Dumped and Looking for 2nd chance - for Guys -Tips

[Sadlygone]

Here are things that I think can help, from my own experience, for those who may be trying to reconcile with SO for a second chance.

 

1. After the time out from one another, take some time and write down issues that you have and issues you know she has with you. Think about all the quarrels and what was always being repeated by her.

 

2. Think of the things that she likes for you to do for her and see if you have been becoming more complacent. Figure out why the level of attention has been sliding and see how you can be more receptive to her. Write down what you can do to end this habit.

 

3. Reflect and think whether you see this person in your future realistically. Ask yourself what kind of future you want and how she fits in your future. Now, make an assessment of your present situation regarding emotional well being, financial status, and physical health. Is there something now or looming in the future that you know can be difficult in the present and near future. Now find out what it is that you want to do with yourself in the short term and long term. Make sure you clearly think about what it is that you want to do. When this is done, you will need to make a list of your goals with your SO in mind and put down in writing what you need to do to accomplish your goals.

 

Upon meeting her.

 

3. If she knows and feels it already, then you don't have to pour your heart out. Simply tell her that you love her with all your heart. You only want the best for her and you would like for things to work by working on the issues. Find out what her needs are and what is not being met. Tell her what your needs are and what is not being met. Remember, this is not a time to fight. Don't get upset if she says something to you that you feel you have been doing.

 

4. Don't assume anything. Ask her what assumptions she has been having about you and the relationship. This is a time to try to ease her confusion and explain anything that is unclear.

 

5. Go through your list of goals with her. You want her to know that you have YOUR and HER future in mind. She is looking for stability. If she does not feel that you can provide that stability, she will continue to have questions. You want her to feel that there is a reason to continue.

 

6. Finally. Always remember this day. Be sure that you look back on this day as much as you can because she will. Because there will be things that were promised and said to comfort her. If you do not make solid improvements, and if you go back to your old ways, then you will have given her back her insecurities again. There's so much that she can take and what happens next, you will find yourself in the coping section.