 24/7. They also want us to be strong, emotionally stable, and well-balanced. Go figure... Take 'em or leave 'em, what can you do? You know the saying: you can't live with them, but you can't kill them all.
JS17 Posted September 14, 2005 Posted September 14, 2005 You know the saying: you can't live with them, but you can't kill them all. Hey Jen - sorry to hear that things aren't going great for you and your boyfriend is being insensitive. Have you told him you'd appreciate a phone call more often when you're going through things? Sometimes you have to tell them exactly what to do cause they are so oblivious. Merin - seriously girl, the more I hear about your boyfriend the more I dislike him, and I don't even know him! Take some of that cold medicine, get a good night sleep and kick his butt out the door! You can do sooo much better. I think we just started a guys suck / girl power thread! woohooo:bunny:
noname Posted September 14, 2005 Posted September 14, 2005 just a thought... sometimes... we like to let you sort out things for yourself. we may not call... but it doesn't mean that we do not care. my woman loves to play tough. she does not like to rely on anyone. so when she is going through some shisse, she wants to be alone to go through it. it is up to me to decide whether or not she needs verbal support or "stay clear and out of my way" support. RP is right. we don't like to guess. but it is part of our reality, so we have no choice. we really would like to get it right 24/7. but we can't. so we play our hand as best we can. when i am in doubt, i like to give space where it is needed.... i can not speak for anyone's man (they may be a-holes), but i can tell you to try to look at things a different way...
chaos70 Posted September 14, 2005 Posted September 14, 2005 I'll take the bullet for the guys then. Yes we are dumber than dirt.
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